Did anyone else have so much trouble deciding what they wanted to do in life?

Kayalana99

Not sure best place to post this - so feel free to move it if not but as it's a personal question and you guys give great advice I would just like to get a bit of a rant out.

I have a bit of a problem of not being able to stick at anything - I've started ICS A levels, I've started 6th forum,BTEC Business, I started an apprenticeship (to be fair I got let go from this), I started a book keeping course... can't really think of anything else but I havn't finished any of these things so I am currently 22 going on 23 this month with no qualifications.

I don't think it's so much laziness as 'change of mind' I start something and then I see something else I want to do so I go and do that instead - and round and round I go.

Last year I started an AAT course - I was determined to do it and planned on taking all 5 exams of that level in one go, I got though 2 1/2 books then my DS2 was born so I took a little break and the month after I started a business - so roll on now (a year since I started) I havn't gone back to it...mainly because I thought I wouldn't need to do it as I have my business.

That said, I thought - I have the course and the books and I've already learnt quite a bit so I decided I would 'stick with it' and even if I don't get a job at the end of it, AAT is accountancy btw so it would help me with my business books at the very least.

But here I go again... I booked my exams for 10th April and we have been looking at getting married in June 2015 and I've really taken to getting into photography (been looking at how much they charge I guess :rotfl: but I've always had a inking for it. )

So here I am, not being able to sleep because I can't stop thinking about how I am going to get into it i.e offering free shoots to get my portfolio up and working up to wedding photography...looking for courses...what kind of camera I could get....

When i should be bloody studying for my exam....

Am I still just trying to find myself or am I just still not grown up enough to stick at something?? :mad:

wapow

People go through their entire lives not knowing what they are good for.

I'll give you a spiritual perspective on this, your body and the universe is trying to direct you to another path, your heart and mind haven't tuned in yet to this path.


Might take days, might take a lifetime. Depends on you.


(I've taken that bit out as it was irrelevant at this point.)

wapow

Normal perspective, seems like you don't plan to fail, you fail to plan. Maybe you take on too much too soon? Your AAT for example and a child came in the progress of that. We might think we can do it all, but in reality it would be better to set yourself small, really small, achievable goals. The idea is to make them easy and achievable so you KNOW you can complete them. Set a deadline, then have them complete one after the other. The idea is to get used to seeing success in small goals and objectives which will help you see the bigger picture. It would be worth proper planning over a longer period, than trying to cram everything into a small timeframe. By planning over a long period you'll see success as a constant and will end up going farther than you've been before. Hope this helps. Also, if youre thinking of photography, try signing up to some forums via a search and ask them how they started off etc etc.


BTW - Still searching I am lol You are not alone.

Kayalana99

I do really want to get into photography - now, but the worry is I drop my AAT to do it then end up back at square one wanting to do something else. I'm a bit fed up with myself stopping and starting to point I keep saying to myself to finish the AAT so at least I have *something* then I can go do photography if I want to...

wapow

Didn't realise you had an exam so soon! Lol! Get revising!
Do you do this a lot where, your mind begins to track elsewhere instead of giving precedence to the most important up and coming activity you might have? Just trying to figure out if its a pattern.
Either way, you might aswell complete you AAT to give you a sense of accomplishment as it may pave the way for future completed endeavours

Kayalana99

I tend to over think everything so my mind never really focuses on one thing, I find it hard (although I do like reading) to even read a book because I am thinking about something else and having to re read a line.

Anyway - going to try and sleep again or I will regret it tomorrow.

daisiegg

No, I have always known what I wanted to do. But I have a very good friend who is not the same. She got a degree, tried a few different careers unrelated to her degree, then tried teaching, dropped out of that before qualifying, then tried another couple of things, then moved abroad with her partner (similar to you having your child!). She has not worked in over a year and, weirdly like you, has decided she wants to go into photography after looking at planning their wedding! I think it is nice she has a hobby but people are kind of taking this with a pinch of salt as well.

