Should i get a wonga loan

summer33

Carfal wrote: »

Why is your son so determined to continue with packed lunches?

1. Is it because he prefers the food, in which case change the choice you are giving him from hot meal vs packed lunch to what goes into the packed lunch. Make the choice to be from 2/3 affordable, nutritious options, not the entire contents of the fridge/ supermarket.

2. Does he genuinely prefer a hot meal? So give him soup or pasta.

3. Do his friends have hot dinners and he wants to sit with them for lunch? Or is there some other advantage to having school dinners, like being off the playground -away from certain other children- for longer? The change of school would help with this, or he needs to get over it and sit with other children. Someone he knows and gets on with will be having packed lunch. If there is a real issue and he is genuinely unhappy, then you'll need to work with the school to solve it.

4. Is there a culture within school of children stealing, commenting on or out-doing each other with regard to their food? Same solution as 3.

5. Is he unaware of how serious your situation is and this is how he can help? As a child he doesn't need all the details, but should be aware that there is a limit to what your family can afford. Could you compromise, e.g. Packed lunch most days but school dinners once a week on his favourite meal-day or lunchtime club day.

6. Is/are your child(ren) really in charge in your house, rather than the adults? In which case, you need to reassess how your household works or you'll never get out of debt. Is this how you've ended up with school trip debts, by not being able to say "no" (assuming your child is at a state school, therefore the only compulsory school trip costs are for residentials or special extras)?


Oh, and forget the SATs stuff. It makes not a difference for the children. He should be doing his best at school, with your support, to get a good education, not to achieve some arbitrary level.

Thanks

Son likes hot dinners that is the short of it, so all your other points do not exist.

If you read the question when I originally posted, it was advice on me getting a wonga loan. I didnt come on here to be judge as a parent and told my children rule the house.

No I havent gone into detail with my child about MY debts. He is 10...yes 10 and a child, it is my debt that I am getting myself out of. Why would I tell a child "oh guess what we owe 15k so cannot afford your dinner money"

Please if you are going to post post an answer to the question that was asked, not judgement

summer33

dancingfairy wrote: »

I *think* you are actually going forward but because of the catch up plans it feels like you are going backwards. By this I think you are paying 500 off the debts each month but going backwards by 111 (according to your SOA) so you are actually going forward by just under 400 a month (from what I can tell, someone will tell me if my maths if off here!).
What this means is you can either slow the rate of repayment so that it balances with what you actually have available per month or you accept that although you are taking on more unsecured debts, credit cards and loans you are actually winning. The only problem with this second approach is that you have run out of reasonably cheap credit and are thinking of taking a wonga loan which will be hideously expensive.
Anyway you're doing great and you've obviously had loads of ideas and suggestions, some of which you can implement.
I can understand it's a bit of a shock for you at the moment so try the ideas you can but understand that the more controversial ideas (selling the caravan and giving up the school dinners can always be kept in reserve for a later date). You can review the situation in a few months and see how you feel about things then (hopefully you won't be in a such a stressed situation and you can see things a bit clearer). BTW I'm not saying you should or shouldn't sell the caravan just with everything going on it can be hard to see what's what.
Best of Luck
df

Thanks Dancing Fairy for you positive post.

I can see I am going forward instead of back. Yes as I know it is going to be hard, like I have said before, but I am prepared for it. I know it is going to take a very long time, but I am determined to make this work.

We are in such a mess with the priority bills this month, as my hubbie been on sick pay since sept, with slipped disc, then he broke his collar bone, so his wage was reduced to 20% less. Tax credits were not increased as over the year it did not increase of the 2500 limit they have with a change in income

He is now back at work since begingin of feb, so we are paying catch up.

Yes we will do, without the sale of the caravan, People can post as many times as they can, but that is that, I have said it over and over again, and dont mean to be rude, but if any other people can only offer that advice, please dont post, as it is a waste of time.

I would prefer good positive advice. Yes I have come on here for advice, but I entitled to my own opinion on things and if dont agree, then think I can say that without offending anyone

Thanks for your comments though Dancing Fairy........

summer33

jayhab wrote: »

Hello, some more advice for you and please believe me when I say that this is not a personal attack on you!

Firstly, contact Sky: explain your situation and advise that you simply cannot afford to continue paying them £36 a month. If you believe you cannot live without Sky's services, ask them if there is anything at all they can do for you with your monthly bill - there are numerous offers available to new and existing customers (half price for x months etc), you could explain that you would rather not bounce their payment completely, though it is looking like you may have to. Alternatively ask them if they are able to release you from your contract early in order to be able to cancel.

