Just discovered the extent of partner's debt. Help me.

LannieDuck

hs122 wrote: »

I went on his barclaycard accounts online tonight and looked at his statements and he hasn't spent anything on it for months from before we found out I was pregnant, so I know it's true that he hasn't been using them at all.

Does that mean he's been living within his means for the last few months (if we ignore the debts...)? That's actually quite encouraging.

cte1111

That's good that's he's stopped using the cards.

From you SOA, the obvious areas to cut back are Sky, cinema cards and mobile phones. Are you able to cut down on your sky package? I know this isn't what your partner would like ideally, but with £5k of debt to pay off, a baby on the way and a decrease in income from maternity leave, it's for sacrifices like this. Is your mobile phone out of contract? If so, then switch to the cheapest possible PAYG plan.

hs122

kazwookie wrote: »

hi

Make sure any debts that are his are in his name only!

Your SOA has nothing for food.

Sorry, we spend between £100-120 a month on food. I bulk buy, meal plan and cook from scratch.

hs122

cte1111 wrote: »

That's good that's he's stopped using the cards.

From you SOA, the obvious areas to cut back are Sky, cinema cards and mobile phones. Are you able to cut down on your sky package? I know this isn't what your partner would like ideally, but with £5k of debt to pay off, a baby on the way and a decrease in income from maternity leave, it's for sacrifices like this. Is your mobile phone out of contract? If so, then switch to the cheapest possible PAYG plan.

I am going to ring up Sky on my next day off (Thursday) and ask about cutting down the sky package, however we've only had it for 3 months and am not sure if we're tied into a contract? The cinema cards were taken out in May (just before we found out I was pregnant) and are a 12 month contract. My phone is paid for by my grandad and I can see if I get DP onto a cheaper phone contract as I think he is tied into a contract he will have to pay to leave.

thatwilldo

Looked at your budget and 460 before shopping is not a lot so you are doing really well saving around 250 per month - well done.

Cinema card I would ditch that's 30.

Remember to budget weekly for DDs and round up, that's a great way to start building your buffer/reduce your overdraft.

Car 204 is 10% of your income - can you do anything to reduce this?

If you pay your ctax over 10 months then feb and mar will be paymt free plan what you need to do with extra 135 each month and use it properly.

Can you not reduce your petrol? Again budget for this weekly and try to save a few pounds each week, you will be surprised how it mounts up.

Phone Sky explain the position (new baby reduced income etc) see if they will do a deal with line rental/ Internet as this could reduce your bill.

You (or your partner) need to set aside an amount for the Overdraft every month. Then ask the bank to reduce when you hit certain milestones.

Looking at your finances other than the credit cards/car/cinema its hard to find any real savings.

Good news that spending is not continuing on cards, take this as a positive.

Ultimately as I keep saying - you need to work together on this. You have to treat it jointly for me despite what people say here. You are about to become a family, so approach things that way.

Also, remember you will be limited by your reduced income in the comings months. The solution will take more than one year to start bearing fruit.

cookyy2k

I don't think it's DMP time quite yet but if some cuts aren't made and money payed off debts it could quickly become time, especially with household income reducing.

I got into exactly the cycle you describe with the cards getting higher and the overdraft being used more and more each month until one month everything I was juggling went over it's limit and I then set up my DMP before I started struggling to pay my rent, electricity etc.

Also just my thoughts on the holiday you may be in a worse financial position come March with the maternity leave and a little one to feed so certainly do not pay anything else towards the holiday, put it in a savings account and pay it off on the deadline. That way if you don't manage to get it all together you can cancel and only lose your deposit not deposit + what you have already payed in (Take a look at the T&Cs and see if that's the way they do it, certainly it was the last time I had a holiday on this basis)

Katzen

Then in that case I would still advise you to keep hold of your money as then YOU have control of it if/when you need it. If he is making minimum payments the balances will come down eventually and maybe he will have his light bulb moment, as someone else said. It won't be an easy road for him (or you) but you will get there. Good luck

strandedinaber

Not sure I have anything useful to add, but I just wanted to say congratulations on your pregnancy, and good luck to the both of you in tackling the debt It's great that your partner has been living within his means for the past month, and that you've managed to save. The only thing I can suggest is maybe try reducing your grocery bill a bit - budget to lose £10 a month. Until maybe just before you are due, when you will probably want to stock up the freezer with as many pre-cooked healthy meals as possible. Agree that Sky would be a good place to cut. Can you maybe compromise and go to Freeview but also take out an account with a DVD rental place? Those go for around £6 a month minimum so gives you a bit of luxury at a much reduced price.

hs122

I'm going to bed feeling a lot more positive, so thank you all for that to be fair to my partner, before we found out I was pregnant in May he was in his overdraft by £1000. By the time we moved in together in September (I got pregnant just as I was finishing sixth form so weren't living together) his bank account was back to 0. He is only in his overdraft by 300 max at any point but I just hate knowing that he's in the red rather than the black, and worry that it will spiral out of control when my income drops.

thatwilldo

Morning

I think this shows your partner has been making an effort and you have a platform to go forward with.

Good luck