Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

IainHL

AlexLK wrote: »

Thank you for your post in regards to the phone call I received. Firstly, yes I am on a reduced payment plan. However, that only lasts for 6 months - they said it would go back to the previous payment plan then. Having read your post - is that legal?

I have already said that I wish to correspond by writing and not by telephone but it appears this one is ringing anyway.

Yes it is legal, as a reduced payment plan is entirely at their discretion. However OFT guidelines state that creditors are supposed to treat people in financial difficulties sympathetically.


When the initial 6 month period is nearing its end I would look to be negotiating a continuation at the same level of payment (that is if you haven't negotiated a F&F before then!).


As for them phoning you, well as I said, refuse to answer their security questions and state, politely but firmly, that you will only deal with this matter in writing. Hopefully the message will get through before too long.

AlexLK

Thank you for the advice.

That is what I was planning to do - try to renegotiate. Whilst I can see the two with collection agencies being paid off, I don't think the others will be, as we are trying to sell all the things we don't want before the things we do want now.

Will definitely give that a try if any try calling again.

Mara_uk7

I dont think they will negotiate until they are passed to a collection agency. But worth asking.
Bedtime methinks .... But first.... Move all the clocks back ! Ive been missing this hour since March !

AlexLK

Mara: I think this is the case too , oh well, I'll hopefully get money off the collection agency debts. The other two will just have to be paid in full.

I reckon an extra hour in bed will be welcome if the storm is as predicted. :eek: :rotfl:

chevalier

Well done on getting the party at your place. That is great. Keep on putting those boundaries in place, and I hope that your relationship with both sets of parents will improve.

Some great ideas with the party bags. I especially like the book idea. I did that one year for my younger DS. I later found out that for at least one participant that was the first book he had 'ever' been given:eek:.

Nice on on the extra work, and on the selling of the furniture.

sorry to hear that one bank isn't playing ball. It is your right to ask for all communication to be in writing. You could really freak them out and use your green ink:rotfl:.

Meant to say ref the music lessons, you are putting away something for tax aren't you.....
chev

Goldiegirl

Chev - I've spent my whole working life in the financial field, so you've asked the question that's been on my mind.

Alex, you ARE doing your book keeping, and keeping money by for tax and NI and producing annual accounts, aren't you? Please say yes!

AlexLK

chevalier wrote: »

Well done on getting the party at your place. That is great. Keep on putting those boundaries in place, and I hope that your relationship with both sets of parents will improve.

Some great ideas with the party bags. I especially like the book idea. I did that one year for my younger DS. I later found out that for at least one participant that was the first book he had 'ever' been given:eek:.

Nice on on the extra work, and on the selling of the furniture.

sorry to hear that one bank isn't playing ball. It is your right to ask for all communication to be in writing. You could really freak them out and use your green ink:rotfl:.

Meant to say ref the music lessons, you are putting away something for tax aren't you.....
chev

Fingers crossed the party will work out OK at my house. Parents did understand, thank goodness.

Currently thinking book, home made jigsaw puzzle and a bit of cake = party bag sorted!

:rotfl: I may just do that re. the bank.

Goldiegirl wrote: »

Chev - I've spent my whole working life in the financial field, so you've asked the question that's been on my mind.

Alex, you ARE doing your book keeping, and keeping money by for tax and NI and producing annual accounts, aren't you? Please say yes!

In regard to tax, for my other business my accountant sorts out all of that. So far as the music goes, I'm just keeping a record of when, who and how much. Don't really see why I need to do anymore?

So far as tax and NI goes, the other business will cover any additional contributions I have to make. My reasoning behind that one being that I pay myself so little from the business anyway. I will review how I go about finding the money for the tax on the music income if I begin to pay myself significantly more from the other business.

Not sure that makes much sense.

gallygirl

Does to me, which is slightly worrying :rotfl:. Basically you're proposing to rob Peter to pay Paul but as you owe both Peter and Paul I think that's ok .

Not sure THAT makes much sense .

Granariesgirl

AlexLK wrote: »

I'm positive there is. Usually, my mother has impeccable manners. However, that is dependent on whom she is speaking to.

My apologies for being brutal here: That's not impeccable manners then, is it? It's pure snobbery.
Good manners is polite or well-bred social behaviour. Being polite is having or showing behaviour that is respectful and considerate of other people. Snobbery is the character or quality of being a snob. A snob is a person with an exaggerated respect for high social position or wealth who seeks to associate with social superiors and looks down on those regarded as socially inferior. (OED)

I think that everyone is a snob at times. However if a person has good manners, those they regard as their social inferiors or superiors (rightly or wrongly) should never suspect - if they do, that person does NOT have good manners.
I got taught this at home - by both parents & grandparents - very firmly. AND at school! We had the example of the impeccable manners of the Royal Family drummed into us until we were heartily SICK of it (that was pre Fergie & co.:p) at ours!
Surely you got taught that very basic lesson at your public school, too?

Iwillsucceed wrote: »

Ha ha ha! that sounds more like manners in disguise..I would have thought she would have high regards for your wife and family.... I always thought manners were consistent and permanent.

I do understand when you said 'that's the way your mother is...fine...but the way she is could be hindering or affecting your relationship....

Couldn't agree more with you, there! But Alex has come on a lot since being "rehabilitated" on MSE so can maybe see that now!

AlexLK wrote: »

Unfortunately, the type of attitude that makes her a "rude" person today, made her a successful one during her working life.

Alex, I wonder if she succeeded more because of her drive, work ethic & ambition rather than her snobbery & outright rudeness to those considered her social inferiors... who knows if she would have been even more successful if she had taken the time to be polite not only to those she considered important or useful but also to the "little people" that worked for them? :cool:

I seem to remember you saying some pages back that your parents are growing more isolated by the year & that you have difficulty finding people who will come to their annual party... is this a consequence perhaps of their attitude towards others or have they been unlucky in that many of their friends died younger than expected?
If the former, their attitudes CAN change & the insecurity they feel about someone "discovering" their origins will go, leaving them happier people with a greater ability to find friends & enlarge their social circle. It will not be a walk in the park, though & you would have to lead by example!
I bet they are great people when relaxed & at ease...

Your parents really need to understand that true class is not a question of birth & possessions... I'm putting in a quote here as this lady said it much better than I ever could:

“Class never runs scared. It is sure-footed and confident.
It can handle anything that comes along. Class has a sense of humour.
It knows a good laugh is the best lubricant for oiling the machinery of human relations.

Class never makes excuses. It takes its lumps and learns from past mistakes.
Class knows that good manners are nothing more than a series of small, inconsequential sacrifices.

Class bespeaks an aristocracy that has nothing to do with ancestors or money.
Some wealthy “blue bloods” have no class, while individuals who are struggling to make ends meet are loaded with it.

Class is real. It can’t be faked.

Class never tried to build itself by tearing others down.
Class is already up and need not strive to look better by making others look worse.

Class can “walk with kings and keep it’s virtue and talk with crowds and keep the common touch.” Everyone is comfortable with the person who has class because that person is comfortable with himself.

If you have class, you’ve got it made.
If you don’t have class, no matter what else you have, it doesn’t make any difference.”
― Ann Landers

These are ideals I try to live up to but I'm not sure I achieve more than occasionally.
And I bet there are a load more people on MSE with class who are poor or (shock, horror milady!) low born than rich or aristocratic...

Rosepetal1701

Hey there - just made the connection :rotfl:I've been reading through the posts and seems to me that when you decide to do something (eg the party) you plan it, then follow through! That shows determination - remember that when dealing with the bank!