Initial appointment at CAMHS ?

freddiesmum09

Hi, just wondered if anyone had any experiences (good or bad) with camhs.

Have finally come to terms with the fact DS needs help and we've been referred

Feel exhausted and drained by ds's behaviour. School nurse has been working with him and has mentioned apergers/asd but said she could easily be wrong and it could be something different.
I feel sad for him, especially that he can't cope with normal day to day situations, changes in routine and cannot deal with any sort of friendship/relationship. He is lonely at school and is often observed alone when in the playground, if not being teased by other children. He struggles in almost every social situation and it breaks my heart that nothing I do seems to help him.

Any tips of what sort of info to have ready for the camhs assessment and who we will see/how long it will take?
I am taking DS alone but will probably end up emotional discussing some of the issues so would rather he was off playing or in a separate room so I can be completely honest about how bad it can be without him hearing and him getting the wrong idea. Will there be an opportunity for this?

Will they assess him in the first meet or do they go to school/home to observe him in a more natural environment?
Would be grateful for any help/advice. feeling so guilty I have left it so long and just hope I haven't damaged him further by not accepting help when we should have

cpt574

Hi, not sure I can be much help, but just wanted to say, don't worry you are doing the right thing. I guess each area is different but in our area the Camhs team have been great. They are very good at making things as easy for the child and the parent and know how difficult it is. Would imagine the initial appointment will just be a getting to know you session, and a general overview. Hope it goes well for you, I have been taking my teenage daughter for a couple of years, I think they have been a big part of keeping her safe when she was suffering awful depression. The one thing I would say is if you or your son don't get on with a member of staff keep trying new ones, we went through a few before finding someone who really clicked with her, and I feel made all the difference, good luck.

Savvy_Sue

You don't say how old your son is, but the fact that you mention him playing indicates that he's young enough that they wouldn't expect you to say everything in front of him. But how about writing a few things down and handing that over at the start of the meeting.

Please, don't beat yourself up about this. We do our best with what we've got: we may look back and think 'if only I'd known', but we didn't know.

Divorced_Daddy_001

freddiesmum09 wrote: »

Hi, just wondered if anyone had any experiences (good or bad) with camhs.

Have finally come to terms with the fact DS needs help and we've been referred

I feel sad for him, especially that he can't cope with normal day to day situations, changes in routine and cannot deal with any sort of friendship/relationship. He is lonely at school and is often observed alone when in the playground, if not being teased by other children. He struggles in almost every social situation and it breaks my heart that nothing I do seems to help him.

Any tips of what sort of info to have ready for the camhs assessment and who we will see/how long it will take?
I am taking DS alone but will probably end up emotional discussing some of the issues so would rather he was off playing or in a separate room so I can be completely honest about how bad it can be without him hearing and him getting the wrong idea. Will there be an opportunity for this?

Will they assess him in the first meet or do they go to school/home to observe him in a more natural environment?

Camhs services in one area of the country are likely to be rather different to those in other areas, due to the financial pressure that the nhs is under from commissioners and government in the current climate. The first appointment is likely to be an initial assessment which will be very broad in order to provide the member of staff (probably a Nurse) with a variety of background information about your son, the causes for concern (the difficulties that he is experiencing) and the referral that has been made by the School Nurse (or GP).

Some information that you could take with you: historical information (e.g. a chronology, including dates where possible / relevant) about things like; any difficulties during your pregnancy, any complications when he was born, any concerns shortly after he was born, any concerns regarding his development during his early years (Health Visitor information?), any major health / medical issues over the years, any mental health issues or concerns, any medication or supplements that he takes, a list of schools (and dates) he has attended, a list of home addresses (and dates), any history of significant family events (e.g. bereavement, divorce, domestic violence etc), any history of bullying, a detailed list of the sort of difficulties that you think he is experiencing and what other people (e.g. School Nurse, Teacher, GP, family members) have said to you about these concerns, any other services (including volunteers) who provide your son with any support (e.g. outreach worker via Social Services or a voluntary organisation). Tell them about anything that you think might be relevant, significant or important.

By the way, I'm not suggesting that you take ALL that information with you, those are just a few things for you to think about in the days / weeks before the appointment (and write it down so that you don't forget about it during the appointment). Camhs will hopefully already have some of this information but it depends on how much information was included in the referral that was sent to them and if they have permission to access any of your son's records with the GP or School Nurse.

You should be given an opportunity to discuss your concerns in private with the Nurse, so that you can talk candidly without having to do this in front of your son. If for any reason this opportunity isn't offered to you, then ask for it.

