Rent for teenager living at home?

bertiewhite

How much do you think is reasonable to ask a 19 year old living at home for rent? He brings home around a grand each month dependant on overtime and when I first started working I remember having to give my Mum a third of whatever I took home, overtime or not. I would rather ask a fixed amount though in order to teach him that the bills are the same each month whatever you earn.

So how do I set a figure? I have 2 in mind – there are 4 of us living in the house so 1 figure includes a quarter of all utility bills, council tax & food (£140). The other adds on a quarter of what my mortgage is (£300). Given that his older brother is paying £400/month in rent (inclusive of utilities) and has to find his food on top I reckon that a middle figure of £200/month is reasonable.

I will say that up until now he has been doing a “big grocery” shop each month as he works for Tesco and at first it seemed to work because he was contributing to the household bills and it saved us doing the big shop. Lately though it’s apparent that he’s not getting as much as he used to, what he does get isn’t great and usually the wife & I end up having to do another shop anyway to supplement it which defeats the object really.

What do others think?

pleasedelete

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4910310

this is a very long thread about the same thing. Read that as a starting point.

ladyweasel

£200 a month for sure! That leaves plenty left over for him to start saving up for his future

Mr_F_Dorsetty

bertiewhite wrote: »

What do others think?

We never charged our kids but then both had left by 18 years old. Though if they hadn't have left then we still wouldn't have charged them to be honest. Though we would have gently enquired why they were still in the house, not out getting their own life sorted.

Now our kids are adults of 22 & 23 yrs old respectively and they own their own houses. One is in the UK but about to sell up and leave, whilst the other already owns abroad and has left for good. Despite what would maybe be seen as our generosity with them all their lives, they seemingly have no problem understanding what bill is or understanding money and how to use it.

But that is just us; what we do, is what we do. We're neither right nor wrong, just us.

However, I would say, (personally speaking of course and without reference to the OP in anyway), that if I was paying rent in a house, any house, then that would make it my house as much as anyone else's.

So like in any shared house I could get all my mates around or women or whatever. But I'd definitely not be paying for the privilege to be treated like a 'young adult' paying my parents some rent.

If people wanted to tell me how to live because it was 'their house', then I simply wouldn't be paying. But there again I rented my first flat at 17 yrs old and my wife left home at 18 yrs old as well.

If it was as someone suggest £200 a month surely he could move out to a shared house for that? Much better for everyone imo.

But hey, what do I know

I'm wholly out of touch it seems with 'modern parenting' (and mostly modern life :rotfl:), I just don't get kids who do not want to get away from living with their parents asap or parents who do not want them to leave.

Again this is nothing to do with the OP, just talking in general here.

When working I used to get really wound up by people who clearly didn't empower their kids to leave home at any age but then moaned like hell they were still in the house... eh? What?

Certainly our parenting style would not suit everyone or probably hardly anyone but some people really confuse me with the way they treat their offspring.

Bennifred

I think £200 per month is fine - it's what our offspring contribute to the housekeeping pot if they live at home once they have finished full-time education. They know they're getting a good deal compared to living elsewhere! :cool:

bertiewhite

Mrs F - I am actually on the same wavelength as you, although he's not my own kid so I'm not as emotionally tied.

There are several motives for asking him to contribute from our/my point of view -

1) we're concerned he'll have no incentive to move on from Tesco (or home) if he has an easy ride
2) the moment my 2 teenage stepkids leave home we'll be downsizing to something with a smaller mortgage and smaller bills
3) whilst he is in control of food shopping, the freezer will always be full of burgers & pizza etc. and he's not the healthiest of people anyway. At least if he gives us the money instead of doing the shopping we can give him a healthier diet
4) this could be a contentious issue for some - finances aren't exactly tight but then they're not that great either. His Mum has had to scrimp & save as a single mum to give them what they wanted for quite a few years and I think that she deserves to be able to enjoy life now that her kids are, well - NOT kids anymore

stebiz

Mr_F_Dorsetty wrote: »

We never charged our kids but then both had left by 18 years old. Though if they hadn't have left then we still wouldn't have charged them to be honest. Though we would have gently enquired why they were still in the house, not out getting their own life sorted.

