The Giving Up/ Cutting Down alcohol support thread - number 13

Honey_Bear

So frustrating, Satchmo! Still, you know you did it. Well done.

lincs1205 wrote: »

Hi please could I join. I would like 31 AFD for October please. Thankyou.:D

Welcome Lincs!

smallholdingsister wrote: »

28 days AF and I thought I would share!

Feeling brighter, more optimistic, my mind is clearer.
Waking feeling so much better and not wanting to sleep after lunch.
Losing the weight gained when drinking <snip> everyday without really trying to lose it.
My appetite has much reduced though I want sweet things more and fatty foods less.

I would be interested to hear anyone else's experiences past the month mark.

The sugar cravings still haven't gone away, 14 months later! I can lose weight if I cut back to porridge for breakfast, soup for lunch and eat a light meal in the evenings but OH and I don't live like that, so I only shrink when he's away for a few days. However, I managed to lose all the weight I'd gained in the previous 10 years after giving up smoking within about eight months of stopping drinking by going sugar-free for a month or so. It can be done. My weight's now stable and while I'd like to lose another stone in an ideal world I'm not going to fret about it and I'd certainly never diet. I'm pretty active but I don't do any sports, so I seem to have found an equilibrium that suits me.

After the first fortnight or so of going AF, my sleep patterns had stablized to 'zonked out all night' and have stayed that way. Everything got better - skin, mood stability, my relationship with my OH, just everything. I know I still felt tired, utterly fatigued all the time, but I think on reflection that was probably because I was eating too much bread, pasta and couscous, so I've cut right back which has helped enormously. 28 days is absolutely brilliant, and if you're losing weight without trying to, you're obviously getting the balance totally right. Good on you!

Amongst the bloggers who have succeeded in stopping drinking the consensus seems to be that if we try to do too much too soon, like losing weight on top of stopping drinking, it can be too tough.

27/30 please, Shaggy.

Sandypan

Hi all, haven't posted for a few days but sticking with it and declaring 25/29 for today! Sleeping better and generally more alert and happy, feel proud with myself but agree with smallholingsister about the sweet tooth. Last night before bed raided the biscuit tin and had 3 large cookies and some rocky road! Need to do what Honeybear does and be sugar free as well!
Lost count of OH AFD but he is doing really well as well and hasn't had a drink in the house at all just one last night when he went out and friends insisted!!
October is going to be more difficult for me because my birthday and on holiday so going to say 21/31 and try to make the 10 days low rather than getting blotto like I used to.
Happy Sunday everyone.

smallholdingsister

Thanks HB for a really helpful post and thanks Sandypan.

It sounds really positive for you both.

HB are you AF alone or does your DH join in?

Barny1979

27 AFDs for today, 169 in a row. Not sure if I will make it to 200 in a row though.

charmed1318

Hi all.

Been reading through your posts and would like to join in please.
No ALDs as it would just spiral. Been AF for 4 days now and would like to pledge 31 days in October (and no more in September either)

One day at a time

Honey_Bear

Sandypan wrote: »

Need to do what Honeybear does and be sugar free as well!

Cripes! I can only last a week or so sugar-free but when I do that's when I shrink - I don't want to give the impression I'm sugar-free all the time! I do find, though, that the more sugar I eat, the more I want, so when OH is going to be away, like now, I don't buy anything too tempting (she said, hiding the hazelnut chocolate, halva, greek delight ....)

Wretched L!dl offers.

smallholdingsister wrote: »

Thanks HB for a really helpful post and thanks Sandypan.

It sounds really positive for you both.

HB are you AF alone or does your DH join in?

My pleasure, Small Holding Sister. OH doesn't have a problem moderating and we live within spitting distance of a cross channel ferry, so our usual practice has been to go to France and stock up on wine. We've got gallons of the stuff lying around. We also live next door to a gin distillery.

I knew when I made the decision to stop that OH would never, ever stop drinking (and why should he just because I have a problem with it?) so no, he's not joining me. We've both noticed that he's probably drinking a third or, at most, only half of the amount he used to drink when we were drinking together, and most nights stops after one glass of wine. He has more over the weekends. It doesn't bother me, it simply couldn't right from the start and I was absolutely determined that I was never, ever going to have a problem with other people drinking, so I haven't.

That doesn't, however, mean I don't notice it. We recently spent some time with the couple I would describe as our best friends, a pub quiz on Thursday night and then brief a weekend away. I was absolutely horrified when I realised they drank four bottles of wine on the Thursday evening between them, and then did the same on Saturday afternoon/evening plus a G&T or two. It's not that I mind them getting or being drunk (although everyone's boring when they're that drunk and I'm sober); it was that I realised they have been increasing the amount they drink very gradually for a long time, what they were doing is normal for them and I have a horrible feeling that they're drinking is out of control. He's seriously overweight and she's on the thin side, they're in their fifties, stressed out by their jobs and I want them to be around for a very long time. (I've just lost a good, very clean-living friend at 64; seriously obese but a lovely, lovely man.)

I'm seriously worried for both of them and there's nothing, absolutely nothing, I can say or do. I know exactly how I would have reacted if any of my friends had mentioned my drinking to me, and I know this couple well enough to know they'd be furious, mortified, and very unforgiving of my seeming holier than though attitude. There simply isn't a way to say it that won't sound wrong.

OH only ever said anything about my drinking when I'd seriously over-stepped the mark; he never even suggested I should cut down / try to control it / need to stop. It was entirely my decision to stop because the last time I drank even I knew my behaviour was unacceptable and from the amount of reading around the subject of alcohol I had realised that if I didn't already have a serious problem, sooner or later it would become serious. In the end when I stopped I found out that I wasn't addicted because I had no withdrawal symptoms per se but the first two weeks were difficult because of the lack of energy - which was probably down to the lack of sugar. Once past those two weeks it's just got better and better and better.

My current treat to ram home the benefits of not drinking is to use the money I would have spent on booze for evening and Saturday classes. I went to the first plastering course class yesterday and absolutely loved it! I now reckon if you can ice a cake, you can learn to plaster.

Too much information, probably, but that's where I am with not drinking right now.

Honey_Bear

charmed1318 wrote: »

Hi all.

Been reading through your posts and would like to join in please.
No ALDs as it would just spiral. Been AF for 4 days now and would like to pledge 31 days in October (and no more in September either)

One day at a time

Welcome Charmed! Four days is a great, great start. Good on you.

charmed1318

Thank you Honeybear.

smallholdingsister

HB that is fantastic. I guess all you can do for your mates is lead the way as you are doing.

You are so right about drunks being boring when one hasn't joined them!

debjay

20/20 for tonight please.