Divorce advice anyone?

Angela84

So, im trying to work out where to start. Does anyone have any advice. I will try to be as clear and consise as possible:

2 houses in his name: equity around 40k in each at a guess. Bought with his inheritances, I put 20k family money in a coupld of years ago to do kitchen.
No savings or pension
Debts of around 10k between us
Neither of use would qualify for a new mortgage.
I had 1 son already, we have had 2 together and due a 4th in a few weeks
I left and rented a house in June. He has paid me £300 a month. CSA calculator says should be around £450. First son's father pays £150.

He's extremely tight, and would happily be as sneaky as possible to ensure I get nothing.
Seen a mediator and have been advised I should be awarded the family home. I am scared when he finds this out he will do everything in his power to make this not happen.

Scared. Especially as I'm going to have to be around him and his family when baby arrives next month.

DUTR

It's not up to the mediator though, see a solicitor to get the legal not moral standing on it.
Many NRP do not mind paying CS payments, £ for £ some are actually paying less that way.
You say there is equity in the house, which suggests there is still a mortgage to be paid .
Having the children isn't a license to milk , there is a lot of homework to be done , good luck.

Morglin

See a solicitor, and find out what both of your rights and responsibilities are.

A mediator is not the best person to advise you, and you need to protect yourself and the children.

Lin

TBagpuss

See a solicitor. If you have not already done so, register a matrimonial homes rights notice against the family home, and a unilateral notice against the second property.

Get the solicitor to write to him asking him to pay the CSA rate in maintenance and if he will not, apply to the CSA - they don't back date payments.

Could you afford the mortgage payments on the house? A court would look at needs, including the needs for you and children, and him and the children to have somewhere to live. It would be unusual to require him to pay the mortgage on a house you were living in, so it is relatively unlikely that you would get the house if you cannot afford to run it. Obviously how much he pays in maintenance will effect what you can afford, and if you have very young children spousal maintenance may be appropriate short term, in addition to child support, depending on his income and affordability.

Look for a solicitor who is a member of 'Resolution'

RAS

Please also check www.turn2us.org.uk as you may well be entitled to Morrtgage Interest Allowance to pay some of the mortgage now and then use the maintenance towards the capital.

And see a solicitor urgently.

Angela84

Thank you for all the advice guys. So I really need to see a solicitor it seems. I was put off as they told me their fees, and then explained a mediator could advise me just the same. Seems I've got the wrong end of the stick though.
Printing those land registry forms now to make sure he doesn't quickly try to sell the houses.
I think I'm going to have to sell my car to raise the money for the solicitor.

RAS

Hi

You do not need a solicitor for the divorce.

You do need to see a mediator.

However going to see a mediator when you have no idea of your legal rights is a bad idea. One poster on the buying and selling forum had:

1. Ignored the value of a property elsewhere in Europe solely in her husband's name.

2. Paid him half the equity in the English property when the courts would have almost certainly awarded him less and delayed payment until the youngest was 18/left school.

3. Still had the property in England she occupied and on which she paid the mortgage as a joint tenancy which meant that if she died he was the sole survivor.

4. Had made a will leaving the house to her sons despite the fact it was not part of her estate.

And was not receiving maintenance as he was outside the UK.

She did this because she could not afford a lawyer.

I_try

Have a look on the wikivorce site also as there is a lot of information on there. Get as much information together as you can before going to see a solicitor to make the most of your time. The more leg work you are able to do the less they need to! In the long-run it can be an expense that is well worth it.


Remember he may have bank accounts and assets that you know nothing about, be careful making assumptions.


The courts will be more than used to people that do their best to prevent their partners getting anything. Get good advise and support, do as much of the paperwork as you are able and get as much information together and organised as you can. Wikivorce is extremely helpful though :-)


Keep strong, good luck and best wishes to you and your children.

simpywimpy

Im using the brethertons fixed price package from the wikivorce site. Rather slow going but worth the money. Quotes from solicitors locally were ridiculous - thousands if contested which it sounds like yours may be

Angela84

Thank you for the advice, I will look on the wikivorce site right now! I suppose I jumped the gun as I saw one solicitor, she explained her fees and scared the life out of me. All this billing per 6 minutes stuff, and without contesting she put an approx figure of 5k.

RAS

As said, do the divorce yourself.

However for the finances you need advice about what you can reasonably expect.

You may or may not actually need a solicitor to get that out of him but you will start in a poor negiotiating position if you do nto even know your likely entitlement.