Elite christmas special

thick_tom

two women were on a night out together and after getting drunk set off walking home. after a while they wanted a pee but the only place offering privacy was a cemetry. they walked inside and it was pitch black. one woman fumbled about and managed to lose her knickers. the other woman bent down and a sharp object jabbed at her bottom.
the next day the two husbands met. one of them told the other that he wouldnt be letting hs wife go out again as she had come home without her knickers. the other man said that he also wouldnt be letting his wife out on her own again as when he pulled the bedclothes back this morning he had found a little square card stuck to her bottom. on it were the words 'thanks for all the good times ..................................from the fire brigade lads'

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Mrs_stinkface

Bubbs and SFSB you lucky lucky beggars :T:T:T
I'm well jel, I've got one order that has yet to be cancelled so there is still hope. It's only got 3 things on it. Better than a kick up the bum though (hopefully)

Earlier I updated my Facebook status saying that I was chilling in bed watching a movie stuffing my face. (Riveting stuff I know ) someone I used to work with like 15 odd years ago started instant chatting me and started getting all smarmy and sleazy.
Urghh totally not interested but it's left me feeling a bit yucky. His missus only had a baby about 6 months ago, he can blatantly see I'm married with a kid. My walls plastered with piccy's of the hubby and boy.
Totally not the bloke I remember from years ago. Funny how you can change your opinion of someone in an instant

bubbs

Jelly_Biactol wrote: »

I thought I'd share this, for all the craft-y people on here. It's the Christmas card from my sister, and hand-made by her too. It was my favourite card, and not just 'cos it's from my little sis.:xmassmile
It's plain card (cream colour works best, she says), with a personal message using one of those label-makers. She says the black labels work best, rather than red (which I first thought would be better) - more retro, she says.
Plus envelope - the envelopes to fit the card, or the card cut to size to fit the envelopes.
She made them for all her family and friends, with different personalised messages. She's even got a rubber stamp made, 'Made with love by

---

', to put on the back.
It's one of those "Why didn't I think of that?" ideas,and really effective, I think.
It would work for any kind of greetings card.
She also made Christmas tree decorations for everyone as well.

I would never of thought to do a crd like that, very good:T:T:T

Jelly_Biactol

bubbs wrote: »

Im soooooooooo excited this is my biggest glitch EVER!!:T:T

Just remind me, how excited are you?

rhosynbach

thick_tom wrote: »

sorry rhos you failed on number three :eek:

oh tom i am heartbroken, went against all my principles to feed you on finest venison and you cast me aside :rotfl:

for everyone i can shoot but nothing living was only joking

purpledonkey

Evening all. Wow 41 pages to catch up on! Either I've missed a glitch or Thick Tom has a bucket load of sick inducing proposals on here (just teasing, also not in the queue, am happily single for the time being! ). May have to put on a film whilst I catch up!

thick_tom

rhosynbach wrote: »

oh tom i am heartbroken, went against all my principles to feed you on finest venison and you cast me aside :rotfl:

for everyone i can shoot but nothing living was only joking

i am a veggie


......... but thanks for caring

davemorton

Mrs_stinkface wrote: »

Bubbs and SFSB you lucky lucky beggars :T:T:T
I'm well jel, I've got one order that has yet to be cancelled so there is still hope. It's only got 3 things on it. Better than a kick up the bum though (hopefully)

Earlier I updated my Facebook status saying that I was chilling in bed watching a movie stuffing my face. (Riveting stuff I know ) someone I used to work with like 15 odd years ago started instant chatting me and started getting all smarmy and sleazy.
Urghh totally not interested but it's left me feeling a bit yucky. His missus only had a baby about 6 months ago, he can blatantly see I'm married with a kid. My walls plastered with piccy's of the hubby and boy.
Totally not the bloke I remember from years ago. Funny how you can change your opinion of someone in an instant

Did he start asking how you were with farm animals in a cold wood with no milk for the coffee???

Savvybuyer

Westvleteren wrote: »

10p pizza anyone?

For those that have the DrO coupons.....Thanks to total couponery on fb :beer:



Surely you're all sick of the sight of pizza by now though?

Edit are the shops open on the 1st? as you only have a day.....

I can see why 'buy in Sains.' now, as re-reading and found the coupon valid from 1st Jan. May be Morries at £1.49 on the Oetkers a little into 2014 (the Oetkers were on offer this week but when are they on offer to?:think:). Avs Morries - also be v. careful as Morries have less of a range - I don't think they have the Haiwaiian or the Vegetale. So Pepperoni-Salame and fingers crossed! Are Oetker Pizzas ending 29/12 in M or 5/1?

thick_tom

EMMAP wrote: »

Picky so-and-so :rotfl:

I have a half blind deaf cat. I can't milk a cow but I can gut and fillet a fish. If I was stuck in the forest I'd use you for warmth! Or as a human shield. Floflo has a gun you know.

i dont eat fish - prefer to let them swim around happily

lots of extra points though for the cuddle

dont worry about flos gun - i have super powers that can bend the gun barrel and shoot the bullets into the ground