Gitdog bullying my mum.

elsien

Just after moral support and to see if anyone's come through anything similar, as I know it needs proper help not internet behavioural diagnosis.
Mum (in her seventies) has Gitdog while I'm at work, so a lot of the time. As I do shift work with varying days, times and hours, doggy day care to take the stress off her isn't really an option.


He's starting stropping at her when he doesn't get his own way, culminating today in him jumping on her so she couldn't get up off the settee, barking right in her face and mouthing her arm and he frightened the life out of her.
I've talked to my dog trainer tonight and they've come up with a few ideas for now to avoid the triggers while we sort out a proper plan. And he's not a nasty dog, underneath the silliness he's really sweet and gentle. But in a previous life he has learned to throw his considerable weight around to get his own way and to have tantrums when it doesn't work. He knows it doesn't work with me so I don't get so much of it, and he doesn't do it on her when I'm there.
I can't have him terrorising mum so if we can't sort it I'm going to have to rehome him. So at the moment I'm feeling a bit rubbish as until this last week he'd made a lot of progress and I really thought we were starting to get somewhere at last. Little !!!! doesn't know when he's onto a good thing.:(

meritaten

sorry hun - its your mum needs training here I think. you can only 'allow' a dog to bully you if you are not confident in dealing with him. she needs to 'assert' herself. needs to learn the right 'tone of voice', perhaps?
my bro has a very bright, lovely,dog - which walks all over him, yet listens to and obeys his wife. because she talks to the dog like a 'drill sergeant'! my bro doesn't give him commands, he sort of 'asks' lmao - his command to 'sit' sounds more like 'please sit down'? and the dog ignores him.
do you see what I am getting at? your mum needs to learn how to get the 'gitdog' to listen to her.

Mojisola

elsien wrote: »

He's starting stropping at her when he doesn't get his own way, culminating today in him jumping on her so she couldn't get up off the settee, barking right in her face and mouthing her arm and he frightened the life out of her.

I agree with meritaten - your Mum needs some training as well as implementing any techniques for the dog.

I'm not surprised that she's frightened at the moment - the dog is one short step away from biting!

Would your trainer do some sessions with your Mum and the dog without you there so that the interactions can be seen?

The drill sergeant voice works with some dogs but, as long as the dog can hear that you mean what you're saying, even a quiet tone can work.

pawsies

Does he have a crate he can go to? (Not as a punishment but more so your mum can predict that he is going to start playing up so gives him something tasty in there instead?)

DaveTheMus

I think you should get someone else to look after your dog, failing that, the dog has to go. It's very unfair and selfish to expect a woman who is almost 80 to look after a dog that hasn't been properly trained and, from the sounds of it, is very close to biting her.

bertiewhite

I was going to agree with the first few replies - your Mum needs to be alpha. We have dogs & horses and it's all about body language with both - you don't have to be big in the animal kingdom to be boss.

The trouble is you have to be mentally in control as well and I'm not sure your Mum should be having to do this at her age.

krlyr

Rather than the irrational "he wants to be alpha, just because" argument (forward'm pretty sure you've said you don't follow..I think!) I would sit down and look at causes or explanations for his behaviour.

First question I'd be asking is why now? Has he just settled in and gained enough confidence that his behaviour is changing? Or is there possibly another cause?

Have you changed his diet? His exercise regime?

I'd rule out any medical issues he may be suffering, they may not be obvious from a glance. Or could your mum be suffering a health issue - I've heard of cases of dogs acting strangely when their owners have been ill.

Could something be stressing him out - either in your mum's home (have heard of dodgy bulbs causing behaviour issues in dogs!) or other areas in his life - a new class he may be finding more stressful than you realise? Sometimes dogs show stress in funny ways, not always in the most obvious way.

I think dog behaviour always has a cause - whether it's a fairly straight forward "his leg is sore so he's grumpy when overexercised" to something like separation anxiety - it can be a bit irrational for a dog to freak out when left for 2 minutes, but there is at least an identified issue like SA. It's about trying to figure out the cause(s - there may be more than one) and seeing if they can be addressed.

dandelionclock30

DaveTheMus wrote: »

I think you should get someone else to look after your dog, failing that, the dog has to go. It's very unfair and selfish to expect a woman who is almost 80 to look after a dog that hasn't been properly trained and, from the sounds of it, is very close to biting her.

I agree you would never forgive yourself if he went for her. If you cant get a friend or neighbour to look after him then pay a professional dog walker/sitter.
At 70+ your Mum can be doing without this and being frightened in her own home.I mean shes an old lady isnt she.
Why should your Mum have this problem? its not even her dog.Her needs must come first not the dogs.

Raksha

I wonder if its related to the perceived progress in other areas. Like squeezing a balloon, some methods of behavioural training can lead to other probkems which dont appear to be related

Person_one

This isn't a reason to rehome him, but it is a reason to find alternative care for him when you aren't around. Dog walkers can be very flexible, or you can work intensively on getting him to settle when alone for longer periods.

Dogs do pick up on it when humans are anxious and nervous around them (as your mum probably is) and they reflect that anxiety by getting stressed and worried themselves which appears as problematic behaviour.

Dogs don't however 'throw tantrums' or manipulate, I think you may be viewing his behaviour through human eyes a bit too much there.

zaksmum

Has he been neutered elsien?