Tricky Question re MIL Will

rayday2

Not sure this is the right board and apologies for the long post.

My MIL is a widow she lives with her daughter (hubbys sister!) - daughter does not pay a penny board despite being 31 and in a professional job.

MIL took a remortgage on family home when FIL died, she then ran up cards etc and bailed daughter out of a bad house purchase. Daughter then bought another house had no money for setting up MIL bailed her out again - daughter sold house 6 months later deciding she could nto afford a home made 10k profit and never gave a penny to MIL.

MIL had so many debts she decided to sell up and get rid of mortgages she down sized to a two bedroom house two years ago. Daughter moved with her and encouraged MIL to kit the whole house out in brand new furniture. MIL ran more cards up took a loan out and then re ran the cards back up.

MIL then decided to do equity release (against our advice but sister would not pay any board or help so she decided it was the only option. We begged her to pay something and she said the most she could do was £5 a month as she does not want to ruin her credit history in case she wants a mortgage she is over committed on cards, car finnace and loans too!)

Well MIL could not get enough money from equity release to pay everything off she got a lump sum, had to sign to say daughter would move out the house on her death so we think this company now own the house officiially. Thing is the money left over that was not enough to pay loans off is burning a hole in her pocket she is spending it and the cards are still there not cancelled. We have again begged her not to keep them asked her to get board out of sister and been told "she is not going to be dictated too!!"

Thing is if his mum was to die (sounds awful!) and she owes a lot on cards etc would we have to pay the debts - we just can't do that we have never taken a penny off her. Sister has had 20k deposit for her first house and subsequant monthly financial help and food etc. SHe has a will in place that divides everything 50-50 does that include debt?

If it does is there anyway we can ask her as the one thing she can to get a proper will done and write us out of it so that there are no financial comebacks? I know its a risk we could miss out on some money but I fear MIL and daughter are not learning any lessons and there just will be a pile of debt left that to be nasty we have not benefited from at all! We even skip birthdays etc tell her not to bother.

Sorry if this is insenstive or in the wrong place but it is a huge genuine worry to us.

paddy's_mum

As I understand it, legitimate debts are taken out of the amount of money left 'in the pot' as it were by your MIL, upon her death. No matter what the will says, if there is no money left over once the debts are cleared, then not a penny will go to the heirs. Equally, the people to whom the debts are owed cannot come to you to settle the arrears/outstanding amounts. You are not the debtor and there is no comeback of any kind on you assuming that you or your hubby have never stood as guarantor for any of these loans or credit card agreements.

I can sympathise with your fears but in your shoes, I would just close my eyes to the stupidity of the mother and her daughter (who seem tarred with the same irresponsible brush) and let life tick on without your input. Keep saving/spending sensibly as you are, and don't worry about missing out on some money in the future.

I would also advise that you suggest to your husband not to agree to being appointed executor of his mother's will. He will almost certainly have a nightmare situation to deal with at some time and it seems only fair to me that the greedy, grasping, insensitive, daughter ought to be the one to pick up the pieces when the time comes.

margaretclare

No, you're not obliged to pay MIL's debts on her death. Same applies to anyone - you're not obliged to pay debts of another person, end of story. Only if you had joint commitments e.g. joint house ownership, joint bank accounts, then the survivor is responsible for 100% of what's left.

It would be a good idea to get proper legal advice on this. It sounds as if there might not be enough left to get 50/50 of! MIL's debts have to be paid out of her estate first, so it sounds as if the equity release provider will have 'first charge' and then the credit card providers will be forming an orderly queue. It sounds from what you say that there won't be a thing left, either for you or for daughter! And daughter will then have to stand on her own feet for once, something she hasn't had much experience of doing! Of course, daughter's debts are daughter's, unless she has any joint debts with MIL, in which case those debts become hers. Not yours!

HTH

Margaret

PS: I would agree with the above - on no account allow your husband to be involved, by becoming executor, or in any shape or form whatsoever!

rayday2

Sorry to sound thick here very worrying.

So after all the the estate is dealt with what happens if there is still lenders that need paying do they just give in?

Last thing we want is people chasing us you can guarantee his sister will bury her head, and we are struggling so hard to get debt free and reducing our mortgage that this would slap us in the face to pay for there lifestyle!

rayday2

Sorry I meant to thank you too, I appreciate this is a very sensitive topic.

dzug

rayday2 wrote: »

Sorry to sound thick here very worrying.

So after all the the estate is dealt with what happens if there is still lenders that need paying do they just give in?

Last thing we want is people chasing us you can guarantee his sister will bury her head, and we are struggling so hard to get debt free and reducing our mortgage that this would slap us in the face to pay for there lifestyle!

Well they SHOULD just give in but I have no doubt some of them will try it on. You just have to tell them where to get off.

rayday2

And could that effect my credit rating or is it just last ditched attempts by finance companies to get more money?

margaretclare

rayday2 wrote: »

And could that affect my credit rating or is it just last ditched attempts by finance companies to get more money?

No, it won't affect your credit rating at all. The only way your credit rating can be affected is if you default on your debts, and as long as you have no 'financial association' with MIL, it won't affect you.

A good reason for you or your husband not to become executors is that you'd then have to deal with the lenders, who might not get back what they're owed. I've heard that sometimes they do 'try it on', assuming you don't know your rights, emotional blackmail, that kind of thing.

Stay well clear!

HTH

Margaret

rayday2

Thank you so much for all your help.

We have no ties with them at all, the house they are in now my hubby has never lived in and all the financial products he had at that address are now paid up and gone so I don't think we are even linked financially now he left over 5 years ago.

Many thanks again it does mean a lot to us because she won't talk to us about things financial it just makes our worries increase further. We get on she is always ringing when she needs something, we had to get her out of a bad deal on a patio door that she signed upto so we are good to help out but have to butt out the rest of the time.