Want to stay in bed forever ....

Struggle1234

I have no idea how to begin this so I will just start my story.

I am in my early 40's, separated with 2 wonderful kids I am also , it would seem , an idiot. I am in a terrible financial mess - some of it fall out from the ex (who I am on good terms with) some of it is later mess from the endless struggle to keep my head above water.

I now owe £1400 in PDL and I can't see a way out other than staying in my bed and never getting up , which I can't do because of my kids who are my whole world. I have a full time job which is paid well - I just need an end to this cycle of horror. I don't know whether to bite the bullet this month ... I have 10 days till the payments are due - this month will wipe out everything plus some of my bills money.

I have a current acct of course, also a linked savings acct with a cash card and have just applied for a pre paid credit card. I could buy some time as my payments on PDL aren't due until 2 days after pay day so I could move money straight out and start from there.

I feel physically sick as I type , I haven't slept (again) and am trying to fight tears this morning whilst trying to get youngest off to school.

Any advice would be appreciated please.

More than anything I want my kids to be proud of me and to be safe and happy. I just need to start somewhere.

davenport151

Hi Struggle 1234, sorry to hear of your situation.
You know the best thing you can do for your kids to make them proud is just to be there for them and for them to see you going to work to support them:)
I cannot offer you much advice but do recommend you post a statement of affairs on the 'want to be debt free' board. Then you can see all incomings/outgoings and you should get sound advice on any cutbacks you can do.
Good luck - your kids are lucky to have you!

parsniphead

Good morning struggle1234

Well done for posting and welcome.

I think everyone on this board has felt how you do at one time or another. I know it seems impossible but as Martin says no debt is unable to be sorted.

As davenport says one of the best things you can do is post your SOA on here and some very knowledgable will be along with comments on how to cut your outgoings.

I can't offer advice about PDL as I have never had one, perhaps only as they weren't readily available when I got into problems.

Remember if you stay in bed today the problems will still be there tomorrow. Get started today and you will be ahead.

Good luck

Parsnip x

lovely-cup-of-tea

Hi Struggle, I couldn't read and run and just wanted to tell you that you're not alone. This is a great support network, it can be a bit tough sometimes but we're all here for you in some way or another. A Statement of Account (SOA) is a terrific way to start, writing it all down means it's out of your head and onto (virtual)paper.

There's lots of help out there including Credit Unions who helped me out of a really tight spot just last month.

You sound like you've had your lightbulb moment so you won't be in trouble forever.

Good luck and keep us posted.

DancerSupreme

Hiya. Won't read and run.

Firstly you need to check that the PDL aren't going to take funds from your account. A lot of people come in to work with this problem and it leaves you with nothing. Can you set up a payment plan? Maybe contact CAB about them?

It might be worth a call to StepChange. Or some kind of debt management plan? Only use a charity one though as they do not charge for their services.

Have you got an SOA as the others have said? Are you at work today?

xxx

Mara_uk7

Ok, Just stop and breathe. Do your SOA, or at very least make a list of the individual debts, Dont think of them as one huge debt, more as chunks of little debt to be nibbled away, Do you have anything you can sell ? Either E*ay or on the free Facebook selling pages ?
Can your ex help ?
Dont panic, you can do this, Many of us on here have been in a similar situation, and indeed much worse, but there is a great support network here and lots of good advice to be had.
Dont bury your head in the sand, you only get sand in your ears and things get much worse... Good luck

sourcrates

Hi,
Right, you need to regain control of the situation, you should take steps to do this straight away, now, today.

Leave the statement of affairs till later, that can wait.

Are the PDL`s your only debt that's causing trouble ?

If so then :

First thing to do is contact your bank and revoke the constant payment authority which allows lenders to use your debt card details to debt your account, as a back up, you can ring the banks lost/stolen card line and tell them you have lost your card, you will be issued a new card, with new details, which none of your lenders will have the details of, (this does work, done it myself).

Secondly, when your paid, I would move the money to your secondary account, as a precaution as some lenders don't always follow the rules, also watch for unauthorised direct debts, that's another way an unscrupulous lender will attempt to get there money from you.

Third, write to your lenders explaining you cant afford the repayments, some allow you to do this online, on there websites, check there first, make an offer of payment you can afford, ignore if they ask for more, just pay what you can afford, no more, no less, you may need to ask them for bank details, or an address to send a cheque or postal order, DONT PAY WITH YOUR DEBT/CREDIT CARD AS THEY CAN AND WILL TAKE THE FULL AMOUNT YOU OWE USING THOSE DETAILS.

Fourth, be prepared for calls, letters, texts etc after you default, never speak on phone to them, do everything in writing or bt email.

Fourth, don't worry about it, pay what you can over a period of time that suits you, not them, it will soon be paid off, if you follow these simple steps you WILL stop them taking all your money, its not rocket science, you just need to know the right approach to take.

Lastly, don't ever take out a payday loan again, good luck.

ReginaII

The above is good advice........as long as you don't work in a profession where your employment would be affected, i.e. Police, Finance etc.

National_Debtline

ReginaII wrote: »

The above is good advice........as long as you don't work in a profession where your employment would be affected, i.e. Police, Finance etc.

Hi there

The advice from sourcrates above is very sound. There's no reason to believe that taking these sorts of steps will have any impact on OP's employment, regardless of profession. The employer will have no knowledge of what is happening and that will remain the case unless something drastic like a bankruptcy petition occurs.

Best

Dennis @ NDL.

ReginaII

National_Debtline_representative wrote: »

Hi there

The advice from sourcrates above is very sound. There's no reason to believe that taking these sorts of steps will have any impact on OP's employment, regardless of profession. The employer will have no knowledge of what is happening and that will remain the case unless something drastic like a bankruptcy petition occurs.

Best

Dennis @ NDL.

Some employers run credit checks and will know about defaults, CCJ's etc. The OP may well not be employed in any kind of capacity that would be affected however, it is gross misinformation to suggest that defaults and CCJs do not impact certain professions.

sourcrates

ReginaII wrote: »

Some employers run credit checks and will know about defaults, CCJ's etc. The OP may well not be employed in any kind of capacity that would be affected however, it is gross misinformation to suggest that defaults and CCJs do not impact certain professions.

Well in that case the employer would find out anyway at some point, either way if there is no money to pay the debts the default will be registered whatever the OP`s employment situation, my advice above still stands unless the OP tells us otherwise.