Wording of the petition + property

tomtontom

If you are legit, have you thought about seeing a therapist? Your reluctance to let go of your (to be ex) wife is a little scary.

CP26

At the minute it is simply a tick box saying that the petitioner would like the respondent to pay.

The very basic logic being that the respondents unreasonable behaviour has led to the divorce so they should bear the costs. If you were doing the 2 year separated with consent divorce instead for example it would probably be more normal that you'd each pay for your own costs, or if you did it DIY that you'd split the cost of the court fee by your own agreement / negotiation.

With my ex I was the petitioner and I did not ask him to pay anything for the divorce. I felt it was unfair on my ex to expect him to pay for the lot. We discussed it and I agreed to pay for the divorce and he agreed to pay all the costs associated with getting the house sorted out so we found our own compromise.

The court will still have to rule that the respondent should pay at the end of the process - it's not guaranteed just because she's ticked the box. If you get your own solicitor involved they may be able to advise you on whether you can challenge costs, they'll also be able to tell you whether it's worth contesting or trying to prove that you're still acting as a couple.

PaulAA_2

Mojisola wrote: »

You're paying for a solicitor who is trying to get the best deal for your wife and will also be paying for a solicitor for yourself?

You don't want the divorce - why are you going along with this? If your wife wants the divorce, let her be honest and say so in the paperwork.

You are making perfect sense, but her petition is on the way to the court. How can I make her or her solicitors change that letter?

I will need to speak with a good solicitor - If you have a better idea I am all ears.

I understand that many straightforward cases are done either DIY or fixed fee services, relatively low-cost. When asked why use expensive solicitors to fill out a simple form that does not influence the split of assets the answer was because I want to.

I don't understand, and I feel I am a pawn in a sophisticated game. Oh well.

Errata

PaulAA wrote: »

You are making perfect sense, but her petition is on the way to the court. How can I make her or her solicitors change that letter?

I will need to speak with a good solicitor - If you have a better idea I am all ears.

I understand that many straightforward cases are done either DIY or fixed fee services, relatively low-cost. When asked why use expensive solicitors to fill out a simple form that does not influence the split of assets the answer was because I want to.

I don't understand, and I feel I am a pawn in a sophisticated game. Oh well.

What letter?

Pollycat

PaulAA wrote: »

What kind of legal expert should I google for and is it for both of us or just myself? I get the feeling she does not exactly know what she wants, but her lawyers are giving her a lot of random thoughts that would only result in more fees.

Stop Googling.

Start asking round if anyone can recommend a good solicitor in your area.
Some do free 30 minute sessions.
If you can find one, you will need to be very organised and ask the most important questions first.

You need a solicitor for you.
She already has one.

I think you've got there.

PaulAA wrote: »

I will need to speak with a good solicitor

Do it - face-to-face if possible.

PaulAA_2

tomtontom wrote: »

If you are legit, have you thought about seeing a therapist? Your reluctance to let go of your (to be ex) wife is a little scary.

I think you may have nailed it. I feel she is just after my money after all.

Someone has mentioned on another thread that it is important to understand the other person motives. The more time passes the less I understand. All this staying together and spending time together and living as before and nevertheless proceeding with divorce just makes no sense.

Strange things have started to happen, and my trust to her is dissolving fast.

OK, about her solicitors. I wrote to them saying a part of the petition was incorrect. I havent had a response yet. Do they have the right to ignore my request and send the petition without changes?

Errata

PaulAA wrote: »

OK, about her solicitors. I wrote to them saying a part of the petition was incorrect. I havent had a response yet. Do they have the right to ignore my request and send the petition without changes?

Yes! Argue the toss in front of a judge, or employ your own solicitor to argue the toss for you.

purpleshoes_2

This thread is worrying. Fixated on one aspect of a letter and only responds to people who tell him what he wants to hear.

Sorry you are going through this but get proper legal advice and step away from the pc for a bit. 4 threads on more or less the same topic is a bit unnecessary.