Use the initial appointment to ask any questions you have about the assessment process and the service that will be provided by camhs e.g. how long will the assessment process take, who will be doing it, where will it take place, what will happen when it is finished, who do I contact if I have any queries etc between appointments (do they have a "duty" system)? If you're not happy with the service that you're receiving from camhs, please tell somebody at camhs about this (e.g. the Nurse or a manager of the service or a senior member of staff). You might also want to ask if they will do any specific assessment to consider the possibility of autism / Aspergers, as the School Nurse has previously mentioned this to you.

Please try not to beat yourself up about all this (I know it's easier said than done though). Other people are trained to pick-up on things like this e.g. Teachers, School Nurse, GP, but parents rarely receive any training.

There's a website (and organisation?) called Contact a Family which might be of interest to you.

Apologies for my lengthy post, but I hope it helps a bit. Good luck and I hope they can provide your son with some useful support :T

freddiesmum09

Thankyou for the replies they are much appreciated. Sorry for taking so long to get round to reply.


School keeps asking to get cahms referral brought forward, not much I can do as the appt is in just over 2 weeks. This week he has apparently been awful at school. I ended up crying in the playground on Thursday, it was just the final straw being told how awful he's been every day. I just need to hear some positivity but the teacher said being firm/soft/normal just doesn't do anything.


I have done the DLA application and felt sick when completing it, don't think I've ever had to write anything so depressing in my life. Have also been writing a diary of major life events and a list of unusual behaviours with examples ready for the CAHMS meeting. Its so hard to write so many negatives about your own child. Clearly I adore him and love him to bits and reminding myself that I am trying to get him the money and help he needs and it won't change him as a person. Cos it isn't all bad, he is so kind and loving and just lovely and quirky.. but the forms and statement I am going to give to cahms just comes across as me moaning about what an awful child he is. Obviously he is difficult but hes also massively rewarding to parent and I enjoy his company and love him to pieces.


Panicking that cahms won't be able to do anything. Does anyone know if CAHMS tier 3 can make a diagnosis? I really want to know what is wrong rather than someone trying to put a plaster over it all? Will we be offered more support? I am just really worried that nothing is going to be done and I'll be left to struggle alone again Will cahms also help if he needs to be statemented? School keep telling me that he needs more 1-1 and group work but there isn't much I can do about it as I don't think they have the resources?


Ahh so frustrating and depressing being in limbo. Just getting desperate and struggling to cope. He needs help ASAP. x

DomRavioli

CAHMS can diagnose some issues - some need referring on to other specialists, so it will depend completely on your son and his issues.

I went to CAMHS a very long time ago (20 yearsish) and had positive experiences there. Just don't be nervous, and tell them the truth about his behaviour. If you can, ask the teacher/school to pop something down regarding frequency of the issues and anything that precedes them - it may speed things up.

Support - well that can mean anything from social services (they do a lot of supporting children with health issues) to counselling to medication to school help to self help. You need a diagnosis before you can treat it.

Statementing only happens once you have a diagnosis, you're getting way ahead of yourself here. Go to the appointment, ask a million questions, take all the pamphlets and get all the info you need.

2 weeks is a very short wait time, very short indeed. In a majority of places, it is a couple of months at least. Be patient, and know you will be seen as soon as possible, and they will try their best to help both your son and his family to understand and cope with any issues he or you have.

It sounds like you're overwhelmed and need to take some time away from the situation. Is there any way you can have an hour to yourself? Just to let things settle.

Divorced_Daddy_001

Yes, it will all sound very negative and depressing when filling out DLA forms and making notes to take to camhs. But that's because you're trying to get him the help that he needs, so unfortunately you have to concentrate on the issues, difficulties and negative stuff in order to get that support for him. If it helps you to cope etc, start compiling a second list which is about recording the balanced view and all the wonderful and positive stuff about your son. It's ok to share some of that info with camhs (although they'll obviously want to concentrate on the issues and concerns) but definitely don't share any of it with your DLA application!

Expect to be unsuccessful in your application for DLA and to have to appeal. It could be difficult without a diagnosis, but keep trying for it.

Is there a Carer's Centre or any parent support groups in your area who you could maybe talk to and get some support and advice from? If you have the time and energy to start "networking" and making contacts with other people who are / have been in a similar situation to you, that could be a massive help to you over the long run.

With regards to an educational statement, my suggestion would be to NOT wait for the diagnosis as this could take a while yet. The statementing process also takes a while also but school already recognise that he needs additional support now, so an Educational Psychologist could be assessing this need and the issues that are already occurring in school, with a view to identifying the type of additional support that he needs there. Personally speaking, I'd be pushing for the two things (camhs assessment and statementing) to be running in parallel and at the same time, rather than consecutively.

