Househusbands

NansKitchen

Can anyone tell me what the legal rights are of a househusband when a relationship breaks down? When the grandchildren were born, my son's partner earned more than my son so they decided it would be best if she continued to work and my some became a stay-at-home dad, looking after the home and children. Now the relationship has broken down she wants my son to move out of the home. As he has not worked for three years he has no income of his own and no savings, that went on bills a while back. Money is tight for them anyway, as it is for many of us, but was wondering if she has a legal right to throw him out, afterall if she was a stay-at-home mum and my son worked, he couldn't throw her out of the home could he? The way I've put it sounds very cold, I don't mean to, but obviously I am worried about my son. She says he can stay there for a while until he finds somewhere else to live, but without money? Whilst he is looking for a job can claim job seekers? Will they fund him whilst he is looking? What is his legal position? They live in a council house by the way.

Tigsteroonie

I don't know the legal situation but do I presume that she is wanting custody of the child(ren)? If he's been their stay-at-home dad then he might want custody himself.

tinkerbell28

Are they actually married? Not just common law? If so she can;t just throw him out of the marital home.

Who is on the tenancy?

Gigglepig

How old are the children? Do they still need childcare? If so can he suggest she mobes out and he stays with the children, so they still keep the same routine?

Is his name on the tenancy agreement for the council house?

Eta - unless he would have custody of the children, it does not make sense to live in a 3 bed council house while wife and kids move out?
The other thing to keep in mind is if he could support the kids and pay rent living in this house if he did get custody and the wife moved out?

NansKitchen

They are not married, but I think his name is on the rent book but only as living there, not as a partner. I'm sure there is a proper term for that, but I don't know what it is? The children are 10 and 3. The 3 year old has just started nursery school in the mornings, so my son is still expected to pick her up at lunch time. I don't know how he will get a job to support them AND pick the children up from school too? He does want to work, he was a van driver before he became a stay-at-home dad, but he needs to know where he stands legally and financially while he's looking for that job.

fluffnutter

I assume he's on both birth certificates. This will mean he has automatic parental responsibility for the 3 year old, but possibly not for the 10 year old unless he's applied for it.

I suggest he does this first then see about getting decent legal advice if he wants custody. If he doesn't want custody then it's unlikely that a court would rule that he stays whilst his ex and their children have to leave.

Basically, the children's needs are paramount. Who's paid for what and who works when is of far lesser import than who looks after the kids, and as an extension of that, who then gets to live in the family home.

Caz3121

has his partner stated that she expects him to still do the childcare or is she making other arrangements?

zagfles

She seems to be assuming she'll get custody of the children. Does he not want custody? Does he have Parental Responsibility? See http://www.fnf.org.uk/law-and-information/parental-responsibility

If he gets custody he'll be able to claim income support, child ben, child tax credits, probably housing benefit/LHA, and she'll have to pay him child support.

fluffnutter

NansKitchen wrote: »

The 3 year old has just started nursery school in the mornings, so my son is still expected to pick her up at lunch time. I don't know how he will get a job to support them AND pick the children up from school too?

That's for them (your son and his ex) to sort out. A court won't particularly care. It's not the legal profession who's expecting your son to pick his daughter up. TBH, most families have this dilemma, ones where the parents are together and ones where they're not. It's simply the modern headache of balancing work and childcare. If your son has custody and is still struggling to find a job, he will get help from the state.

NansKitchen

My son's name is on the younger child's birth certificate, they registered the birth together. My son isn't actually the father of the older girl, but he has brought her up as his own since she was three. His parter does still expect him to pick up the three year old after nursery school each day. She says he should get night work, but after not working outside the home for three years beggars can't be choosers. My son is willing to work, that isn't the problem, but to fit in with his ex-partners request is. He also needs somewhere to live, are the council obligated to house him whilst he sorts himself out? Reading this back it sounds as if all we're interested in is benefits, but that is not the case. My son is willing to work, it's just that he needs a permanent address to claim Job Seekers - while he's looking for work -
but he needs money to find somewhere to live. It's very messy.

BitterAndTwisted

It's not reasonable for one partner to try to chuck the other out while still expecting them to provide the child-care. He's going to find it very difficult indeed to find full-time employment around such hours unless he works nights. If she's the higher earner I would say that it is for her to make the arrangements and pay for them other than relying on him to provide the necessary child-care. She can't expect to have her cake and eat it, too.

As he's not paid any National Insurance contributions in the last three years he will only be entitled to income-based JSA, and claiming it is going to be an uphill struggle until he has separated from her and found somewhere else to live. While they are still living together as a family the DWP will expected her to support him. Unfortunately it sounds like he's in a Catch-22 situation right now unless he can find some sort of temporary accommodation until the can afford to rent. Once he's working he could qualify for a contribution towards his rent via LHA if he's on a low wage but finding a landlord wiling to rent under such circumstances is probably not going to be easy, to say the least.