I feel bad!

smartpicture

madasabull wrote: »

I bought a place by the sea with acres of land, a stream and a forest. I ended up with no debt, a lovely home and no mortgage.

Congratulations, you've obviously done very well for yourself. I presume that to have done this your income must have increased significantly over those 10 years. So I'm just wondering why the child maintenance remained at £40 per child for the whole 10 years. Even if you had remained on minimum wage income, the value of £40 and the things it would buy would have been halved during that period.

If your daughter's household nonetheless relies on that £40, it might have been preferable to give some warning that it was going to stop in a few months to give them time to adjust rather than stopping without warning.

Csa_Survivor

smartpicture wrote: »

Congratulations, you've obviously done very well for yourself. I presume that to have done this your income must have increased significantly over those 10 years. So I'm just wondering why the child maintenance remained at £40 per child for the whole 10 years. Even if you had remained on minimum wage income, the value of £40 and the things it would buy would have been halved during that period.

If your daughter's household nonetheless relies on that £40, it might have been preferable to give some warning that it was going to stop in a few months to give them time to adjust rather than stopping without warning.

You have got to be joking! The man has already said that he continued to pay by hook or by crook £80 a week even though he was only working part time, even going as far as selling personal possessions. He then went on to say he was hit by a truck and although he could quite lawfully have only paid a few quid a week, still carried on paying using his injury compensation for 4 years! I notice that his ex must have been quite happy to take this money from him,
even though he had nothing but a part time job and a bag over his shoulder, something that is worth remembering I think!
As usual, other things that dads end up paying for are glossed over and ignored, it was quite clearly stated that car repairs, clothes and nice holidays were also paid for as well on top of everything else, I can only assume that as this bloke sounds a good guy, Birthdays, Christmas and general treats were very nice too so I am really struggling with the suggestion that he has not paid enough, that's nonsense to me!
I can only say this to you madasabull, congratulations , you have served your time, now enjoy your future with your kids.

Lovetoread

Very well said, Csa Survivor.

The mother should have been aware that payments would eventually cease anyway once their children became of a certain age, so can't be much of a shock to the system. And he's still paying for his other child. I fail to see where the issue lies, I think the OP has done a marvellous job and gone above and beyond for his children's sakes and putting their needs before his own. And now he has what sounds like a lovely home where he can look forward to creating special memories and enjoying some lovely holidays with his children.

PlymouthMaid

You sound like a lovely caring Father. I would just have a chat with the youngest and explain to her that now she is grown up things have changed but you are still her Dad and there for her if things go pear shaped. Financial things will now be between you and the girls directly and obviously you are not expected to help them out on a regular basis but you might still occasionally anyway.

madasabull

It's been a month now since maintenance payment have stopped, and I have had no attacks from the ex. The girls have been told by their mum that they have to now get a job or get out, and I agree with her on that score though

jacklink

ahh, now the kids are no longer of a financial benefit she wants them out, lol.

mind you, i did tough love on mine, when they left school, they claimed £45 in benefits, i took £40 from them (i didn't need to) they both found work within 3 weeks and have been working ever since, that was 6 years ago, i only take £35 board from them , tough love works and is so beneficial to them, im proud of my boys as you will be of your girls,

well done dad x

take care