toddler with eating problems

laurz

my DS (17mnths) is so difficult at mealtimes.

typical day (infact everyday)
breakfst mullerrice, lunch crisps on a good day, tea soup (maybe 3 times a week he'll eat tea) one snack.
I've tried force feeding, tried this is your meal eat it or starve,feed your bl**dy self!
tried highchair. lets sit at the table and eat together etc etc
it's not like i've not done this before, my DD eats anything!

HHHHHHEEEEELLLLLLLLPPPPPPPP i'm at my wits end.

Health visitor is useless

AnnieH

Hi I just googled toddler eating problems and it came up with loads of great advice including this link
http://www.babycentre.co.uk/toddler/nutrition/howtocopefeedingproblems/

Hope it helps. My 2 year old hardly ever eats his tea, but he does eat his lunch, and he is just not hungry enough by the time 5 o'clock comes. I don't allow him to eat anything after lunch and sometimes he eats but mostly he picks at his tea, but he always has room for pudding LOL
The big thing is to not make it into a big deal, or it will give him a real complex about food.

bribri_2

Does your son have enough energy to get through the day and has a drink or two? If so, relax he is probably getting enough nutrients.
My children, almost 4 and 2 and a half, often seem to go a day or two on very little food. Yes it is frustrating but they are only being toddlers.

When you say that you have tried x, y or z, have you tried it consistently for a few days? Also is your son compensating with drinks which actually fill him up?

Unless there are some medical worries, in my experience it is best to ignore the non-eating, because it will only upset you, make mealtimes stressful and thus lead to further non-eating.

for my two, I sit down to eat with them. I let them play with the food and get messy so they feel comfortable with it but if they don't eat, I remind them it will go soon and then tidy up. If they get hungry later, there are no snacks.

As with all parenting, be consistent.

best wishes.
BB

laurz

he drinks a lot but my dd did too (had this checked out), i stop him from drinking about an hour before mealtimes.
I persevere for about a week when i decide on a new 'plan of action'

nickij_2

What does your son drink a lot of? You could make him milkshakes with added fruit eg strawberries/banana or smoothies using fruit juice and added fruits eg kiwi/banana if you're worried about vitamins or lack of calcium.
I would only offer water between meals, milk/milkshake after breakfast, lunch and supper and fruit juice/smoothie after tea.
What about crackers for lunch instead of crisps - they look similar, then add a few chunks of cheese/cucumber/apple?
Make sure your son sees you enjoying different foods - he may then want to try some.
I agree that you don't want food to become a battleground, but I also feel that as the parent we have to TRY to ensure our children have a healthy diet. My ys would often say ' I don't like that' but what he means is it's not his favourite. I always make sure there is something on their plates that they like plus things that aren't their 'favourite' and encourage them to eat as much of everything that they can, then they can have a bowl of fruit, then a yoghurt/hm cake etc. If they don't want their meal, they still have their fruit but no desert.
I hope this helps - don't want to sound preachy, but ys would have been very similar to your ds, but due to persevering he is not a fussy eater now, and it makes life much easier, and him a much healthier child.

Kimitatsu

I have two boys one who eats everything and one who was always a fussy eater!

First thing I would say if he is thriving then he is getting all he needs and dont worry too much. Once he starts to really eat then you will wonder why you ever worried!!

Have you thought about having him tested for food intolerances? I only ask because DS2 (the fussy one) has always had funny taste buds due to geographical tongue. Thankfully it was diagnosed at about 2 so I have always been a little more tolerant about what he eats, but then about 6 months ago I had a kinesiologist allergy test him (its none invasive and doesnt involve skin patches) and it turns out that he is intolerant to cows milk and a whole host of fruit, aome of which I knew already.

He still eats well but now we just modify his diet to ensure the the things that taste "funny" are not included. The alternative is to split his meals up so you are offering smaller portions at mealtimes just over a longer time and as the previous poster said only offer water between mealtimes.

Dont worry if he is an active healthy little boy and Good Luck x

jungliemac

My sons just turned 3 and lives on shreddies ,milk, pasta in tomato sauce, tinned spaghetti and on toast and occasionally a few chips.. Wont touch any meat and avoids veg like its poison. (I boil then mash carrotts and broccoli and mix it in his pasta sauce!!). He has unlimited energy from 5.30am until bedtime at 7pm. Hoping he will be more adventurous when he starts eating at pre school......lets face it, dont know many adults who eat only a handful of foods.so I'm sure all of our kids will turn out fine!

ailuro2

Don't force feed him, he will use it as a tool to get attention/make a point/wgatever.

