Different attitudes to money

Newly_retired

I am despairing of DH.
He has recently cashed in an investment, at a point when it was doing very well, after many years. I have no problem with that, as he was always unhappy with the fact that value of the investment fell in the early years. He called it gambling, and wished he had not invested.

What bothers me is that the money is just sitting in his current account, earning almost no interest. He refuses to open a better current account because he doesn't want the faff of moving money around, let alone setting up a standing order to take advantage of the very good interest rates on some accounts, switching bonuses etc.

Of course, it is his money, his choice, but he resents me making any suggestions, using the knowledge gained from MSE. It is so frustrating, but is just one of many examples of his attitudes hardening into fixed ideas instead of being intelligent and flexible.

Is this part of ageing?
Anyone else met this problem?
I guess I just have to try and keep out of it?
By the way, we each have our own accounts, plus a joint one for household bills.

Farway

Get off his back love, he is a grown man and does not need or require your nagging, he can and will make his own mind up, if & when he chooses

Interest rates are a joke, and I agree with him, the faff to get few extra pence is more than it is worth for average bloke

SevenOfNine

Yikes, I can't believe 'blokes' are all as Farway describes! :eek:

Mine is quite happy to let me 'faff' about to my heart's content with mine, his & our money so that it works better for us (but without risk). Mainly because he's busy working 2 days a week & golfing 4 mornings - hence he isn't 'faffing' with it himself (yet).

What I do wonder though OP, how well is your own and the joint a/c working for you (just leave his festering, earning absolutely nothing in 'switching' or interest).

Hop over to the banking forum & check the ease with which you can earn up to £150 to 'switch' to Yorkshire/Clydesdale/First Direct/M&S/Co-op and/or % interest on a/c balances simply by bouncing in & straight back out (if necessary) a set amount of money each month.

Plenty of 'blokes' there managing it.........& even advising us females!!! :T :T :rotfl:

Biggles

Newly_retired wrote: »

Of course, it is his money, his choice

I was going to disagree and point out that it is 'your' joint money till I saw the last para.

But it is really, isn't it? I'm sure you both had good reasons for keeping your money separate, some couples do, but your household sinks or swims together.

Maybe he would listen if you suggested that you, as the more 'money-conscious' one, took over and handled these accounts? it would make sense but I'm sure it would need to be approached carefully.....

nearlyrich

My DH faffs more than I do with his investments he has more time than me, we often discuss various options and share info on new accounts etc.

PennyForThem_2

Have you thought of getting proper advice? We did when husband was about to retire and had pension pot and no idea whether provider offering annuity was good/best or not.


I am middle class - I save, I have property, I have pensions. I have little financial expertise apart from what I read in papers and radio.


My IFA has advised and increased my wealth. Now no longer commission, it is all up front. In my last consultation she saved for me the fee I will have to pay her by her recommendations. I don't have to go with the advice and it is all explained in layman terms.




Even when she was in another firm and on commission she advised sticking as annuity gave widow's pension, 4% per annum inflation and for life.


For me, I think that the expertise you buy is well worth it

Newly_retired

Thanks for all your replies.
Pennyforthem, we used an IFA for the investment my DH has just withdrawn. He was never happy with investing to be honest.
Meanwhile I look after our joint Santander 123 account and my own various accounts, regular savers etc. I am a saver, he is a spender.
We are fortunate that it is not a problem.

jennifernil

I have always taken charge of the money in our relationship.

a) since I had far more time to do it than OH

b) having a financial family background I was more comfortable with it.

OH is since retirement taking more interest, especially as I insisted he needed to know what I was doing, but still leaves the day-to-day stuff to me, just moves money when I tell him to.

DD is of the same mould as me and asks me for advice, her fiancee is hopeless and sees no point in moving money to gain a few pounds per month. His Dad is hopeless with money too.

It seems to be a "man thing" in many cases IMO.

We have a joint account for our spending, but separate accounts for saving as I am not a taxpayer. For this reason, most of our savings are in my name.

pineapple123

Newly_retired wrote: »

I am despairing of DH.
He has recently cashed in an investment, at a point when it was doing very well, after many years. I have no problem with that, as he was always unhappy with the fact that value of the investment fell in the early years. He called it gambling, and wished he had not invested.

What bothers me is that the money is just sitting in his current account, earning almost no interest. He refuses to open a better current account because he doesn't want the faff of moving money around, let alone setting up a standing order to take advantage of the very good interest rates on some accounts, switching bonuses etc.

Of course, it is his money, his choice, but he resents me making any suggestions, using the knowledge gained from MSE. It is so frustrating, but is just one of many examples of his attitudes hardening into fixed ideas instead of being intelligent and flexible.

Is this part of ageing?
Anyone else met this problem?
I guess I just have to try and keep out of it?
By the way, we each have our own accounts, plus a joint one for household bills.

My OH has the same attitude as your husband so its not an age thing.
a) too much bother
b) the banks etc know best
c) whats the point for a few pence more

Its no good getting cross, they do not have your knowledge learnt on MSE. we may not know everything but we get a fair idea about finances.
I agree its his money but its fustrating as all you want to do is help get the most out of it for him and less for the greedy banks/Building societies.

The best way forward is to look at ways to save/invest that money and present him with a rundown ie say to him you could make £200 more by saving in this particular ISA which will pay for a great weekend away. Sorry you may have to do the legwork fill out the forms, just get him to read and sign or make that bank/building society appointment and go with him.
However dont keep pushing it, leave it for a while find out what works best for his money then mention it again in a casual way if OH is still really resistant then you have done your best and just have to leave it.

scotsbob

Farway wrote: »

Get off his back love, he is a grown man and does not need or require your nagging, he can and will make his own mind up, if & when he chooses

Interest rates are a joke, and I agree with him, the faff to get few extra pence is more than it is worth for average bloke

You got that one right.


Imagine having to get up each morning to have someone nagging you about what to do with your hard earned.

Newly_retired

It is something I raise only about every 3 months, and not out of the blue.

Thanks pineapple123 for your helpful suggestions.