help needed

itsmememe

hi dont no if anyone can help me or give me some ideas on how to help my wife she has been suffering from panic attackes for about a year and is finding it hard to leave the house she is on antidepressants and waiting for councilling the problem is she gets herselfvery upset about things and bottles it in we have a 5 year old girl and her sister has just had a baby .my wife suffered veryy bad with pd depression and got no help from her family just more upset .her sister newbaby is being treated like the first grandchild which my wife hasnot spoken about but i noshe is finding it very upsetting.they have already babysat it more times than our child i dont think they can see what its doing to her she just needs some help sometimes but i dont think she wants to come across as been jelouse

daisy_doughnut_2

hi there
i have been where your wife is an can understand how even the smallest things may cause her great upset
the only thing i can advise for you is to read up about her problems an try to understand how she is
im not saying you are adding any pressure but for example you saying would you like to go for a walk would make her feel not only anxious but quilty
i felt guilty all the time for not being able to do what is classed as the norm ie take my dd to the park

good luck have patience an the councelling will help her i had CBT an it realy helped me

smaller steps are better than bigger

daisy

Justie

oh bless I really feel for her - would she consider hypnotherapy? If she can work on her breathing then it'll help her to control the panic attacks and work on coping strategies for if one comes on when she's out and about. It would probably only take a few sessions if she can then work on the breathing at home too and she may well be able to get a practitioner to come to see her so as to reduce the stress even more.

I'd also recommend Bach's Rescue Remedy - a few drops taken before the panic attack takes hold can really help.

Sallys_Savings

I'd thoroughly recommend trying hypnotherapy.....it certainly helped me an awful lot with panic attacks. My hypnotherapist taped one of my sessions and I listen to it frequently and relax myself by playing it in headphones.It doesnt cure things but it definitely eases things.

Please continue with your patience and understanding even when you feel that its not getting you anywhere. Its a long process and unfortunately my oh thought I should get better almost overnight ....bless him its not a case of not loving but just not understanding as I can see it now.

Are you close enough to her family to explain what is happening?..I know it may be difficult but there may be one member you could speak to about how its making your wife feel perhaps using saying "us" rather than just your wife?
Are you able to visit the doctor again?..perhaps you speak to her doctor? (I know that they are unable to talk about the patient but you are able to put your view across on how your wife is feeling). Or visit the doctor together and support her that way? Sometimes a person doesnt really tell the doctor quite how bad they are feeling (I know I didnt).

I really do wish you both lots of luck and hopefully get out of this depression as soon as possible.

itsmememe

hi thank you for your help mywife has tried hypnothery and eft .the hypno seems to work better when she listerns to cd a home she got far to panicky when she when for hypnothery.
she doing well i just wish her family could see what they are doing to her we were really making progress there not the easyist people totalk to it will just get twisted round
thanks everyone

mrs_metal

Not a lot I can add to the above just to say a loving and understanding husband helps a lot, my husband gets angry and shouts at me when I get an attack, not for any nasty reason just because he's gets so worried about me and frustrated he can't do anything to make it go away and that seems to be the only way he can deal with it, which makes it a lot harder for me to handle the attack.

Definitely read up about it to give her support, it's helped me to find out exactly what triggers the attack but everyone is different.

Good luck it can be a long road to recovery. As for her family I don't know what to suggest, I've know some people that have just cut their family out of their life but that can bring it's own problems too. Maybe just limit contact with them for the next few years until your wife is feeling more able to deal with them

moanin'minnie

Theres not much more that I can add to whats already been said but it will get better in time ,and the CBT will help when she eventually gets it ,just try to be patient and understanding with her. I found that you just have to take each day one step at a time. It usually takes a while for the anti depressants to kick in but one morning she WILL wake up and feel a bit better and from there on take baby steps to feeling better, I have gone from not being able to leave the house to being back at work full time. Remember support from you and friends and taking small steps each days are the key and it will get better I promise!!