WaS's bioethics discussion thread. Warning - penguins ahead!

meritaten

waves - I can only think that what was done then was 'right at the time'. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. Foster care could have been totally wrong for you. and institutional care, I think, could have been a disaster.
you may have been extremely lucky and got wonderful foster parents. or - got people only in it for the money. I tend to think that our path in life is for a reason and makes us the people we are today. and you sound reasoned and balanced and a lovely person - so perhaps the decision was the right one?

Waves_and_Smiles

I am so sorry to hear about your problems with infertility, pukkamum. Of course that would cloud the issue for you, that is such an emotive subject. I can understand Julie's guilt as well, for her mother to die so soon afterwards is heartbreaking, plus her mother must have had a huge control over her even for her to go ahead with the abortion.

Please don't blame yourself, it would have been almost impossible for you to have made a decision not based on emotion under those circumstances, I don;t think I could have put my own feelings aside in the same circumstances.

The hardest thing about ethical/moral decisions seems to be able to step back from them to see things from a logical standpoint. I wonder if we as humans are even capable of that fully? A therapist told me once that we never do anything that we do not get something out of, that even the kindest decisions give us something in return even if it is a feeling of self-worth. We are a species largely driven by our feelings and I think that perhaps even when we feel that we are able to stand back and view something logically that our own emotional drives are still present to an extent.

Waves_and_Smiles

Awww, thank you meritaten, what a lovely thing to say. I do know that the second time I was taken into care I no longer had the guilt because at that point my mother had tried to stab me. Now, that certainly wasn't ideal but it proved to me that the situation was so extreme that no one could have stayed with her. Before that I always had doubt that perhaps if I was a little kinder, a little more helpful and generally a better person that I could have made her better. By allowing me to return and realise that wasn't the case they absolved me of self-blame so perhaps it was the correct decision.

jobbingmusician

pukkamum, you remind me of a story someone told me in the 70's. (Aah, a different time!)

We'd been on a week's meditation retreat together and on the way home she was subject to road rage from another driver, who screamed at her. She was still 'blissed out' from the week, and said to the other driver 'you seem really upset' and gave her a hug. The other woman burst into tears and was really nice!

Sounds as if your Julie might like a hug, too....... (Ha ha really ethical on this thread!)

Waves_and_Smiles

On a completely different subject I discovered on my course that pharmacists do not have to honour contraception or emergency contraception prescriptions if it is against their beliefs. I had no idea that they had that choice. I know they can refuse to sell OTC opiate medications but never knew that they can refuse an actual prescription.

System

Waves_and_Smiles wrote: »

On a completely different subject I discovered on my course that pharmacists do not have to honour contraception or emergency contraception prescriptions if it is against their beliefs. I had no idea that they had that choice. I know they can refuse to sell OTC opiate medications but never knew that they can refuse an actual prescription.

There was a case recently ish close to me where a pharmacist refused to give contraception on ground of her belief.

Whist i do respect others beliefs, i feel if you are doing a particular job and that requires you give out contraception, you should do that job.

I remember my mum telling me that many moons ago when she first wanted to go on the pill, the doctor asked her if she was married. She aid no and he refused to give her the pill. :eek: i'd have hoped we have moved on from that these days.

lostinrates

xXMessedUpXx wrote: »

There was a case recently ish close to me where a pharmacist refused to give contraception on ground of her belief.

Whist i do respect others beliefs, i feel if you are doing a particular job and that requires you give out contraception, you should do that job.

I remember my mum telling me that many moons ago when she first wanted to go on the pill, the doctor asked her if she was married. She aid no and he refused to give her the pill. :eek: i'd have hoped we have moved on from that these days.

Particularly as some contraception is prescribed medicinally, e.g for regulation of PCOS.

whitewing

I don't know if this is true or not, but I read online that in Ireland, where abortion is illegal, doctors will only fit a coil during a period so they can't accidentally induce a period. I had never considered that before.