Wedding present advice

Buzzybee90

Good morning all!

We have been invited to a friends wedding this summer, we have been invited for the full day.

I am in a dilemma as what sort of price range gift is the norm. There's a list (not like a shop registry but a handwritten list) with things widely ranging in price.

Is there a norm? Or should I just get what we can afford? I don't want to seem cheap but also don't want to seem OTT!

Thanks everyone!

Person_one

No rules, spend what you want to spend and what fits your budget.

browneyedbazzi

I think it depends a bit on your relationship to the couple and your budget. If it's immediate family or a very close friend then I tend to spend a bit more than I would for someone I wasn't as close to....but I never spend more than I can comfortably afford!

Also, if there's a lot of expense involved in attending the wedding (ie you have to travel a considerable distance and pay for accommodation etc) then I would usually spend a bit less on the gift - I suppose some people might think that's a bit mean though.

Kynthia

There's no rules and people differ on both what they can afford and what they think is an appropriate amount. People know this and that's why their list includes things at varying prices. I had close family with little money buy a token gift off the list and hand make us something, plus I'm sure some others who went off the list re-gifted things they had at home. However I was just happy that people came and celebrated with us, so don't worry and don't over-stretch yourself unnecessarily.

daisiegg

We had items on our gift list ranging from £4 to about £90. We made sure there were loads of things under £25. People were very generous and it was actually lots of the cheaper items that went unbought. I hope people didn't feel too embarrassed to get them and that no one stretched themselves to buy a more expensive gift Anyway my point is...the bride and groom will not care one jot how much you spend on their gift (assuming they are nice people that is!) and you should spend an amount you feel comfortable with. I also agree that you should take into account any money you spend on travel or accommodation. We had people travelling from afar and we really appreciated how much they were spending to get there, so we genuinely would have been happy not to receive a thing from them.

Buzzybee90

Thanks, we are are travelling and staying so will take that into account! Daisy - sounds like a really good range, they've got things from £4-£300+! So I was a little stuck!

pops5588

Me and 2 of my friends were invited to the full day of our friends wedding. We all had different budgets and weren't sure what to do so in the end we pooled together and got some John Lewis vouchers so they could get some of the stuff on their list themselves, which would probably end up being their taste instead of us taking a guess.

GobbledyGook

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

Thanks, we are are travelling and staying so will take that into account! Daisy - sounds like a really good range, they've got things from £4-£300+! So I was a little stuck!

The thing is they'll be catering their list to what they know of their guests. as well. For our wedding we had 2 things that were around that price. I was a bit embarrassed to have them on, but OH has two relatives who buy wedding gifts around that price at every wedding. If there's nothing on the list they buy something else anyway. His cousin got the most hideous £400 ornament/statue thingy that I've ever seen. It was a complete waste of money as it's hidden in a cupboard and has been for over 10 years! We felt if people were going to spend that (and there is/was no talking them out of it) then it might as well be on something we'd use.

So your friends won't expect you to be spending that kind of money. Just spend what is comfortable for you. Friends won't mind if that is £400 or £4.

claire16c

I normally spend around £50 on a gift or voucher.

Sometimes the expensive items are put on there as that couple gets a discount from the shop afterwards if no one buys it.

lazywife

As everyone else has said it's what you can afford. The bride and groom won't judge you on what you spend. I tend to give about £30 for a wedding gift from myself and OH for a friends wedding, or cousin. (probably £15-£20 ish for a evening do).
L.xxx

Brighton_belle

It's about what you can afford, especially once you factor in travel costs etc.
*Shock horror* but I have been to several weddings where I didn't buy a present at all. I was on benefits in a bedsit and hadn't had a holiday in years, the couple concerned were all professionals with their own place and had lived together for a number of years. They just wanted me there.


I do think the whole present buying thing for weddings is strange - it used to be to help young couples set up there first home. My mum and dad's total number of presents where a chopping board and an ironing board. They were very grateful they really had very little in those days and still use these 60 years later.
I think you've already won the jackpot if you've met and are marrying the love of your life anyway - who needs presents on top? And yes I felt the same about our wedding a few years ago.


However, I recognise social convention and now I have a bit more money, do buy presents.