My mum has passed away

meritaten

OMG - you are having to cope with TWO conflicting emotions! Grief at your mothers passing and joy at the birth of your grandchild!
I don't know how to advise you, except to say that your mum would probably be feeling joy at the birth of her great-grandchild and its acceptable to feel that joy on her behalf.
I just wish I could be with you and let you cry your tears of grief and joy. and its ok to feel both at the same time.

bylromarha

So sorry for the loss of your mum

And massive congrats on the safe birth of your grandchild.

2 years ago my friend lost her dad and had her 3rd baby within 3 days. She said the best piece of advice she was given was to remember that her dad would be smiling too each time she gave her new daughter a cuddle, so she shouldn't be afraid to smile either, or feel guilty about it.

Hug the baby lots. Cry lots. Hug your daughter lots. Know that they are ok with you just being there and not saying anything or doing anything.

And please ring work and speak to your boss. Discuss how you're feeling right now and how you're feeling towards work. There are options - there always are.

When I lost my mum in November, before going back to work, I texted a colleague to let everyone else know that I didn't want people to ask "So how are you?" and I certainly didn't want the tilty head that oft accompanied that question. By knowing that the ground had been prepared in that way made me feel more confident to go back - people weren't going to ask me the biggest thing I could never have answered.

So keep on keeping on chuck. Take each day at a time. Grieve much, enjoy your grandson much and know that whatever you're feeling right now is normal.

All the best x

uk_american

One thing at a time.
Figure out how long work will give you off for you mum.
Then figure out how long for a new baby (if anything).

Also was stuck with an overlapping crisis. (My mum passed and my nan had a heart attack).

Just a matter to figure out the pieces.

nlj1520

Firstly, I am so sorry for your loss. When my mom passed away I was a mess for a while too. I also have a history of clinical depression. Is it worth letting your GP know what has happened so that they are alerted to how you are feeling and maybe can help with time off work?
I agree that you need to let work know what has happened and tell them that you need some time to sort yourself out. But bear in mind that being busy can help.
Secondly, congratulations on your new grandchild. Although you are grieving for your mom, here is a lovely distraction to help you on your path to feeling more normal again.
Your daughter can (hopefully) support you and you can support her. There's a temptation to isolate yourself when grieving deeply, but it will help to have this wonderful new baby to stop that.
My heart goes out to you and I hope things balance out for you soon. Hugs.

thorsoak

{{hugs}} - my thoughts are with you all - and sending condolences and congratulations in plenty. x

harrys_nan

seding you lots of hugs, your emotions must be all over the place at the moment. I'm sure your mum would be over the moon with your new grandson, so enjoy enjoy him and dont be afraid to grieve for your mum.
Have a good cry and remember your mum with love.
Take time out of work and go to the doctors and tell them how you feel
take care
harrys nan

harrys_nan

seding you lots of hugs, your emotions must be all over the place at the moment. I'm sure your mum would be over the moon with your new grandson, so enjoy enjoy him and dont be afraid to grieve for your mum.
Have a good cry and remember your mum with love.
Take time out of work and go to the doctors and tell them how you feel
take care
harrys nan

lindatrole

Sorry for the loss of your mum Lots of Hugs dear.
God Bless Her.
Congrats about the Child, welcome the little one with big smile.