Work might cost me my home - can't stop worrying

duchy

**Patty** wrote: »

Really?

And yet odd that on this board people are consistently told when they lose tax credits that it's *tough* and you should have *known it was coming*

How ironic.

What ARE you going on about ?
There is a world of difference between knowing you'll lose tax credits when a child leaves FE .....and having a change in income unexpectedly due to no fault of your own ......most people can't foretell the future oddly enough.

I have no sympathy for the former (and was one myself) as it's simply the ostrich approach -children DO grow into adults....not too hard to predict really......but changes in employment come out of the blue sometimes.

bagpussbear

Sorry to hear about your situation OP.

As already suggested, pop over to the old style money saving areas, you may be able to get your bills and expenditure down by £90.

But another idea would be for you and/or your partner to get a second job to make up the shortfall.

When is the next time you are due a payrise, do you get them yearly? so this might be a temporary thing to make up the shortfall?

I hope things will be ok for you.

Prothet_of_Doom

£90 a month ? If you have Sky, a mobile phone, go on holiday, buy kids christmas presents, own a car when you could cycle, have a spare room you could rent out, have free time, you could use to do a second job, if you buy one Costa coffee, go out for one meal every couple of weeks, if you smoke, if you drink in a pub, etc etc. If you can cut down on expenditure, you might find that you are able to find it.

jackieblack

Ok, so you'll be £20 a week worse off for two years. It might seem difficult but there's a good chance that it' not the total disaster you're anticipating.
As has previously been suggested, post a SOA over on the debt free board and you'll get lots of help.
Worst case scenario, in two years time you'll be £2000 in debt, but with the extra £400 a month you'll soon have that paid off.
Panicking is preventing you from seeing this rationally. You need to take a deep breath, step back and look at the bigger picture.

FBaby

It is highly likely that the stress you and and your partner are putting yourself under will have more of a negative impact on your life than losing £90. I struggle to believe that any family when both members are working could not make changes to their lifestyle to cope with the loss of £90 (or a bit less after tax) and avoid losing their home.

It sounds like your biggest downfall is your difficulties with coping with stress. Take a big breath, look into internet information/exercises to learn to deal with stress and look into your budget. The best coping mechanism is to break down issues and focus on finding solutions for each rather than focusing on the end result if you do nothing at all. This is even more important for your partner so she can get back to work asap.

Your first step is to look at your budget. You might be very surprise at the little things you can cut that will amount to £20 a week. Cutting down your food shopping, changing brands for washing powder, shampoo etc..., walking places rather than driving when not essential. Reducing your heating costs by only having it for one hour in the morning and evening (when your partner is back at work) etc...

Don't panic, it is highly unlikely that you won't find a way to cope with £90 less a month.

paulineb_2

CustardAndPickles wrote: »

Well, I guess I should have set up one of the "new" accounts that people do but I don't have the energy

My employer has moved me to a different department where I will lose £90 a month from my salary. This £90 is only paid to people who work in my department due to a particular aspect of our job. So in the new department, my base salary will be the same, but I won't get the £90 because I'm in a different department. I was told Friday night, after everyone had gone home.

I can't afford to lose that much money a month. I will be in the new department a year minimum, realistically longer, but it's still over £1000 and I can't afford to lose it. Realistically losing that amount of money will force me into bankruptcy / IVA etc or even losing my home, I know I live close to the breadline and it's bad but thats where I am.

There is a union at work, and I have spoke to my union rep. He told me that is was my own fault for relying on the £90 as part of my salary as it is classed as "discretionary" rather than "an entitlement". I know he's right but at the same time you can't help relying on it after a while. I wish I didn't have to.

There is a welfare guy where I work. I went to see him today with my partner - my partner and I live together and work for the same employer. My partner says the welfare guy was helpful but I don't remember much because I was basically hysterical with worry. The welfare guy took a detailed financial account from us and says that he will send it to my union who will then see one of the bigwigs where I work to see if they can stop me moving on the grounds that it will financially cripple me.

