Your thoughts on university

Person_one

stebiz wrote: »

I don't think you'll find anywhere in my posts saying she was keen. I think you'll find she was keen to stay local and not go away. As for influencing her I don't believe I ever have.

The last update was that she was going to live in halls at a local uni, as I recall. What made her change her mind?

VJsmum

the increase in fees has meant less money for universities.

we no longer get govt funding.

many unis are now expanding overseas in orderm

my uni has courses in hong kong singapore and sri lanka
to boost income

stebiz

Person_one wrote: »

The last update was that she was going to live in halls at a local uni, as I recall. What made her change her mind?

When she went to a Grammar School she was expected to go to the 'very best' University and the pressure on her to do so, along with compulsory 5 Alevels, was just what she didn't want.

She moved to a College to finish her A levels and they are very much more relaxed. She's met some great friends who are all local and the last thing they talk about is moving away. This inbred attitude tends to be forced on kids in certain schools, much in the same way you say that I force my opinions on her.

So the latest is that she can do what she likes. Since seeing how stressed out she was under pressure from her last school over grades and you must consider Bath, Durham etc etc I've very much left it to her. If she wants to go then she's welcome to. If she wants to stay with her mix of friends that too is fine.

After years of drumming in to her how important education is and helping her achieve getting all A's and A*'s in her 14 GCSE'S I'm now more inclined to let her enjoy life and make those decisions herself. She is 18 now after all.

Person_one

stebiz wrote: »

I'm now more inclined to let her enjoy life and make those decisions herself. She is 18 now after all.

I'm really pleased to hear that stebiz, it's such a big turnaround from your previous threads, well done!

I hope she enjoys uni and makes tons of great friends, wherever she decides to live.

jenhug

poet123 wrote: »

That is a great story, you sound so proud of him, and quite rightly. Did he do the access course?

Hi, yes I am incredibly proud! His mother always used to say she couldn't see what I saw in him. Recently she said to me, "you always knew he was worth more, didn't you"?

He did do the access course, he got mainly distinctions, he was so disappointed when he got 1 question wrong in his final maths paper, it was his only incorrect answer for the whole year, and his tutor actually asked him if she could keep his work to show other students for the next year!

System

stebiz wrote: »

Are you saying that those who don't go to University don't achieve any of the above?

Well if my bf is anything to go by he certainly won't be learning to cook till he goes to uni :eek:

Likewise I didn't learn a lot of things till I went, but I think that's due to moving out more than it being exclusive to uni, but then I would never have moved out if I hadn't gone so it's swings and roundabouts.

I think if you move out through (not just for uni) you gain independence, and personally once I had it I never wanted to go back (unlike my sister who moved back home after uni)

TopQuark

Hello OP,

Just wanted to echo what others have said, regarding what the kids wish to do career-wise when older. I think this is the crux of whether a degree is necessary or not. That said, these days it seems as if having a degree is the new 'norm' and thus there is the worry that without one, you'll be at a disadvantage when entering the workforce. Therefore I think both you and they need to give it some serious thought.

I left university 10 years ago (first degree) and then went on to do a PhD in chemistry at one of the UK's best Russell group institutions. I now work for a leading international lab overseas. Most of the new recruits here have an MSc and/or PhD and we take the cream of the crop from across the continent. So if you want to work in research, then university is an absolute necessity.

Someone said something earlier in the thread that made me smile; about common sense, organisation and qualifications. I work with some of the brightest, most qualified people on the planet and their organisational skills are often sorely lacking. They spend all day deriving and proving complex equations but some of them couldn't organise a p**s-up in a brewery!

Good luck to you and your kids OP! (Oh and if any of them enjoy STEM subjects, encourage them as we need more young people in maths and sciences)

BunnieJ

Don't let your children feel pressured into going to uni.

I was always 'above average' at school, so it was pretty much drilled into me from a young age (about 13yrs old) that I would do my GCSEs/A-Levels and then go to uni. I even went on two summer school trips at Birmingham and Kent univeristy when I was in years 10 and 11.

My parents never went to uni, and they never pressured me to go. My school gave them the impression I was the perfect candidate for uni and made me believe it was the right path for me too.

I still keep in contact with the friends I made during that time and only two of them actually graduated! The rest either dropped out or didn't go to uni at all! :rotfl:

I chose my A-Levels poorly and got bad grades, limiting my choices of uni, so I went through clearing to get a place. I hadn't even considered staying at college to re-take my exams, finding an apprenticeship or getting a job. Everything was all about 'going to uni'.

I ended up doing two years on a course I didn't enjoy, failing my exams, moving back in with my parents, and how have a £15k student loan which I'm not likely to ever repay as I can't find a job with a decent salary! Employer's expect a degree level of education now, even for office admin roles!

If they really want to go to uni/need a degree for the career they want then encourage them. Don't try and tell them it's the be all and end all, there are other options! Now the fees have gone up they really need to be 100% sure they want/need to go to uni!

Unfortunately, by the time I quit uni it was too late for me to take up an apprenticeship, and I've had a string of unsuccessful jobs on minimum/near minimum wage. I regret everyday not finishing uni and now having no qualifications or chance of a decent job. Now the uni fees have gone up there's no way I could afford to go back!

Please make sure your children have all the possible pathways explained to them before they make a big decision they may come to regret!

TopQuark

Hey BunnieJ,

I was a bit sad to read your post, you sound like you have written yourself off. How old are you? It's a cliche but it's never too late to change your path.

Could you continue on with something you enjoy at the Open University? They have flexible payment options and you can study at your own pace, alongside a day job. You might be able to use the 2 years' worth of study you already have as credit towards an OU qualification.

Good luck,
TQ

BunnieJ

Hi TQ,

I have looked into the OU several times (whilst living at home with parents and now with my OH). I've gone to the open evenings, read through the prospectuses etc. but it's still out of my price range atm

My family aren't that supportive of me wanting to go back into education, as none of them did an FE. They always say things like, "You tried uni, it wasn't for you. You need to get a job and grow up" (not those exact words, but you get what I mean).

I know I'm only 25, so plenty of time to go back and study, but I just don't know how I would fund myself *sigh*

Also, I have no credits from previous study as I failed everything and got kicked out!