Help with house after separating

sappersmum

Apologies for duplicate post, I don't know how to link it yet and lady suggested I ask for help on here.

Hi can anyone please help me. My husband and I are separating and I don't know what to do or where I stand with my house and benefits etc. He is an alcoholic and I can't take any more. The house is in my name as I have been here 30 years. We have been married 10 years and that is when he moved in, although been together more like 16/17 years. All bills in my name except sky and talk talk. I am long term registered disabled and get DLA and ESA I think it is called now. Can he make me sell the house? Am so scared. Thanks sappers mum

~Beanie~

Sorry I can't help but here is a link to your previous thread: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4859975

BitterAndTwisted

Yes, he could claim on the equity increase since you married ten years ago if he can prove that he contributed an equal share of the mortgage payments. But in order to do that he would have to take you to court and persuade a judge that he's entitled to it. Going to court costs money, quite a lot of it and most of that will have to be paid in advance for any solicitor to advise him. How likely do you think this is?

One thing I would warn you against is to go ahead with divorce proceedings without coming to a formal, written agreement about the financial settlement.

theartfullodger

Forcing sale is possible but (understandably) takes a long time & is complicated - so an alcoholic might not manage that.

see.. here for good advice
http://england.shelter.org.uk/get_advice/relationship_breakdown/options_for_homeowners/preventing_a_sale

If you spend £3 with landregistry online you can find out what the deeds say right now...
http://www.landregistry.gov.uk/
Suggest you go see your local CaB

& 'phone Shelter, the experts on housing, on their **free** helpline 0808 800 4444

Best wishes, hope things get better

sappersmum

I know the deeds are in my name only as I was married over 20 years ago and bought the house off my ex at the time. I have maintained the house and paid the mortgage but cannot say he didn't pay into the household. I don't think he would take me to court but things happen when you split up I know from my last marriage his family got involved and I had death threats etc and have a lifetime injunction against members of his family so I am under no illusion as this is going to be easy. He has drank every penny he has and I have a few thousand in my name in an account which was a present off my dad. Would I get help with the mortgage etc as I said I am on DLA and ESA and registered disabled.

Guest101

When u marry everything u own is joint, so start at 50/50 split and try to get more

sappersmum

Oh that's going to be tough. We are splitting up because if his drinking etc. so I have to give him half of a house I have lived in 30 years. Where am I supposed to go?

BigAunty

Guest101 wrote: »

When u marry everything u own is joint, so start at 50/50 split and try to get more

You are talking pants. This is a woman in an abusive relationship - give her a break.

Guest101

BigAunty wrote: »

You are talking pants. This is a woman in an abusive relationship - give her a break.

My post wasn't rude at all. When u go to divorce the judge and solicitors will start at a 50/50 split and then negotiate depending on ownership etc.

Guest101

sappersmum wrote: »

Oh that's going to be tough. We are splitting up because if his drinking etc. so I have to give him half of a house I have lived in 30 years. Where am I supposed to go?

No it's unlikely you'll give him half, tho he will get some I would think.

But they will start at 50/50 and work from there

BitterAndTwisted

You may not have to give him half. There's absolutely no point in getting into a flat spin about something which may never happen. Easy to say and hard to do, I know.