The Giving Up/ Cutting Down alcohol support thread - number 13

Honey_Bear

shaggydoo wrote: »

I have been doing really rubbish tbh but hoping to course correct tonight.

That's most unlike you, Shaggy. I hope things are back on an even keel really soon.

Have a lovely holiday, Maman.

I hope the freelance project ends satisfactorily CathyBird and you have a lovely rest. 11/21 is a satisfying number by the 13th of the month.

Green Karen I don't know what to say, I really don't, but you've posted about your mother's situation, so I'll see if I can come up with some sugggestions.

Becoming someone's full time carer is not something that can be decided in an instant in the middle of a crisis. I totally understand why your mother needs support now to tide her over, but please don't allow yourself to be forced into a situation over which you seem to have no control.

Your mother is ENTITLED to care, but it's easy enough for people to fall between the health service and social services (provided by councils) if people don't chase it up. I'm frantically trying to remember how we found out what support my parents could have (terminal cancer, Parkinson's, so both of them needed a lot of support) and I think the GP's surgery co-ordinated the care package.

The hospital will have issued a discharge letter to the GP surgery, so they will be aware that she needs suppport. It sounds as though you will need to follow it up. Try the Citizen's Advice Bureau and start thinking about writing to you MP, whoever they are, whichever party they are. Ultimately whatever your mother needs will come down to money, and if people don't make their MP aware of how broken the system is, nothing will ever change.

If you are going to become a full time carer, please find your local carer's support group. I'd have gone completely mad without them.

When I was a full time carer my parents claimed Attendance Allowance and I think I was entitled to claim some kind of benefit, which may only have been having my national insurance paid, but that meant that those years counted towards my pension. You need to talk to the Citizens Advice Bureau to find out what you can claim and how to do so. They can help fill in the forms because what you say and how you say it affects the claim. My father had an Occupational Therapist and she was an absolute godsend - she understood the ramifications of all of the questions and told me how to phrase the answers. We neither exaggerated nor understated any of the answers but I didn't know how to answer some questions without some guidance.

The rules [STRIKE]may[/STRIKE] will have changed, but back in 2000 when we phoned up to ask for the forms for Attendance Allowance, we had a few weeks to fill them in and once we did, the payment was BACKDATED to date we phoned to ask for the forms. Very important you make that call asap.

Good luck with it and I suggest you have a read on the benefit boards about how to go about this. It's complicated as you may have realised but you can break it down into manageable chunks with a bit of help.

13/30 please, Shaggy.

Barny1979

12/25 AFDs today

fakeplastictwee

Hello! Well I went away to think about my target and never came back, oops! I will go back and read through the thread in a minute, hope everybody is doing OK.

I never did manage to decide on a target, and I haven't been TOTALLY on top of counting this months AFDs so far but I do know that I have done at least 7. So I will go for declaring 7/TF for tonight please.

I'm heading to Glastonbury festival a week today, so realistically only that week to continue adding up the AFDs, so will stay target free this month I think.

CuppaTea

7/17 please shaggy.

Poor_Single_lady

7/25 please

Sorry to read about your Mum GreenKaren. HB does talk a lot of sense, I hope you can put things in place for her but obviously is not easy.

Arkers

Good morning everyone,
7 AFd please Shaggy.
Lost the plot this last week now off on holiday.
Hugs and love for those that need it.
Arkers x

shaggydoo

Honey_Bear wrote: »

That's most unlike you, Shaggy. I hope things are back on an even keel really soon.

Thanks! I notched up 2 for Monday and Tuesday and there is still a lot of month left to repair the damage.

I'll be back to add AFDs when the page flips over.



Shaggyx

Honey_Bear

(((Hugs))) Green Karen. If you need to vent you can PM me at any time. From what I can remember of the first few weeks, they were pretty full-on. I ended up on Prozac after a month, which is why I'm so concerned. And it's also when my drinking went out of control.

Buy a plastic undersheet for your mother's bed. I found them on Ebay.

14/30 please, Shaggy.

Honey_Bear

Morning Shaggy! You're sounding much more like your normal self. Good on you.

cathybird

Morning all, 13/21 for me today. Thanks Honey Bear for your kind words. x