Secondly, the mobile phone: again contact the provider, explain the situation, ask if they can do anything for you - they may release you early - the worst they can say is 'no'. Ask if they can reduce your tariff to the bare minimum - even if this means re-contracting. If they will release you and a mobile phone is essential, rather than PAYG which will require top-ups, why not consider Ovivo mobile?

Thirdly, the child's school dinner must stop - I understand your point that you want to know he's had a meal but the packed lunch you provide will probably be better for him than the one the school provides! A packed lunch doesn't have to mean boring food! As a start why not meet him half way? One week dinners, one week packed lunches. Or packed lunches all the way and he can earn school dinners for doing jobs around the house?

Water rates - I believe it has been mentioned previously, but contact your local water board and get a meter installed - you will be amazed at the reduction in your bills!

Next - the 2 xboxes - I again understand that these were gifts, but having 1 xbox is a luxury, having 2 in the house when there are such financial problems is crazy! Unfortunately, 1 of them should go - it is even more unfortunate that given the age of the xbox platform - there won't be much cash realised from the sale - however - it is cash that you do not have right now! I would suggest that the remaining xbox is moved to the living room and becomes the 'family xbox' where all of the family can use it TOGETHER (possibly in place of sky etc etc)

It is excellent that you are looking to reduce your grocery shopping by using Lidl/Aldi etc - keep at this and look to reduce further if you can - I won't try to point out the obvious but buy in bulk/when on offer etc to maximise savings!

Your petrol spend is high (same for everyone I think!) but make sure your car is as fuel efficient as possible - check tyre pressures are correct, drive with windows closed, don't use air-con etc etc

As soon as your Gas and Elec arrears are cleared, you must make enquiries to come off of pre-payment meter - these are quite often stacked in the Utility company's favour and charge far more then quarterly/monthly billed customers. £160 for G&E is probably about £60-£70 a month over the average for a property of your size.

I haven't mentioned it yet, but here goes - The Caravan: can only echo what others have said, though I agree with you it is currently a symbol of 'good times' for when you can 'get away from it all'. Unfortunately, no matter how cheap the weekends away are, unless they are completely free or paid for by someone else, they are a luxury that you cannot afford right now. You can look forward to holidays abroad in 4* hotels for you and your family..... when you are debt free. Right now your priority for yourself and your children is to pay off all your debts and not to have weekends away as if everything is ok! (things probably seem even worse when you get back to reality from weekends away?) Selling the caravan now will realise essential funds that can start to get you out of your awful situation. It will mean getting rid of your 'symbol of hope' but would mean that you are able to clear at least 1 of your debts - this should be celebrated!! As with each of your other debts as and when you clear them! The stark reality is if your situation should decline and you become Insolvent, you will be in danger of losing your house, mobile phones, sky tv, xboxes and the caravan - All of these assets will be sold at auction for as much as can be raised on the day - probably far less than they are actually worth.

Taking hard and cruel action right now will ensure that you are guaranteed a happy and debt-free future, unfortunately only taking small steps will only extend the problem and increase the risk that you will fall deeper into debt.

Please take my advice as being in good faith - it is not meant as a dig or personal attack on you, but you do need to make some tough decisions and act swiftly - GOOD LUCK!!!

Forgot to mention, both of the xboxes are down stairs anyway. 1 in convervatory and 1 is in the living room. No game consoles are allowed in their room.

dancingfairy

The situation with your husband sounds like a nightmare. I hope he is making a full recovery. How long until you get back on top of the mortgage (you may have said I might have missed it). Hopefully you can get back on an even keel again soon.
It's a pain about ebay as well, hopefully you can get it sold soon.
Good luck on your journey.
df
p.s the thing I always find seems to cost lots is food. It's so easy to go to the shops for bread and milk and buy half the shop! I find meal plans save so much money, especially if you can do something like have a roast on sunday, then have the leftovers in sandwiches/cold meat, then maybe put the rest into a pie/curry/risotto etc (Really stretching the meat out). Also try having a super cheap evening once a week - beans on toast or soup etc. Have you tried the storecupboard challenge? Basically you rummage through your cupboards and see how many meals you can make by using up all those bits and bobs that lurk at the back and by trying to only buy the essentials to make meals. Homemade baking is always good as well Mind you the problem is trying to fit it all in to the day! Your food bill seems pretty good but if it's something you want to try and reduce then the moneysavingoldstyle board has loads of ideas.
(Sorry if this has already been mentioned I didn't want to go through the whole thread again).
df

Archer0710

I've read through your posts and am really pleased that you have decided not to take the Wonga loan and like a few others I rarely get involved in commenting on people's lives as I can't ever speak from experience as I haven't been there struggling to make ends meet.