Not sure at all how easy it is to get into professional photography. I was always under the impression it was something people studied for ages, got qualifications, maybe they studied art too, got loads of experience, did as an amateur for a long time and worked their way up to doing it professionally. I did not think - as my friend and you seem to think - you could just buy a camera, get some work experience and then declare yourself a professional photographer. However I literally know nothing about it so I may be wrong!

I also think planning a wedding exposes you to lots of different lovely-seeming careers that you never normally come across! When we were planning ours I remember thinking at various times 'ah it would be lovely to be a wedding coordinator in a hotel....a florist...a photographer....a cake maker' and I guess if you are someone who already doesn't have a firm direction you could get really caught up in one of those ideas!

That said, I don't think it is necessarily unusual to not know what you want to do at your age. All I can say is chopping and changing so frequently could look a bit flighty on a CV and require some explanation, so just bear that in mind. I'd also say if you have any chance to get qualifications (like your exam coming up) why not just do it even if you don't intend to use it - it would give you something to fall back on!

Good luck.

Fosterdog

If it makes you feel any better I'm almost 30 and have no clue at all what I want to do with my life.

At one stage I had it all planned out but life gets in the way and I've certainly had some missed opportunities.

I went to college for three years and gained a qualification, halfway through I knew it was the wrong career for me but I forced myself to stick with it to the end. I briefly worked in the field after college but not for long. I now see it as a fall back career if I never find anything else I want to do.

I do hate the career I have now and have no intention of being in my job much longer, but it was only ever supposed to be a temporary job while I found something I wanted to do and that was seven years ago. Rent, bills and family life got in the way of me being able to just leave without having something better already lined up.

I have at least finally decided on the field I would like to work in but it's very difficult to get into and I may need qualifications which I will struggle to get while working full time which I can't afford not to do.

As for the photography, it's something I'm interested in, I have a decent enough camera and have been slowing building up my kit but these days everyone and his dog are photographers. They may not all be good at it but it seems to be something everyone is doing so if you go down that road be prepared for a lot of knock backs.

YORKSHIRELASS

Oh its difficult. I am 20 years older than you with two teenage kids and I still feel sometimes that I havent got my life sorted.

The sensible thing to do would be to get the AAT qualifications and make the photography into a hobby for now.

But you are young - and life will probably take you down all sorts of roads that you werent expecting so I just wouldnt worry about it. Sometimes you can think about things too much!

PenguinJim

Finish those exams!

Imagine how great your CV would look if you'd simply finished those qualifications you'd started. It doesn't matter if you use them or not; later in life you'll have a lot more choice if you have a few qualifications to demonstrate your skill and dedication.

A lot of companies require applicants to have any University degree (for example) not for what they've learned during the degree, but because it shows that they can apply themselves to something and finish it, even over many years.

You can't guarantee a secure future where you'll definitely have any job, let alone one you'll love, but getting these exams finished (next week?) might make all the difference in five or ten years.

Kayalana99

I think I need to follow my head atm and finish these exams I know - the kids are getting baby sat this morning so I will be cleaning the house and then sitting down to get a few hours studying (I've even closed my eBay shop temporarily as I am running out of time and I will fail the 2nd one at this rate as I booked two in one go)

It's lovely hearing these stories thank you - although not very inspiring but I guess perhaps it's normal for some not to know what they want.

I think people do think photography is easier then it seems - but one thing I have that most don't is a background in photo shop which I use for my current business - not an expert by far but you can do wonders if you just no a few tricks...saying that how hard it is going to be has been playing on my mind because it does seem pretty much like picking up a camera and a short(in my head) learning experience - my sister said this is basically what her friend did although he doesn't do weddings but models.

The cherry on the cake yesterday* morning was when I was stood in the post office and the person in front said that she was a web designer / photographer and I was stood their like that's what I should be doing.. (yes I've also dabbled in web design ...lol)

One positive thing is my CV doesn't have a lot of gaps - a few months when I was 16/17 but I did keep a (crap) steady job.

I think it would be a good idea to start with doing it as a hobby regardless.