Again, I'd also be bracing yourself for the education department to be reluctant to start the statementing process. I may be cynical, but if statementing is undertaken and additional needs are identified, then the council has to respond to that and meet those needs, but that has financial implications for over-stretched and limited budgets.

You might have to "fight" for every little bit of help that you can get for your son but it's a fight that's well worth having. Just try to undertake that "fight" in a measured and reasonable manner so as not to alienate the people who can help you. Get as much info as you can, from as many different sources of support and information as you can. Knowledge is power!

:beer:

mandragora_2

Lots of really good advice on here. Can I just add though, don't waste time and energy asking for a statement. They have been replaced under the new SEN reforms, by something called an EHC (Education, Health and Care plan).

Education, health and care plans to replace statements

Under the new rules, SEN statements and learning difficulty assessments (LDAs) will be replaced with education, health and care (EHC) plans taking children and young people up to the age of 25. From September, new assessments of SEN will follow the new rules, and support will be provided through an EHC plan.

This summary from the Guardian sets out the main changes:
http://www.theguardian.com/teacher-network/teacher-blog/2014/feb/10/special-educational-needs-sen-reforms-five-things

Ask, though, what the school is doing in respect of the education psychologist - I'd have thought having an ed psych assessment at this stage would be a good idea, and would help yourselves and the school to understand your child's needs, and know how to support him (and the family) in the very best way.

Finally has anyone at school mentioned to you, doing what used to be called a CAF - Common Assesment form, the 'common' may now have been replaced in your authority by the name of the county, instead (as in Leicestershire Assessment Form - a LAF!). This is a process that brings all the agencies involved together to see what the needs are and which agency is doing what (called a TAC meeting - team around the child).

All of these things can be a bit overwhelming at the time, but the thing is that what you're all going through isn't rare, and the one thing that has been shown to work again and again is when everyone works together to support the child and help the family. If the family is well supported, and the parents are helped and listened to, then that can only be for the good.

System

When my dd was referred to CAMHS I did have a chat to her before hand to explain that we have to be totally honest about what's going on even the bad bits of her behaviour just so that she didn't feel like I was getting at her.

The first contact was someone coming to the house for a chat that person decided if there was any need to continue to CAMHS.

Divorced_Daddy_001

Thanks for the info about EHC's, I didn't know that those reforms had already been implemented.

I agree with the suggestion about asking school to organise a TAC meeting as well, that's a great idea. That meeting should generate a plan so that you have something down in writing about the different issues that need to be addressed for your son, what will be done to address them and who will do each of those things.

freddiesmum09

Thankyou for the helpful replies and suggestions.


Think I am part of the problem, I am suffering from depression, single mum, signed off work so my whole life seems all over the place at the moment. Hearing negativity every day from my sons school nurse and school teacher can turn a good day into a bad one in seconds.


The HV and GP are supporting me and have been really good. The HV has referred us to the family resilience service. I am hoping he or she will help me with some of the practical stuff, maybe liaise with other people on my behalf so I am not having to deal with all the negativity. I know I need to know what's going on, but a lot of it is unhelpful when there is nothing I can do and the CAHMS appointment is so close. The teacher asking me to push for a paediatric referral and asking cahms to be brought forward doesn't really help. It just makes me feel like DS is beyond help.


School nurse has been working with DS for the past couple of months but is making little progress although he does enjoy the sessions, he only has 2 more sessions so I am dreading that ending and him losing 1-1 emotional support in the school setting. Hoping CAHMS is able to offer him some sort of help or therapy even if they feel they can't do anything to help him in the long term and refer him else where. I am starting to panic that he'll be referred on by cahms and then we are stuck for months waiting for the referral with no support. I'm sure they can't do that and I am just panicking.


He has been identified as being 'monitored' on the sen thing, or whatever its called now, yet I haven't even met the senco at the school? Just got a letter saying he wasn't at the expected level for his age.


He is on a behavioural plan at school which is doing nothing. Its all so depressing and negative.


We had a meeting at the school a few weeks ago with myself, schl nurse, health visitor and teacher to discuss ds, this was helpful and we have another one of these meetings after the cahms meeting, hopefully this will be helpful as cahms will make some suggestions of what to do about ds's schooling. Hopefully the resilience worker will be able to support me in this as I don't feel strong enough to fight alone for an ed psych to assess him etc they make it all so complicated...


We had a good day yesterday at a birthday party, he coped really well despite the nervousness and reluctance to go, so I am trying to remind myself its not all bad.


x