Moving In With Girlfriend

Guest101

BoJangles wrote: »

When I remortgaged my property my ex partner had to sign a form giving up any rights to the property in case of a split.

Indeed, because the mortgage company doesnt want someone else claiming on the property if you default.

fivetide

Guest101 wrote: »

It's been suggested already. They share bills and costs, but no rent is charged.

Already replied about that above.

They are one household. If they applied for benefits, they would be one household.

No disagreement there. Never said otherwise.

There is no 'lodger' agreement possible.

Either he pays towards the mortgage, or he doesnt. It's that simple.

Are you saying it isn't possible to sign a legal agreement saying you have no interest in another person's assets? Because I'm pretty sure you are wrong.

No point trying to screw the OP over what he is legally entitled to

Again no one is saying the OP is going to get screwed over. If anything it is the OH he is moving in with that is at risk. Unless, by this you are already seeing a break up and suggesting the OP stick the knife in?


As has been said, you can't tell what will happen in a break up. The OP isn't the one at risk at all. He just asked what would be 'right'. For me, refusing to pay anything but half the bills and refusing to contribute should any maintenance issues arise isn't very partner like and certainly isn't what he was looking for.

Mojisola

heartbreak_star wrote: »

I see where you are coming from, but at the same time I suppose everything varies from situation to situation. I would be horrified if it was implied I was building beneficial interest in the property.

If you are paying towards the mortgage, either directly or through overpaying other bills, you will be building up a beneficial interest.

What you don't have to do is pursue this if the relationship broke up.

Many people who break up accept that they would have been paying rent if they had lived elsewhere and walk away without making any claims on the property. It's the break-ups that turn nasty that the homeowner needs to protect him/herself from.

Guest101

fivetide wrote: »

Are you saying it isn't possible to sign a legal agreement saying you have no interest in another person's assets? Because I'm pretty sure you are wrong.


Not what i said. Just that a lodgers agreement wouldnt cut it. And that such an agreement may not be valid.


Again no one is saying the OP is going to get screwed over. If anything it is the OH he is moving in with that is at risk. Unless, by this you are already seeing a break up and suggesting the OP stick the knife in?

How is the OH being screwed over - she has someone else paying her mortgage for her!

As has been said, you can't tell what will happen in a break up. The OP isn't the one at risk at all. He just asked what would be 'right'. For me, refusing to pay anything but half the bills and refusing to contribute should any maintenance issues arise isn't very partner like and certainly isn't what he was looking for.

But it's partner like to have someone else pay off the mortgage and get nothing for it? and before people say renting is dead money. When you rent you get a lease, you get security, you get all your repairs paid for. The OP is expected to act like a homeowners, without the rights of being one.

Reply above in red

fivetide

Are you saying it isn't possible to sign a legal agreement saying you have no interest in another person's assets? Because I'm pretty sure you are wrong.


Not what i said. Just that a lodgers agreement wouldnt cut it. And that such an agreement may not be valid.

And I already said the simple act of a legally binding doc is all I was trying to get across. You are still fixated on one word and I have already responded to that.


So you keep pushing the same, unhelpful point. I am glad you agree I was right - the OP could get a legal doc saying they have no interest. Shame you didn't just say so earlier.


Again no one is saying the OP is going to get screwed over. If anything it is the OH he is moving in with that is at risk. Unless, by this you are already seeing a break up and suggesting the OP stick the knife in?

How is the OH being screwed over - she has someone else paying her mortgage for her!


OP gets to live there 'rent free' and according to the proposal you back, contribute nothing to the property in terms of repairs etc and if it all goes wrong walks off with equity in a property that, might well have taken some real blood sweat and tears to get hold of and you are worried about the OP? Really?


As has been said, you can't tell what will happen in a break up. The OP isn't the one at risk at all. He just asked what would be 'right'. For me, refusing to pay anything but half the bills and refusing to contribute should any maintenance issues arise isn't very partner like and certainly isn't what he was looking for.

But it's partner like to have someone else pay off the mortgage and get nothing for it? and before people say renting is dead money. When you rent you get a lease, you get security, you get all your repairs paid for. The OP is expected to act like a homeowners, without the rights of being one.


Then you need (as I said) a different solution. Again, do you really think it is fair if the OP pays nothing whatsoever towards any repairs etc? Do you feel that is partner like? No one is advocating 50/50 but to expect someone to have just half the electricity bill to pay does not seem fair and that was the OP's original point. He was happy to pay his OH half of all costs and good on him, doesn't want to be seen as a !!!!!!!!!!


I would be looking for a better solution than that. Perhaps they do put his 'half' aside to build up a fighting fun for their own place. Maybe they rent the current property out and rent somewhere together. Maybe the OP has a deposit already stashed away, you don't know that. All I can see is a chap trying to do his best.

