How To Stop Spending?

moohound

FireWyrm wrote: »

Or...

The practice of buying stuff you dont need with money you dont have to impress people you dont like and who dont even know you exist.

Makes total sense.

I think this is especially true of cars, and why particularly younger men dig themselves in a hole for car loans.

I am not being sexist, read the loans board, for the number of young men who buy 10K+ cars on finance and regret in under a year, some in under a month, its not about transport its about ego.

KONG

Some years ago I had alot of time in my hand and when you are bored you easy look at the shops and say: Ah, this is nice - I should buy it.

Later on I got an second job and have alot on my hand with work, doing the cleaning and the normal tasks you have in your daily life. So when I finally have time after work, cooking etc. the clock is so late and I am so exhausted that I dont care about looking at it unless I really need it.

But when I finally have time on vacation or a weekend then I might buy some stuff but it only happens few times a year so I actually save more than I use.

Flutterby83

I've been reading this thread with great interest as I am the same with impulse shopping, which is why I got myself into a whole load of debt in the first place! However, over the last couple of months I've managed to clear my next account (which my other half now has the card for and changed the password to my online account so I can't access it but if I want something from there, I can, the only catch being I have to wait a week from seeing it to buying it - his idea!) my overdraft (account now closed) and a credit card (same rules as my next account) and seeing the balances come down was so much better than seeing them going up!! I used to be very materialistic, especially with new clothes as I have/had body image issues, however I know my other half loves me the way I am which has kerbed my spending a lot as I don't feel the need to 'prove' anything anymore. I went cold turkey, no shopping unless it was an essential food shop, no browsing the internet, nothing, it was hard but I knit and crochet and have a huge collection of yarn I decided I was going to knock a dent in so I could by more (an excuse to shop!) but I found after about a month, I didn't have the need to buy cr*p anymore and I was proud of what I'd put my time into making rather than just buying and lining someone else's pocket! I had an impulse to go shopping today so I used it wisely - took the Christmas money I'd saved (cold hard cash, no less) and went to get a few presents, I found myself bored after 10 minutes and just wanting to go home. I was once told it takes 28 days to make or break a habit, not sure how true that is though sorry for the ramble!

its_maths_not_magic

There have been a lot of good suggestions, here are some things that have worked for me:

1. Stop watching TV. This sounds weird I know, but advertising exists solely to make you dissatisfied with your life. It does its best to make you feel ugly, old, fat, poor, unwanted so you will buy their product which will make you feel beautiful, young, slim, rich and wanted. The more you are exposed to advertising, the more you are going to spend. I stream any tellie I want to watch, and there is a heap of stuff on youtube on any subject you can think of. Not watching advertising means, for example, that I only own three pairs of shoes and that's fine by me (I can only wear one pair at a time anyway).

2. Work on anxiety levels. I have an anxiety disorder and sometimes I would spend just to relieve anxiety. Instead now I allow myself to feel the anxiety, which, ironically makes the anxiety a lot more subdued. I also meditate and practise mindfullness.

3. Realising that money is in fact very important to keep. Most people see money as a token for buying stuff with. A great change of attitude (from mr money moustache) is to view money as a way to make more money. For instance, I wonder how rich I would be today if I taken every pound I spent on vodka and invested it in shares of an alcohol company...

4. Take up more interesting hobbies than shopping. I play guitar and do art, both of which cost me almost nothing. There are so many things to do out there which make your life richer that cost nothing.

PlymouthMaid

Sometimes if I cannot resist the urge to look at new clothes (which was one of my bad habits years ago) I go to a website and bung everything I like in cyber shopping basket. Then I look at the potential order and the potential cost and realise how not worth it the goods are and then delete the lot. If anything at all is still calling to me then it does sit there for a week or two to see if the need/urge passes. This method also means that anything which makes it through the process is treasured even though I only buy clothes which I can wear for work anyway.

moohound

Flutterby83 wrote: »

I've been reading this thread with great interest as I am the same with impulse shopping, which is why I got myself into a whole load of debt in the first place! However, over the last couple of months I've managed to clear my next account (which my other half now has the card for and changed the password to my online account so I can't access it but if I want something from there, I can, the only catch being I have to wait a week from seeing it to buying it - his idea!) my overdraft (account now closed) and a credit card (same rules as my next account) and seeing the balances come down was so much better than seeing them going up!! I used to be very materialistic, especially with new clothes as I have/had body image issues, however I know my other half loves me the way I am which has kerbed my spending a lot as I don't feel the need to 'prove' anything anymore. I went cold turkey, no shopping unless it was an essential food shop, no browsing the internet, nothing, it was hard but I knit and crochet and have a huge collection of yarn I decided I was going to knock a dent in so I could by more (an excuse to shop!) but I found after about a month, I didn't have the need to buy cr*p anymore and I was proud of what I'd put my time into making rather than just buying and lining someone else's pocket! I had an impulse to go shopping today so I used it wisely - took the Christmas money I'd saved (cold hard cash, no less) and went to get a few presents, I found myself bored after 10 minutes and just wanting to go home. I was once told it takes 28 days to make or break a habit, not sure how true that is though sorry for the ramble!

I found myself stuck in a shop recently, we were waiting 1 hour for a watch battery to be fitted so we went in a big department store, and I was bored as well, I knew i didn't need anything so struggled to spin the time out, in the past I would have come out with high end make up and accessories just for the sake of it.

dimestorediamond

xbethanyx wrote: »

thank you so much for all your replies and being so kind... I was just getting really out of control and now have vet bills to pay and getting further into debt so I have to give myself a good shake! For example last month I really wanted a new house phone (don't need one as barely use the one I had) but i sat for ages online choosing one then wanted it straight away so went to the shops and bought it at like 8pm So bad!!

Try not buying it straight away, and tell yourself you have to wait X amount of days - maybe start with two and extend to a week? You aren't saying you cannot have it, you just have to WAIT. Usually find by the time that passes, you don't care anymore!

maria3104

I read Gail Vaz Oxlade, or watch her on you tube, or alvin hall whenever i feel I need rebooting. And of course martin Lewis the main money man.

GettingOrganised

PlymouthMaid wrote: »

Sometimes if I cannot resist the urge to look at new clothes (which was one of my bad habits years ago) I go to a website and bung everything I like in cyber shopping basket. Then I look at the potential order and the potential cost and realise how not worth it the goods are and then delete the lot. If anything at all is still calling to me then it does sit there for a week or two to see if the need/urge passes. This method also means that anything which makes it through the process is treasured even though I only buy clothes which I can wear for work anyway.

I do this too - over the last year I would continue to go onto clothes website and fill the basket up and then not complete. It gives me the buying buzz without spending money. I don't do this now as much as I used to - which I think is a good sign.

I really enjoy shopping around (virtually) for good deals and this in turn means it can take a few days to actually purchase anything and sometimes I just don't bother in the end.

However, I really think I could slip straight back into it, if I had the funds. Hopefully, the appeal will reduce over time...

zenshi

liuhutOz wrote: »

I associate what I buy with how many hours I have to work to earn the cash to buy it. It seems daft that I have to work for two hours to pay for a takeaway just because Im too tired to cook after work

When I first started my dog grooming business, my kids were young. They were often getting sniggers in the shops when pestering me for an item.....they would say ' but it only costs 1 dog' :rotfl: