any private foster carers or social workers out there?

notsurewhattoput

I have 2 children live with me as part of a private foster arrangement.

Now me and my husband are planning on seperating during the summer hols, both boys go home during the hols.

I would like to carry on caring for the boys when they come back in sept, my husband will still be around a lot picking our 2 boys up from school staying to cook their dinner etc till I get home from work. He is happy to still be questioned / checked out by the fostering agency involved.

Neither boy we look after is vunerable etc, they are purely here as they wish to study / play sport in this country, the sheme they are on here is very well run and hands on. The fact that my husband will be sleeping under a different roof will have no affect on them at all.

But I'm worried that the agency involved in overlooking private foster arrangemnts may see this differently and take them away. I have read cases where this has happened and I can understand that normally but these are not normal kids in care if you know what I mean.

Does anyone have any advice or been though this before where they have fostered and kept their kids whilst separating from their partner? The only other way around it was to say to the agency we are still together but we also have another house where he will be sleeping?

Not sure what to do / say, could say nothing and I don't think anyone would be any the wiser?

xx

jackomdj

My Aunty fosters and she had children at the point she split from my Uncle, although that was a long time ago. She has continued to foster even though she is single and she actually ended up adopting two of her long term foster children (although they are both adults now)

notsurewhattoput

and when she split with your uncle the children weren't taken away? Thats fab news, I could only see american websites that said anything and they seem a lot harsher over there :-)

tiny_courageous

Speak to your current social worker (as you're currently caring for the children I assume you've already been assessed as a private fostering arrangement), so long as things are amicable between yourself and your husband and you continue to provide stability to the children it probably won't be a problem.

If you haven't already been assessed, contact your local children's services as if you're caring for the children and they stay with you for more than 28 consecutive days, you need to be assessed asap!

Beckyy

I would be honest, partly because you may both move on and (although not in the near future) eventually start dating again. I don't see why you wouldn't be able to continue and it would be an insult to all the single parents out there if they were to suggest otherwise.

whodathunkit

It sounds as if the boys are lodgers rather than foster children - as you say this is an arrangement through an agency, surely it will come down to that agency's rules?

notsurewhattoput

Thanks, yes already been assessed, all ok.

They are more like lodgers really because they are here in a professional capacity, but any child who lives with anyone for over 28 days that isnt an immediate member of their family is considered under a private fostering agreement.

Me and my husband have discussed separating for years, we are more like best friends than husband and wife and have decided that this summer would be the ideal time. The children really would be ok with it, I just don't want to lose them.

Thanks for your replies

X

Vomityspice

How old are the children?
You do know that private fostering regulations only apply until the child is 16?

squirrelchops

Hi,

As has already been mentioned I would speak with the allocated social worker. There has to be one whilst the boys are being privately fostered although visits may not be that often. Speak to them but there is no visible reason why you cannot continue with this arrangement.

notsurewhattoput

Thanks, yes I know about the age thing, they are 13 and 15. It's made me feel better talking about it

X

sulkisu

I would just be honest. It's not just the social worker's opinion that matters - the parents themselves might well have a view on the change in circumstance, especially if they are from overseas.