Back beyond Square One and in despair..

Robinson_Crusoe_2

I don't know what to do anymore....

I posted over a year ago here and, until recently, things had been going well....

Now, my depression is back and is deeper than ever before. I am back on medication and struggling with the world.

I tried to explain it all, but couldn't, she doesn't understand and we had a few blazing arguments - well she shouts and I just stand there in silence. Shocked and unable to string a sentence together never mind defend myself.

Haven't seen her since the weekend but I know it's over.

Not sure what else to write, not even sure what I want any more. Not sure what to do or where to even start.

There is no point as I just end up back here again - alone and scared. Maybe I am better off alone rather than male other people miserable as well.

It is my curse in this life......

Stevie_Palimo

As easy as it is to say here things will pick up and stuff happens for a reason, If you are on medication make sure you stick with it and as for feeling alone is there anything you like to do.


Maybe look at groups of some sort or day's out with any good family or friends that you get on with, Also speak to them about how you feel also as it is not good bottling these things up.


Life will get better and you just need to pick yourself up and dust yourself off and look to the future.

quantumleap

Robinson_Crusoe wrote: »

I don't know what to do anymore....

I posted over a year ago here and, until recently, things had been going well....

Now, my depression is back and is deeper than ever before. I am back on medication and struggling with the world.

I tried to explain it all, but couldn't, she doesn't understand and we had a few blazing arguments - well she shouts and I just stand there in silence. Shocked and unable to string a sentence together never mind defend myself.

Haven't seen her since the weekend but I know it's over.

Not sure what else to write, not even sure what I want any more. Not sure what to do or where to even start.

There is no point as I just end up back here again - alone and scared. Maybe I am better off alone rather than male other people miserable as well.

It is my curse in this life......

You say you are "back" on medication. That suggests you were off it. Did you stop taking your medication? Could that be one of the reasons why you've begun to struggle again?

Don't assume its over. Of course she is struggling to cope - this is a difficult situation for you both. Particularly when you are finding it hard to articulate what it is you feel. Perhaps, show her your opening post?

purpleshoes_2

Are you talking about your ex wife when you mean she, your previous thread spoke about leaving a long marriage, or have you been in a relationship with someone new.

Robinson_Crusoe_2

quantumleap wrote: »

You say you are "back" on medication. That suggests you were off it...

Have been off meds since 2008ish

quantumleap wrote: »

Don't assume its over. Of course she is struggling to cope - this is a difficult situation for you both. Particularly when you are finding it hard to articulate what it is you feel. Perhaps, show her your opening post?

No... it's over... I just need to accept it I suppose

purpleshoes wrote: »

Are you talking about your ex wife when you mean she, your previous thread spoke about leaving a long marriage, or have you been in a relationship with someone new.

Not my ex-wife - that is long over. Even my kids don't speak to me these days

I tried a relationship, gave it everything I had to make it work and it's left me a broken man...

marisco_2

Robinson_Crusoe wrote: »

Now, my depression is back and is deeper than ever before. I am back on medication and struggling with the world.

I tried to explain it all, but couldn't, she doesn't understand and we had a few blazing arguments - well she shouts and I just stand there in silence. Shocked and unable to string a sentence together never mind defend myself.

In all honesty I would see it as a positive not a negative that your relationship has come to an end. Granted it is not easy to be the partner of someone who suffers from depression. That said though nothing justifies a person losing it, to the degree that the one closest to them is left feeling shocked and unable to even formulate a sentence. Most people conduct themselves with integrity, and can show empathy to another, and not stoop so low.

You have taken a big step forward by contacting your gp and arranging to take medication. If after giving some time for this to settle in your system, it seems as if there is no overall improvement, consider asking for it to be adjusted or changed.