How we got through our redundancy

bromleymum

My husband faced redundancy a few years ago and I found this forum a real help reading the advice and feeling that this was something people could cope with so I would as well. As a ‘thanks’ to everyone who contributes at a really demanding time I thought I’d share some thoughts on my experience, not advice, just comments.

Firstly, I was totally unprepared for how much anxiety redundancy caused me. I’d always taken my husband’s job for granted and when I realised redundancy was a genuine prospect I totally over reacted - sleepless nights, frequent tears and constantly imagining the worse. Not only was this self obsession dragging me down, this actually put additional pressure on my husband who on top of his own concerns about his career was having to put up with me being a pessimist. I wish I could have behaved differently and regret it but it has given me an appreciation of the worry redundancy can cause and I hope I never behave that way again.

What didn’t help was the long lead in to my husband’s redundancy. For us we spent 18 months waiting and hoping the company would improve its finances. This included my husband cutting his wages, giving up his perks and putting in loads of hours. I’m not saying it’s easier if it happens overnight – but not knowing which way it would go was like picking over a wound again and again.

When the redundancy did actually happen, guess what – it was nowhere near as bad as the stress of not knowing. It happened, my husband was lucky to get a reasonable payment to keep us going for a few months, and that was that. Not being able to have what’s gone is a lot easier to deal with than months of will they, won’t they make me redundant.

Job-hunting is a job in itself. My husband spent the first couple of weeks creating a strong network of agency contacts and getting a real feel for the jobs out there. He quickly realised that restricting himself to the highest paying jobs in his career i.e matching the wages he’s been on, was going to be a harder ask that just seeing this as an opportunity for applying for those vacancies that really interested him.

After a couple of weeks he realised that searching beyond a couple of hours a day was not really worth it. If you look every morning you spot the new jobs straight away and then make the most of the rest of the day to do something you couldn’t do when tied down to a full time job.

Within a few weeks he was getting regular interviews and then a few months later got a job. It pays slightly less than the one he left but he prefers the work, the location and his colleagues. I have a much happier husband and now we’re actually glad the redundancy happened. Can’t believe I’m saying that. I know we’ve been lucky but most of my friends who have gone through redundancy (for non-medical reasons) now see it, with hindsight, as an opportunity although we all wish we could have been more positive at the time.

As for me it was the kick I needed to go back to work after being a stay at home mum and I managed to get a part time job as well.

I know I’ve rambled on but I hope this helps

lvm

I couldn't agree more with you - especially the bit about more worry over the will they, won't they than actually being made redundant.

I was in a position where my employer should have made me redundant at least 2 yrs ago as for the last 2/3 yrs I was working from home, doing about 20 hrs a MONTH and getting paid a full time wage. Every time I went to a meeting I was thinking "Is this it?".

I was finally given a nice little severance package last month and I start my new job end of this month. Although it's a lot lower paid, I'll actually be able to work with people and the money is still more than enough to live on. And even better, the last few yrs gave me the chance to save up a substantial amount so along with my redundancy/notice pay I'll be able to set my own business up later this year.

I would have been much more worried if I didn't have any savings to fall back on so it's so important everyone has some sort of safety net but I must admit - the fact it's finally over is a HUGE relief!!