Now our kids are adults of 22 & 23 yrs old respectively and they own their own houses. One is in the UK but about to sell up and leave, whilst the other already owns abroad and has left for good. Despite what would maybe be seen as our generosity with them all their lives, they seemingly have no problem understanding what bill is or understanding money and how to use it.

But that is just us; what we do, is what we do. We're neither right nor wrong, just us.

However, I would say, (personally speaking of course and without reference to the OP in anyway), that if I was paying rent in a house, any house, then that would make it my house as much as anyone else's.

So like in any shared house I could get all my mates around or women or whatever. But I'd definitely not be paying for the privilege to be treated like a 'young adult' paying my parents some rent.

If people wanted to tell me how to live because it was 'their house', then I simply wouldn't be paying. But there again I rented my first flat at 17 yrs old and my wife left home at 18 yrs old as well.

If it was as someone suggest £200 a month surely he could move out to a shared house for that? Much better for everyone imo.

But hey, what do I know

I'm wholly out of touch it seems with 'modern parenting' (and mostly modern life :rotfl:), I just don't get kids who do not want to get away from living with their parents asap or parents who do not want them to leave.

Again this is nothing to do with the OP, just talking in general here.

When working I used to get really wound up by people who clearly didn't empower their kids to leave home at any age but then moaned like hell they were still in the house... eh? What?

Certainly our parenting style would not suit everyone or probably hardly anyone but some people really confuse me with the way they treat their offspring.

I find some of that quite sad really. My daughter has just hit 18 and instead of showing her the door we're actually in the middle of getting a loft conversion for her along with her own bathroom etc. I love having her and her brother and sister at home.

Of course a time will come when she wants to leave but like she says 'I'm enjoying life being young' and I'm happy for her to do so. She'll have plenty of time to have responsibility and buy her own house and move on being an adult.

Whilst she's studying she'll pay nothing. When she does start work I'll keep a percentage of her wages and open a savings account for it towards a deposit on a house. In the meantime if she finds a boyfriend and wants to move him in then that is fine too. The house is big enough and he can pay the same too and that will be saved.

She wants to live local. She is a home bird and won't be moving away. She is even studying local too - her choice. But then again we've always been a close family.

Pipkin

We charge £25 a week, but our child is not working. I did feel conflicted about it at first, but now I think it's reasonable, were his dad and I to disappear overnight he would be having to face up to the reality of the true cost of living, this is at least an introduction to it. The extra money is ploughed back into maintaining the house (any diy needing done), which is a big help.

Lgas

stebiz wrote: »

Whilst she's studying she'll pay nothing. When she does start work I'll keep a percentage of her wages and open a savings account for it towards a deposit on a house. In the meantime if she finds a boyfriend and wants to move him in then that is fine too. The house is big enough and he can pay the same too and that will be saved.

I think that is a brilliant idea! My parents never charged me a penny, I moved out at 24 (commuted to uni), then back again for a short while at 26, but I never saved a penny either, I still don't have any savings, so that idea is excellent, I wish they'd have done that for me in hindsight!

onomatopoeia99

In 1987 when I was 18 I paid my parents £25/week out of my £98 (gross) salary. I don't remember what the take home amount was, but the rent seemed a fair proportion.

I don't think it's reasonable to ask for a contribution to the mortgage, but yes to a share of bills and food.

Mojisola

Lgas wrote: »

I think that is a brilliant idea! My parents never charged me a penny, I moved out at 24 (commuted to uni), then back again for a short while at 26, but I never saved a penny either, I still don't have any savings, so that idea is excellent, I wish they'd have done that for me in hindsight!

Why do you wish they had saved your money and not that you'd saved your own money?