desperately seeking support.

milocat

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Me,DDand2cats

Didn't want to read and run you can do it I'm in a similar situation as my b/f has just ran and left me in a load of debt, I feel lost at the moment maybe counselling would be good just a thought I hope you find some happiness in all the darkness x

Bex296

Hi milocat, so sorry to hear you've had such a bad year. Just a quick post to say I really hope things improve for you, and good luck with the debt! It's amazing how much money goes on random stuff when you sit down and work it all out, so good luck sorting things!

milocat

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Little_Miss_Uni-Debt

Hey Milocat,

Things will be ok. Money issues can always be fixed. As you've said you're young and you've been through so much this year.

It's understandable that through the difficulty of 2013 you've had to focus on a different set of priorities. Don't feel bad for that!

I would suggest that with support, rebooting spending habits will reduce stress and allow you to move forward and heal mentally without impacting your progress with your finances.

It will be hard and will take determination but you need to keep your finances in a little protective bubble for a short while.

Doing a full statement of affairs (SOA) would be very useful. It's tough to write it all out and can feel confusing but putting a budget in place means you can rely on their being enough money there for food, getting to work and other essentials and then repayments are made after all that is taken care of.

The SOA template can be found here - after you have filled it in, if you click the MSE button, then copy/paste the results up in this thread you will get a lot of good advice that you can put into action.

We all demonstrate affection by buying gifts / meals out. However there are lots of other ways to show you care without spending. Writing a list of ways to show kindness, give & receive support with less £'s can help you to have a new way to treat yourself and your partner. These could be a special meal at home, making gifts, home-made picnic, leaving notes for each other.

Remember that cutting back isn't forever and there's nothing wrong with making a list of plans for what you want to aim towards.

Once you have your budget sorted then see how much room you have to make progress with your debts. Keep us updated, you know you will get plenty of support here!

milocat

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milocat

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misselvis

Ladies it will come good. I appreciate it isn't always easy to hear or believe but you have made the first step and it is so brave to put it out there- how you are feeling, where you want to be and your willingness to accept and embrace change. You have a family/ community here that will be around to support you through the good and the bad.

All the best

Spinningthewheels

Hey. I also didn't want to look and run!

I've had my proper LBM recently as well...when I took out my second payday loan also! One thing that has helped me this month is checking my online banking every day like you said. I used to just stick my head in the sand and check it when I really had too, but this month I feel a bit more in control. I've also tracked every penny with an App on my phone, so I can finally see where it all goes! Good luck and I hope everything works out!

milocat

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milocat

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