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arrange marriage doc. gf hardly ever contacts me

skywalker123
skywalker123 Posts: 3 Newbie
edited 11 June 2014 at 10:45PM in Marriage, relationships & families
Hello,

So I have been kind of seeing a girl for the past few month (long distant) whom I was introduce to through a family friend. Its kind of an arrange marriage situation but not force marriage. So, we get to go out and get to know each other for a few months (or even a year or so) before we decide if we want to get married.

Comments

  • Tiglath
    Tiglath Posts: 3,816 Forumite
    Tenth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker Debt-free and Proud!
    Have you talked to her about all this? What does she say?
    "Save £12k in 2019" #120 - £100,699.57/£100,000
  • BitterAndTwisted
    BitterAndTwisted Posts: 22,492 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Do you have any idea of the sort of hours and shifts that doctors work?

    In any case, if you're not absolutely certain of her feelings towards you, you'd be extremely foolish to up sticks and move.
  • Bella73
    Bella73 Posts: 547 Forumite
    T be honest the fact that she is a doctor I find irrelevant, if you want to keep in contact with someone you do, end of...only job I can think if that would genuinely stop you apart from being an astronaught might be if you are in the forces and are not allowed to contact home for some reason, other than that it down to her not bothering.

    Doesn't sound like she is that into you or maybe she just isn't ready for the marriage bit yet even though her family might be.

    Think you need to be very straight with her and ask outright before you make any plans to move.
  • sharnad
    sharnad Posts: 9,904 Forumite
    Your giving up everyone to be with someone who can't be bothered to text you. Good luck with that one
    Needing to lose weight start date 26 December 2011 current loss 60 pound Down. Lots more to go to get into my size 6 jeans
  • whitewing
    whitewing Posts: 11,852 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Why don't you speak privately to one of the elders in the community - they must have experience of all types of situations.

    I wonder if she knows that you get along and knows that you will get married so is busy with her current life for the moment in a sort of take-the-situation-for-granted. I don't necessarily see it as a bad thing.
    :heartsmil When you find people who not only tolerate your quirks but celebrate them with glad cries of "Me too!" be sure to cherish them. Because these weirdos are your true family.
  • skywalker123
    skywalker123 Posts: 3 Newbie
    edited 11 June 2014 at 10:45PM
    i spoke to her about what she thought of our situation and our future and generally got a positive vibe.
  • thorsoak
    thorsoak Posts: 7,166 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    She has a busy, stressful job, working very long hours and will need to wind down after her shifts - so as long as you are still communicating, you may well be able to build this relationship. She certainly will not be able to reply immediately to trivial texts!

    Back off a bit, concentrate on your own career so that you both can contribute to the relationship you hope to have.
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