Food budgeting is the hardest thing in the world, but easy savings are to be had so glad you have focused on this but it is hard to get on top of! Challenges etc are ok it planning is the key.

I can only echo some of the other thoughts, like getting rid of sky it's only a luxury if you can afford it, if not it's a millstone dragging you down. Stepping down the supermarkets is great to but I really don't understand your reluctance to sell your caravan. £2000 would clear your mortgage arrears and council tax arrears wiping out the two most pressing and priority debts. I'd feel Ill with mortgage arrears they just wouldn't be something I could ignore.

I fully understand the sentiments behind keeping the van but they really aren't that cheap and it's more financial commitment etc, Secure storage and insurance aside (I get some people don't have it) but with your current arrears etc (not withstanding unseen emergencies that aren't in your budget) when realistically will you be able to afford to use it properly repaying your arrears at the rate you are? Fuel and site costs quickly add up and even for the two of us a week away amounts to in excess of £100 site fees alone. Add fuel to get there, at reduced mpg and the inevitable additional costs etc your week away is a couple of hundred pounds.

Facing mortgage arrears of selling my van I know which I'd do. I get the caravan thing as I do own one, but if you can't afford to use it it's another thing sat depreciating and how long can you continue to sell small things to patch the hole in your budget?
I'd sell mine like a shot if I had any kind of debt arrears. I'd sell that before pawning my rings which mean more to me than a box on wheels and at the end of the day you can easily replace a caravan.

I know it's not advice you want, I suspect you know it's the logical answer too hence your responses however positive advice would be contact CAP they are very good I know someone who has gone through their courses to be an advisor and is very good.

Trishiapp

Good evening summer33.

As a general rule, I do not get involved in responding to other people's threads, as I believe in 'Live and let live' motto. However, having read through the entire thread, I must confess to feeling somewhat frustrated with your naive attitude to your problems.


A lot of people provided you with fantastic advice, but you chose to see it as criticism rather than helpful suggestions ( some even apologised to you for speaking up! I won't be doing that.)


Also, I must point out to you that, your initial question of whether you should get a Wonga loan resulted in people giving you very wise advice how to avoid it, hence the suggestion to sell your caravan ( amongst other things.)


I honestly do not understand your need to hold on to stuff, but sadly, much like everybody else, I do not believe the small changes you are making are enough to pull you out of the hole.


In other words, if your house caught large fire, would you use small buckets of water to put it out?


I truly hope things do work out for you, but I'm out!

Pepperoni

summer33 wrote: »

Thanks

Son likes hot dinners that is the short of it, so all your other points do not exist.

I like holidays to The Maldives but it doesn't mean that I should still continue with them whilst trying to pay / clear debt. I'm not judging you as a parent at all - but if this was a case of you or your partner spending that amount per week / month on shop bought lunches, I'm sure you would put a stop to it, so not sure why its any different for your child.

Pepperoni

Summer, I also have to add that you seem to be taking a bizarre look on your debt. I.e. 'Gas / Elec isn't what got us into debt' and there were a few comments earlier on in the thread that were similar (with reference to your caravan I think). It no longer matters what got you into the debt - its what is going to get you out of it.

sacha28

summer33 wrote: »

Forgot to mention, both of the xboxes are down stairs anyway. 1 in convervatory and 1 is in the living room. No game consoles are allowed in their room.

:wall::wall::wall::wall::wall::wall::wall::wall:

Why why why why why why???? Why on earth do you need one in 2 rooms downstairs?

Your son likes hot dinners, that is the short of it??!! He is 10, YOU TELL HIM how it goes down, not the other way round. He can have a hot dinner at tea time, cheaper packed lunches at lunch time.

For goodness sake you will only get yourself further into trouble with this stupid attitude of yours. See you on the BR board, I'm done trying to give you the reality when you clearly have your head stuck firmly up your own backside.

matttye

summer33 wrote: »

I would prefer good positive advice. Yes I have come on here for advice, but I entitled to my own opinion on things and if dont agree, then think I can say that without offending anyone

People have posted 'good positive advice' but you're not ready/willing to take it.

You have debts. You need money. You have assets. If you sell those assets, you'll get money, which can then clear some of those debts. You can also cut back on expenses to free up some extra money.

It's clear what you need to do - sell stuff and cut back on stuff. People have posted this but you've responded with a bunch of excuses.

You're wasting your time and everybody else's time when you're clearly not in the right frame of mind to do this.

My last post in this thread. Good luck with it.