I did...and I'm still getting over the force fed option at 37yo.;)

Put down stuff he likes in smaller quantities...don't worry too mcuh about it.Add a little big of something you're having, eat as normal, chat etc. and don't make a big fuss if he doesn't eat it.I always told DD if she didn't eat it all now then there would be no snacks before the next meal.We also had to cut back on her milk consumption as she would top up on milk and not eat her meals.Yoghurt and cheese made up for the lost milk, but she still had a pint a day.

Letting him help draw a face on the plate with food helps too..arranging grapes for eyes and grated carrot/cheese for hair can make it more fun. He may not eat it all, but the message that food is normal and something to be enjoyed will get there.

Our DD was awful unti lshe went to nursery,then school dinners- amazing what peer pressure can achieve at that young age:D . She still detests most veggies, but a bit of encouragement now she's older means she at least tried new stuff.

lofty_cherrytree

Hi there, my son is 5 and still has a limited diet and cannot even bear the smell of some foods (or watch other people eating if the mood takes him!) His luchbox at school is the same most days. He has energy and frankly whenever I mention it to HV or Dr they say not to worry too much, and we try not to but some days......! His eating problems all started at 18mths old when he had numerous ear infections and glue ear which affected his taste buds and was painful. His fussiness is a learned behaviour but over time we have added a few foods to his repertoire, which has required a lot of patience and no pressure. At 18mths I think he lived on gallons of diluted apple juice, raisins and marmite sandwiches, now he will eat roast lamb, sausages, fish fingers, cheese, pepperami (!), plain chicken, brocolli and sweetcorn (sometimes), bread/toast apples, grapes, raisins, raspberries and strawberries. He will not eat any 'wet' food or sauces, but needless to say cakes, biscuits and chocolate are never viewed with suspicion, surprise-surprise! Good luck though, it is hard and will get you down from time to time and will make you want to scream but there are lots of us out there. (My daughter of 16 has always eaten everything)

P.S. Forgot to say we have given him a multivitamin syrup off and on over the years, and chose one with iron as he was eating such a poor range of foods. It is an orange flavoured one which in fact he likes but could be mixed in with orange juice. Every time he's been on this his appetite has improved a little bit so may be worth a try. Good luck, but don't despair

jackomdj

My DD will eat most things (apart from raisins & cucumber!) but some days she won't eat a lot or becomes quite lazy & asks me to feed her. She is quite small for her age (3 at the end of Oct - so easy (ish) to reason with) & we have found a wonderful way of encouraging her to eat more....

We went to Paultons theme park which is aimed at 2 to 12 year olds (IMO) & some of the rides had a 90cm cut off which she was just under - so we tell her she has to eat lots more to help her grow & be able to go on more rides!!!

Nicky:j

Ishtar

My DD (now 2.5 years old) is naturally slim and it's been a struggle to keep her on a growth curve since she was about 4 months old - for the first 4 months she was happily tracking the 50th centile, but is now hovering somewhere between the 9th and 25th.

My health visitor was also useless - insisting I add cream, cheese and butter to DDs diet in order to put some fat on her (I was even threatened with referral to the paediatrician, even though there was nothing wrong). Honestly!

Anyway, to tackle the issues you're having, I wondered whether you had tried leaving plates of things around? I often found I could persuade my little one to eat if I did this - cheese on toast worked wonders, as did a few breadsticks, raisins, carrot sticks, etc, etc. I often pretended they were for me, but that I wasn't hungry so I'd 'leave it here and take it to the kitchen in a minute'.

We're currently working with a plate of 'picky bits' for lunch - she doesn't want sandwiches, or anything like that, but I found that if I present a colourful plate of 'bits' she eats the component parts of a sandwich separately, if you see what I mean! Currently she's having small carrot sticks, cubes of cucumber, sliced peppers, a slice of bread and some protein - sometimes cubed ham, or cheese (she's deeply suspicious of houmous, so that's a no-go!). Things cut into shapes work quite well too, even if its only bread. I've got quite a collection of small biscuit cutters now...

Its really disheartening when they refuse food - yesterday was a prime example, where she didn't want her dinner...then went on to eat loads of fruit! It's really hard not to be frustrated, but the main thing, as you know, is to keep trying different foods and one day they might just decide they like it . Obviously, don't make a big issue of it - I often just take the food away and say something like 'oh, not hungry today then?'.

She does get two snacks a day as her mealtimes are quite well spread out, so if she's not eaten a meal, then I can be sure she'll get something reasonably nutritious to keep her energy levels up.

Take care
D.