Really need to clear my debts but debt charity cant help. What next?

Grumpelstiltskin

OP This paragraph from one of your earlier posts worries me.


Part of my issues surround the fact that I don't really understand money. I get a kind of blurry head feeing when I think about it. I'm going to start recording my expenditure again and see if that helps me understand where my money is going. I would really like to start paying things off now but I've no idea how to best go about it.


How do you expect to run a successful business if you don't understand money?


You must separate personal and business spends, you must keep some rudimentary accounts for your business otherwise you may find it isn't making money and you are subsidising it, something you can't afford to do.

Kate_fixing_it

Some brilliant advice already :T and well done for coming here and facimg up to tackling the debt.

Just one (non-financial) thought; no matter what you do you are going to feel guilty about something in relation to the children. I'm sure that labour activates some "guilt gland". I can totally empathise with the way you are feeling about giving them everything you have and protecting them from the world but let them help you now. Get them involved in meal planning and grocery shopping, follow it up with a trip to the park on the way home. Make it a game - they can add up the total as you go and challenge yourselves to get in under budget, if they're anything like mine they'll enjoy the victory of "winning" the challenge more than expensive treats or days out. You will also be focused on a common task (getting the quality time together) and you'll be teaching them a valuable life lesson early on.

Kate x

Horseunderwater

The best thing you can do for your children is to say NO. I did this with mine from when she was a baby - it was the 1st word she understood. I also used to take her shoping with me to work out any savings, or do we need this really. Persuaded her that yogurt was same in the plain pots as in the ones with animals on. She agreed it was. Then she went back to school dinners. When I was a child - Mum got me one pair winter shoes & one pair sandles per year. Shoes were always fitted with growing room, I had one coat until I grew out of it or it fell apart. Mum made my school skirt, but then she was a very good seamstress. But that is how it was in the 70's. But I try to apply my parents ways to our current finances & it mostly works.

asparagus1968

hi,


stop the guilt thing with the children, what they need is love and stability, you don't buy those!


Kids am cinema, every weekend and daily in the school holidays, less than £2 a ticket. or get dvd from a charity shop/ebay, bag of pop corn, close the curtains and do a cinema evening at home!
parks/ beaches with a picnic
museums are free, check out local websites for what's on.
bike rides?


make one trip to town , stock up on cards and paper, those prices are just silly when you can't afford them, or decline invitations-choice is yours.


do you receive child support from ex?
why can't you get the rest of childrens clothes from ex? ( you don't need to answer here if personal, but give it a thought)


can you list the debts/minimums/apr separately please?


cut up the NEXT card ASAP !!!! in fact, chop them all up. Really hope you get the 0% one though:) (but once you have the deal, chop that one up too) no further spending on cards.


I think you are a little like me, the juggling messes up your head, what I did was get down to one current account, one savings account (which was an emergency/car costs/savings account really)
every Friday I withdrew a set amount from bank in cash for the week, and it HAD to last the week, and if that meant I had to turn down invites, or make a couple of cheapy meals, then that's what I did.


do you work as an employee as well as have the start-up business?if not, could you get a part time job for a while?
is there any grants you could get for the business?


have a look at the "fiscal fast" thread, its really good, and they are such a friendly bunch.


also, there is a thread where the OP (seasidegal, I think) kick started her budgeting by having a "scrimp" month, she literally went all-out to only spend on essentials for one month so she could have a fresh start.


hang in there, try and a simplify everything as much as poss, spend time and have fun with your children, not chuck money at them.
you sound like a lovely mum, that's what they will remember!

asparagus1968

kate_fixing_it
for some reason there isn't a thanks button on your post, but it is a great post, so thank you!

[Deleted User]

I can see a Thanks button on all the posts.

Well, apart from my own.

girlsmum

Do you get maintenance from the children's dad, or is it included in your income? also is your monthly rent only £167? again do you get help with this.
I am in the same situation, separated from my husband, and unfortunately my children have had to compromise, but they get the best i can give them, I have explained to them that i need to pay off some bills and told them that once those bills have been paid we can start to do some of the things they have been wanting to do, I feel mega guilty at times, but i do treat them when i can and they appreciate and enjoy it much more as they do not take it for granted. fun days out do not have to cost more than the petrol to and an ice cream, mind you last time the ice creams were so expensive so went to Tesco and got a box of Magnums which were on offer. some people might call me tight, i say i am careful.
As for children's savings i have not been able to add to it, but I will start once all my bills have been paid, as i will have the money to spare then
Good luck in sorting

BeingMe

Thank you everyone for the replies.

I'm not entirely up to speed with how to use this forum so will answer some of the questions off the top of my head. Btw, I can't see any 'thanks' buttons either but I do heartily thank you all for your help and advice.

I did the credit card checker thing someone linked to and it came out that I am 90% likely to be accepted so fingers crossed. I should find out in 5 days whether I've been accepted.

I work part time as an employee. It is a fixed term contract and I won't know until later this month whether I will be employed next year. Without the security of my salary, I couldn't afford to start up the business. I agree I need to get to grips with the finances for this though. I am calling my bank today about opening a business account or should I wait to find out about the credit card?

I will also do the snowball checker on the link posted to see when I can be realistically debt free.

Last month was unusual, I don't normally go on so many expensive days out. I receive £300 child support from my husband but nothing from my eldest's dad. The CSA are involved but he is self employed and refuses to pay.

The last things I put on credit were a bed for myself as I've spent the last 6 months on the floor and a new mattress for my eldest as his is falling to bits. I put both these items in to an interest free catalogue. I haven't spent on my credit cards or store cards for over a year now although I did put some things on to my next account for the house when I moved but I was desperate and had no money.

Part of my cash flow confusion is as a result of my benefits being messed up. I initially received full housing benefit, then they said I wasn't entitled and had been massively overpaid. My payments have only been reinstated last month and they changed again this month. It also meant I had a large amount of council tax to pay because they had paid me council tax reduction in error. I have always given them the correct information but they have made mistakes on my claim. I am hoping things will stabilise now and I can get to grips with my cash flow.

BeingMe

Yes, my stated income includes the child support I receive from my husband and my rent is what I have to pay after housing benefit is deducted. This is how SC calculated it. So far the amount of rent I have had to pay has changed each month due to them changing their minds on my entitlement so often.

BeingMe

Just gone through my debts and this is what I owe:

Capital one (30.34%) £1,701.80 - pay £100 a month, £40 above minimum payment
Barclaycard (29.9%) £660.80 - always minimum payment, around £16
Next (25.99%) £1,124.38 - minimum payment £114 last month but decreases each month in line with balance
Argos (29.9%) - £1,273.05 - minimum payment around £45
Dorothy Perkins (29.9%) - £334.30 - mp around £10
New look (28.9%) - £109.64 - minimum payment around £4
K and co (0%) - £1,328.48 - minimum payment was £168 last month but will be £75.76 this month (I returned some things since last statement)

Any advice on the order I should clear these debts would be great. Will try snow ball calculator now.