Feeling very down and fed up

Toomuchdebt

Just noticed my tax credits have gone down by £20 a week...that's £80 a month, and also my income support is being reduced by £22.96 a week until the 6th May for a social fund payment-I wouldn't mind except I was already paying them £40 a month as that was all I could afford...so for April I am going to be £170 down and from 6th May onwards £80 down
This repaying debt is hard enough without even less money coming in I'm so sick of saying no to the kids even for small treats
It's the car that's cripping me...£180 a month plus £50 a week on diesel and that's only for school runs-there's something wrong with it but I can't afford to have it fixed..and I have 2 years left to pay on it.I would love to hand it back and terminate the HP but it's catch 22-I need a car as school is too far to walk(1 hour one way) and there are no buses that way,but if I hand this one back I have no money to buy even a cheap banger...but if I hang on to this car I have no money spare to save up for an old banger.I'm ripping my hair out trying to think of what to do.

TrustyOven

That's awful to hear, Toomuchdebt.

£50/week petrol would get me to work and back 30 miles away for 5 days. You should get way better fuel economy, but like you said, something's wrong with the car.

What do you do for work? Do you earn a lot?
Any chance to increase your income?

If you could walk your kids to school for a week, that'd be £50 in your pocket. Summer's coming - sunny and dry days - more opportunity to walk them to school. 1 hour walking is Good Excercise. I remember walking to school and back - was about an hour each way.

Trishiapp

Toomuchdebt wrote: »

Just noticed my tax credits have gone down by £20 a week...that's £80 a month, and also my income support is being reduced by £22.96 a week until the 6th May for a social fund payment-I wouldn't mind except I was already paying them £40 a month as that was all I could afford...so for April I am going to be £170 down and from 6th May onwards £80 down
This repaying debt is hard enough without even less money coming in I'm so sick of saying no to the kids even for small treats
It's the car that's cripping me...£180 a month plus £50 a week on diesel and that's only for school runs-there's something wrong with it but I can't afford to have it fixed..and I have 2 years left to pay on it.I would love to hand it back and terminate the HP but it's catch 22-I need a car as school is too far to walk(1 hour one way) and there are no buses that way,but if I hand this one back I have no money to buy even a cheap banger...but if I hang on to this car I have no money spare to save up for an old banger.I'm ripping my hair out trying to think of what to do.

Good morning tmd.


I really feel for you.


It sounds like the car is essential to your family at the moment. Is there any chance you could reduce your debt repayments for time being?


I know that constantly saying 'no' to children can be challenging, but please remember that children only need love, care, food, shelter and warmth to thrive, everything else is secondary.


My two are used to me saying 'no way', consequently appreciate every little ( extra) thing I do for them; I bake them treats, play games with them, go on adventure walks, sometimes treat them to ready made pizza etc... It's the small things that count, which oftentimes, are cheap or free of charge.


Also, please remember that, this too shall pass. No life situation lasts forever, and everything that goes down, needs to come-up.


Sending you hugs.

Trishiapp

Oh yes, I was meaning to add something pragmatic...

Depending on your children's age, could you walk them to school in the morning ( whilst their legs are rested) and pick them up in the afternoon? That would save you £25 per week.


Another option is car-sharing. Could you ask around and find out if this is possible? You could take turns; one week you, another week someone else.


Long shot, but is changing their school an option?


Whilst we are very active and outdoorsy kind of family, I don't think my children would want to walk two hours per day ( especially after a long day at school) but, of course, if your children would consider this, that would save you a lot of money!

missindecisive

What about cycling to school..do you have bikes? X

jaxsmar

Why not have a chat with the school's Family Laison officer (flo) maybe they might be able to help.. will the school provide a taxi for the children? I know this depends on circumstances. Also they may know of other parents willing to car share. Why not send a letter to the social fund loan office saying your having financial hardship it's worth a try also the FLO can help with benefits etc. Sorry to hear your having such a tough time, it seems that all around me at the moment people are struggling it's of little comfort but your not alone.
I hope things improve for you. (I know it's now the school holidays)....... more expenses.:eek:

longtermplanner

Time to revisit your DMP? If you reduce your payments by £100 a month, how long will the DMP last? Have you looked at whether you would qualify for a Debt Relief Order?

Toomuchdebt

I'm not working at present due to plantar fascitis making it very painful to stand and walk-it is finally improving slowly since I started doing some ballet exercises of all things-they're designed to strengthen the arches and ankles(had it since October)-I can't walk that far to school and then back again.
We don't have bikes.
My youngest is 4 next month and it's too far for him to walk.I had a courtesy car recently because someone reversed into mine while it was parked and I spent £59 on 3 weeks of fuel and that was more journeys as they gave me a 5 seater so I couldn't fit all the kids in at once.
The schools near where we live aren't an option sadly-they are awful.I would happily go on the bus if I could but there isn't one from here to school.
When I was with stepchange I asked about a DRO and they said it wouldn't be suitable.Can't actually remember why.I can't reduce the payments really-some are only getting £10 as it is-I just want to pay it all off.Once I start work again I'll be ok but right now it's very very tight.So glad I don't drink or smoke LOL
My debts are going to take till November 2018 as it is.If my exes would pay maintenance at a decent amount I would be ok-as it is my ex husband gives me £50 a month for 4 kids, well 3 now as the eldest is 19, and the other one gives me £40 a month for 2 if he feels like it-they're both self employed so no chance of getting more.
Holidays don't make it any easier-on one hand I spend less on fuel but on the other a lot more goes on food because they get free school meals in term time.I've been getting the milk vouchers but those stop in May once my youngest is 4(sure it used to be 5).
I'm looking for work which doesn't involve standing up all the time and that has shifts to suit but not found anything yet.I can only do odd hours because of youngest's playgroup hours-this will change in September thankfully.Even then he's not the healthiest of kids-always seems to be catching viruses, so I can't imagine any employer being too happy if I have to take time off.
I'm sorry I'm being so negative-I just can't see how to get out of this.If I could get rid of the car and buy a cheap(under £500) I would be ok-it's the not having the £500 to begin with that makes that unworkable-and because I'm paying the £180 on finance for the car I have no spare money to save up.Oh and the road tax is £154 every 6 months!!
I have nothing to sell except maybe my laptop but my old one has a broken screen so can't use it anyway.Can I cry now?
I was so stupid getting into debt again.I'm not going to give up this time though-I'm refusing to consider bankruptcy-I want to get it all paid off!!!

racing_blue

You don't have bikes, but could you consider getting some? With summer coming the ride to school might even be more enjoyable than the drive

Imbroglio

how long ago did you start the HP agreement? I assume you've checked to make sure it's not still under warranty?

Toomuchdebt

racing_blue wrote: »

You don't have bikes, but could you consider getting some? With summer coming the ride to school might even be more enjoyable than the drive

Um not really-for a start the almost 4 year old isn't old enough to cycle all the way to school, neither is the 5 year old in my opinion.It's a busy route with some awkward crossings.
Secondly I can't cycle.:o I'm too fat.