Reply above in blue.


why is free-load-er a banned word?

Fencer

So I think this thread has gone way beyond what I was expecting. The arrangement as I see it will be beneficial on both sides. I will be paying vastly less per month than I currently am at the moment while paying for rent.

I know it's realistic to think about what would happen if we were to split up, so I appreciate the time you have all taken to discuss this (and it's opened my eyes to things I hadn't even considered), but in all honesty - I would walk away knowing that I have saved cash. I'd never try to take a claim on the property that she took time and effort to get a deposit for, having not bothered doing the same.

In an ideal world, I'd have property too. We'd both sell and get something nicer together. I have been less sensible with money over the years though and have landed quite luckily into a situation where we can both contribute to our future together.

fivetide

Mojisola wrote: »

What you don't have to do is pursue this if the relationship broke up.

Many people who break up accept that they would have been paying rent if they had lived elsewhere and walk away without making any claims on the property. It's the break-ups that turn nasty that the homeowner needs to protect him/herself from.

Exactly my point.

fivetide

Fencer wrote: »

So I think this thread has gone way beyond what I was expecting. The arrangement as I see it will be beneficial on both sides. I will be paying vastly less per month than I currently am at the moment while paying for rent.

I know it's realistic to think about what would happen if we were to split up, so I appreciate the time you have all taken to discuss this (and it's opened my eyes to things I hadn't even considered), but in all honesty - I would walk away knowing that I have saved cash. I'd never try to take a claim on the property that she took time and effort to get a deposit for, having not bothered doing the same.

In an ideal world, I'd have property too. We'd both sell and get something nicer together. I have been less sensible with money over the years though and have landed quite luckily into a situation where we can both contribute to our future together.

Good luck to you both. You seem an honourable chap and this thread showed you were looking to do the right thing.


All the best.

Guest101

Are you saying it isn't possible to sign a legal agreement saying you have no interest in another person's assets? Because I'm pretty sure you are wrong.


Not what i said. Just that a lodgers agreement wouldnt cut it. And that such an agreement may not be valid.

And I already said the simple act of a legally binding doc is all I was trying to get across. You are still fixated on one word and I have already responded to that.

Yes, that shows real commitment to the relationship and is very partnerlike. Please pay my mortgage for me, but if im sick of you, walk away with nothing.


So you keep pushing the same, unhelpful point. I am glad you agree I was right - the OP could get a legal doc saying they have no interest. Shame you didn't just say so earlier.

Not sure where i said i agreed with you?! Such agreements are not always enforceable.


Again no one is saying the OP is going to get screwed over. If anything it is the OH he is moving in with that is at risk. Unless, by this you are already seeing a break up and suggesting the OP stick the knife in?

How is the OH being screwed over - she has someone else paying her mortgage for her!


OP gets to live there 'rent free' and according to the proposal you back, contribute nothing to the property in terms of repairs etc and if it all goes wrong walks off with equity in a property that, might well have taken some real blood sweat and tears to get hold of and you are worried about the OP? Really?

The OP should save up his share to be used for a joint deposit. or for his own deposit, should things not go so well. That is not the same as rent free. The OPs partner gets the benefit of having bills / living costs shared. The addage 2 can live as cheaply as one comes to mind.

No, i didnt say that. I said that if the OP contributes nothing, he walks away with nothing. But if he contributes to the house. He should be gaining an equity in the house.


As has been said, you can't tell what will happen in a break up. The OP isn't the one at risk at all. He just asked what would be 'right'. For me, refusing to pay anything but half the bills and refusing to contribute should any maintenance issues arise isn't very partner like and certainly isn't what he was looking for.

But it's partner like to have someone else pay off the mortgage and get nothing for it? and before people say renting is dead money. When you rent you get a lease, you get security, you get all your repairs paid for. The OP is expected to act like a homeowners, without the rights of being one.


Then you need (as I said) a different solution. Again, do you really think it is fair if the OP pays nothing whatsoever towards any repairs etc? Do you feel that is partner like? No one is advocating 50/50 but to expect someone to have just half the electricity bill to pay does not seem fair and that was the OP's original point. He was happy to pay his OH half of all costs and good on him, doesn't want to be seen as a !!!!!!!!!!

No, i think the OP should get a ROI if he contributes to the house. That would be partner like.

I would be looking for a better solution than that. Perhaps they do put his 'half' aside to build up a fighting fun for their own place. Maybe they rent the current property out and rent somewhere together. Maybe the OP has a deposit already stashed away, you don't know that. All I can see is a chap trying to do his best.

I agree with this.

fivetide wrote: »

Reply above in blue.


why is free-load-er a banned word?

tea_lover

What a colourful argument!