Am I liable to pay my ex boyfriends credit card...

January20

You have paid what you believe you owed.
They want more money but won't provide you with a statement to show why they believe you owe more.
In your position, I would refuse to pay any more unless they provided a statement to prove you owe more, which is probably because they know deep down that you don't owe that money.

If they continue harassing you, send a letter to warn them to back off. Use a solicitor if necessary. Do no let them bully you into paying money you don't owe them. And whatever anybody else says, here or in real life, you do not legally owe them anything.

This is a good lesson for the parents about whether or not to pay their son's credit card bill in future and it's a good lesson for him (and them) to learn that if it's got his name on it, it's his responsibility!

sulphate

Admo10 wrote: »

I feel that I've been perfectly reasonable in the situation.
I have requested that they send me a copy of a statement so if there is a purchase that I overlooked I would pay the difference. They havent done so.
I just resent feeling bullied into paying the total debt. It got to the point where they were asking to meet me outside my work place to collect money from me. I stated that this was harrassment and said that I would contact the police if it continued.
I just want the nightmare to be over.

I think the OP is being perfectly reasonable. She believes she has paid what she owes - half of general living expenses that she & her ex accrued whilst living together. However as the card was in her ex's name she believes he has used it for other things. As she has no access to the statement, she cannot categorically state something like "the balance was £1400, the joint expenses were £1000 so I have paid £500, the remaining £400 is my ex's expenditure on clothes/other luxury items I had nothing to do with"

Sounds like the ex boyfriend is telling Mummy and Daddy that the OP owes more than she has paid.

OP, if you eventually receive the statement then re-evaluate, but as you haven't got this, do not be pressurised into paying more of the debt if you believe it to be unfair.

Admo10

I feel that his mother paying was an admition that the majority of the debt was his. She paid it on the basis that she could try and bully the money out of me clearly.

j.e.j.

Admo10 wrote: »

I feel that his mother paying was an admition that the majority of the debt was his. She paid it on the basis that she could try and bully the money out of me clearly.

Speak to your solicitor about an anti-harassment order?

DigForVictory

+1 for instructing your solicitor to advise the lady that if she wishes any money or any more of your time, she can have it in court & that all future communications had better be in writing rather than text/ phone / email/ person or you'll start proceedings for harassment. (I do hope your solicitor has a log of the contacts & hassles to date?)

I absolutely get this is worrying, but solicitors are almost as expensive as paying the whole darn card so it makes sense to manoeuvre the lady into a put up or shut up.

As for going to court - locate your local courthouse, go in & have a look around. The clerks are usually very supportive & helpful. (Talk to someone who fought their PPI claim to a court date! Magistrates are *human*.)

mgdavid

Admo10 wrote: »

I agreed to pay what I owed but I've never signed anything or agreed to pay half.

Then you don't have a problem, so try not to worry!
As others have said, if they harass you any more, go straight to the police. If it gets as far as small claims court I suspect they would be laughed out in short order.

lee111s

Just tell them you owe nothing and wait for the court letter.

sinizterguy

19lottie82 wrote: »

Its in his name, so his debt, his responsibilty. Some will say if he used it for joint expenses you have a moral responsibilty to pay some of the debt but you believe you have done that, tell him to get lost.

This. As far as the debt goes.

If you made an agreement with your boyfriend to pay him back some money, etc, then that's between you and him.

bargainbetty

It might be the time to put something in writing to them. Formally state that you have paid what you consider to be a fair and reasonable amount towards the bills incurred by any shared expenses, and that until such time as they provide a copy of the credit card statement detailing what other expenses they consider to be your responsibility then you consider the matter closed.

Further communication will only be acceptable in writing, and any calls, texts or emails will be considered harassment. Threats to turn up at your home, work or any other location will also be considered harassment and will be reported to the police as such.

Make it clear that you won't accept anything else from them.

His card, his debt. Her problem.

pogofish

it sounds like you have done the right thing and need to do no more.

When I split-up, on the basis of recipts/statements I could use as proof (she got a copy), I agreed a sum amicably with my ex to cover her share of outstanding debts and she paid it over a few months by bank transfer soon after her payday and that was the end of it. No argument, no fuss and no reason to be dipping back in and out of each other's lives. Constant contact/demands over money is TBH a recognised abuse/controlling tactic.

So challenge her directly again - by letter or email if you can (keep proof of postage/copies), to demonstrate the total amount owed for a full and final settlement - if she can't, tell her your goodwill has run-out and to take a hike!