Renting or Buying - nightmare decision, please help!!

Lalalemon

Hi Sulphate,

Personally, i'm not that fussed about owning a property, yes it would be lovely, but I don't actually think i'm ready for the responsibility right now. Partner thinks owning a property is the only thing worth considering though!

Thank you for sharing your story, add a little persepective to the situation.

Angie_B

You're budget is good (I think gas/electric and water are a little high but it depends on supplier and usage) however you have forgotten about general day to day living costs.

What about socialising, going out, cinema trips, buying clothes/toiletries, buying birthday/Christmas presents? I think you need to consider a lot more than just the pure living costs of renting together.

sulphate

I don't think £95 contingency money is enough, and you do need something for day to day living costs/little luxuries. If you never go out you'll end up resenting it. We live frugally but we do need a few treats now and again otherwise we'd go mad.

However you could probably drop that food bill substantially. OH and I spend on average £160 a month to include all meals.

Brallaqueen

How about save like mad for 18 months then rent for the final 6 to make sure you are happy to buy together? That way you have the ability to save money in the interim, the relationship will get a good testing and if , in the end, you find you can't live together you both have a cushion of money to fall back on.

boqq_2

Why is everybody worried about the commitment to a mortgage when the OP says she wants a baby? That's definitely more of a commitment. I'd say move as far away as poss from meddling in laws and try to get better jobs.

paddy's_mum

Lalalemon wrote: »

I am also nearly 28 and really keen to start a family


Partner wants us to stay put and save

This is probably the last thing you actually want to hear but if you bought somewhere and then you have a baby, what happens then to your carefully worked out figures? Something would have to give and you could quite conceivably end up being repossessed, and would have thrown away thousands of pounds in lost fees, lost savings ...

It seems to me that you are rushing into this based upon emotional factors. You have never lived together and know perhaps 'not enough' about your partner and yet you want to add a child to the mix. Not a good idea, I promise you. Being a single mum is not a walk in the park.

It seems to me that Brallaqueen's suggestion is a good one, based upon sound commonsense.

Could it be that your partner is sticking to his guns in an effort to hold you back from rushing headlong into a potentially disastrous situation?

Good luck in sorting it out.

dktreesea

Lalalemon wrote: »

Thank you Lindyloo, that is music to my ears!

Now how exactly do I convincer Mr Other Half that this is what we should do, before he went to work this morning he said 'I'm not going to change my mind you know!'

If he is not ready to live with you, why force the issue?

I wouldn't rent. Not with all the things like help to buy and shared ownership/shared equity around. How about buying just half a place and getting a housing association to buy the other half, then, when you can afford it, buying the remainder of the equity?