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how much money do you need to start a family?

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Hi all, I know the above question is a bit "how long is a piece of string?" but just looking for some general guidelines as I don't see how it is ever going to be possible for us :s

I am 30, OH is 31, we are getting married in July 2014, we have a mortgage of £149,000 (currently pay £609 p/m), I earn £29K per year (no benefits or maternity pay etc etc), OH is self employed, income is not regular but a conservative average yearly figure is about £16K before tax.

We're not really big spenders, biggest expense is our mortgage, but I just wonder how much having children actually costs, mainly childcare I guess (as I would only get statutory MP - I'm not sure how much that is but don't think its a lot?). Anybody got any thoughts on whether this is do-able or not??:):o:o
big bad debts: Gone!
[Mortgage: [STRIKE]£152,864 [/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£150,805[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£149,000[/STRIKE] £145,000 [/STRIKE][/STRIKE]:eek: £215,000:eek:
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  • Errata
    Errata Posts: 38,230 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    What happens if for some reason you're unable to re-commence employment after the birth?
    .................:)....I'm smiling because I have no idea what's going on ...:)
  • You will still get statutory maternity pay but I don't know either how much that is. A quick google would tell you I should think. And also you will also get child benefit which for your first child works out at just over 1k per year.

    To be honest the how long is a piece of string answer is slightly relevant but also relevant is the 'if you really want a baby you'll make any financial scenario work whatever the cost' argument.

    If you really want a baby you could start putting little bits of money every month into a high interest ISA which will give you a starter fund?

    I can't answer the childcare question I'm afraid but if you'll be taking your legally entitled 12 months maternity, you won't need to worry about that for at least 2 years even if you start trying in the next few months! Again the separate savings would come in handy.

    Sorry I'm biased because I'm pregnant with my first and my hormones are making me slightly baby gaga! My OH and I don't even have the house yet, we weren't initially going to have a baby until we had brought a place, but now we've got a baby on the way we will be scraping our pennies together and buying somewhere in the next couple of months. Of course we are panicking - but we've got each other and we will make it work whatever happens, so I wouldn't worry!

    It also helps if you've got got support around you - do you have family, close friends who could help out in terms of hand me downs, child care, etc?
    Our first baby due 25th May 2014 :T

    Maternity leave fund: £3000/£6000 :T
  • I don't know Errata, this is why I am asking.
    big bad debts: Gone!
    [Mortgage: [STRIKE]£152,864 [/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£150,805[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£149,000[/STRIKE] £145,000 [/STRIKE][/STRIKE]:eek: £215,000:eek:
  • Also who is your mortgage with? That's a blooming low monthly payment for a 149k mortgage! (Sorry I'm being selfish and picking up information for myself now!!)
    Our first baby due 25th May 2014 :T

    Maternity leave fund: £3000/£6000 :T
  • Thanks mysecretalias :)

    I think you're right, I guess it does all come down to "you just make it work". I have one friend with children and she has always said "theres never a right time"and I guess that's true as well.

    I have my mum and aunty who are both about 25miles away and would help out when they could. OH's mum is about 100miles away but I think she would help out by coming to stay sometimes.

    Congrats on your pregnancy, you have a lovely attitude about it and are obviously very happy - good luck!!!!!:T
    big bad debts: Gone!
    [Mortgage: [STRIKE]£152,864 [/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£150,805[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£149,000[/STRIKE] £145,000 [/STRIKE][/STRIKE]:eek: £215,000:eek:
  • mysecretalias - it is with Accord; I think the word on the street is that they are pretty much the best around at the moment; check them out!!!
    big bad debts: Gone!
    [Mortgage: [STRIKE]£152,864 [/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£150,805[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£149,000[/STRIKE] £145,000 [/STRIKE][/STRIKE]:eek: £215,000:eek:
  • krustylouise
    krustylouise Posts: 1,501 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    edited 2 December 2013 at 6:49PM
    Like your friend has mentioned there's never a right time. You can plan until you're all planned out but things change. My ex and I had been together for a long time, he had a ft and 1 pt job, I had 1 ft and 2 pt jobs. We lived together had savings etc. We planned DD. 18months later we split, I had PN depression and agoraphobia. I had to go it alone, get a new job (I left mine due to depression etc).

    If it feels right, I say go for it. Good luck

    PAD 2023 Debt total as of Dec 2022 £18,988.63*April £17,711.03

    Halifax CC £3168.21

    Halifax loan £6095.47

    Car finance £7639.02

    Next £0/£808.33


    #22 - 1p savings challenge 2023 £166.95/£667.95

    Saving for Christmas - £1 a day savings challenge 2023 £50/£1000

  • Like your friend has mentioned there's never a right time. You can plan until you're all planned out but things change. My ex and I had been together for a long time, he had a ft and 1 pt job, I had 1 ft and 2 pt jobs. We lived together had savings etc. We planned DD. 18months later we split, I had PN depression and agoraphobia. I had to go it alone, get a new job (I left mine due to depression etc).

    If it feels right, I say go for it. Good luck


    Sorry to hear that things didn't go to plan for you. I guess you are right though, best made plans and all that...you just never know what is going to happen.

    Hope everything is going well for you and your daughter now?
    big bad debts: Gone!
    [Mortgage: [STRIKE]£152,864 [/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£150,805[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]£149,000[/STRIKE] £145,000 [/STRIKE][/STRIKE]:eek: £215,000:eek:
  • fluffnutter
    fluffnutter Posts: 23,179 Forumite
    I applaud people's forethought but it says something about our cost of living crisis when a couple who earn £45K worry about being able to afford a baby.
    "Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell" - Edward Abbey.
  • Errata
    Errata Posts: 38,230 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I don't know Errata, this is why I am asking.
    Fair enough, in that case you need to do a robust risk assessment.
    .................:)....I'm smiling because I have no idea what's going on ...:)
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