The welfare guy did not seem very hopeful. The union rep tells me it's my own fault. I have been to the doctors who reluctantly gave me some sleeping tablets and some diazapam but warned me strongly that due to pre-existing medical conditions I should only take them if I really really have to as they could make me very sick. I have taken one of the sleeping tablets - which is what I'm allowed to take - but it's not working.

My partner - who works at the same place - is also off sick with stress. Neither of our immediate supervisors have been in touch with us to check how we are doing which goes to show you the level of care we have from our employer.

In the meantime I am sick with worry all the time since I found out. I am barely eating or drinking and seem to just zone out sometimes, in between the screaming and the crying and the rage that just comes from nowhere.

I don't know what to do any more. My partner says we are in the system for getting it fixed and it is a slow process and we just need to wait. I just feel hopeless. I have tried to go into work twice now just to quit, to make it all stop - I don't have another job to go to or other salary coming in, and my partner says that at least at the moment I'm still being paid so I shouldn't do that.

But I just don't know what to do. Having been through a different procedure at work, I know that they take a very long time. I can't take the worry and uncertainty and I am starting to have worrying thoughts in my head. I am so scared and tired and I don't know what to do any more.

I think theres much more going on for you than just this issue, because if there werent, you wouldnt be hysterically crying and screaming, feeling rage, wanting to quit (which is not the solution, do you really want to end up on benefit and possibly sanctioned due to walking out of a job).

Sounds like you are suffering from stress and anxiety and this is the last straw.

Please put this into perspective. You can save £20 a week. Its achievable. As other people have said, you have options. You could look for other work, a shift a week somewhere, or a christmas job.

Go over to the old style boards as someone said, they'll show how to make savings on food budgets for example (Im not assuming that you arent economising at the moment)

And also, stop pointing the finger of blame at your employer, it wont help and yes the level of care from your employer when you are off with stress might not be the best. Ive been off with stress in the past and not been treated well, but both of you going off sick isnt going to resolve this. If your partner needs help for stress then make sure he gets some.

You could also ask your bank to extend your overdraft and let them know about the circumstances, but please, stop thinking about the worst case scenario and try your best to get back to work. And if work isnt making either of you happy, then start looking for another job.

Dunroamin

Loanranger wrote: »

Well, may be the OP's partner could take on extra work. Got to be better than losing their home, I would have thought.

I thought he was off work with stress.

bylromarha

Another one here saying take a deep breath, post your SOA on debt free board.

I would like to point you towards the up your income board - particularly the mystery shopping and leapforce threads. You could easily make £45 per month doing one or both these things, as could your partner.

Tackle it together. Keep talking. Keep listening to each other. Keep being honest with how you're feeling and support each other in those feelings.

Don't allow your relationship become a victim of this pay cut - keep each other strong.

hazyjo

Can't help other than to reiterate some points above which I was going to suggest. Look for an evening/weekend job. Have either of you any bar experience?

Can you do without a home phone (if you have one)? I rarely use mine. Maybe lose mobiles instead, or share one?

Don't necessarily think things are bargains cos they're reduced. I was buying things like 'bargain' half price toothpaste, or 3 for 2 shampoos, but, actually, it's far cheaper to buy the budget range in Tesco/Boots, etc for 30-odd - up to 50-odd pence!

There are many moneysaving suggestions on this site. Be practical and take control. Don't eat any takeaway foods, even a bag of chips. Lose the sandwiches even, buy ryvita or something and have 3 at a time with something cheap on top. You CAN help yourselves if you know how.

Now is the time to stop the worry. You will feel so much better if you take control now. If you're struggling with that, WE can help. Don't forget to do a very detailed expenditure plan (available here). Don't forget to add anything!

Jx

sassyblue

Any chance of getting your mortgage extended which also reduces payments?

I know it's not ideal because it'll cost you more long term BUT to help get over the next few years until you're better off...? Then you can overpay with that extra £400 you are expecting. The mortage company will charge you for this but you could add it to the balance.

I think it's possible you could cut down by £25 per week somewhere though to avoid that. xx