Moving (buying house) elderly relatives - advice appreciated

BitterAndTwisted

For the time being I would leave them to find their own solution. Given time, they might come round to the necessity of either marketing the property while they are in it or moving into rented until they have the funds required to buy, if buying is the most sensible option.

If they are not involved in the decision-making they might not come round to any sensible solution until you are prepared to withdraw what help you currently are offering.

holly_hobby

Getting back to their house - which I assume is unencumbered (mge free).

Releasing equity - Standard Residential Mge

In principle this could be done under a residential mge, BUT they would need sufficient income to support the borrowings, and if they are diagnosed mental health or cognative imparement issues, this will complicate matters regarding their entering into a contractual agreement.

To which given their mental health issues, effecting a Lasting Power of Attorney via the COP if necessary (with 1 for financial/property matters and 1 for health/welfare care) will be more beneficial and relevant than a simple Power of Attorney.

Lifetime mortgage

This is determined not by income, but by age and property value, with repayment of the capital sum plus loaded interest circa 5/6%, designed to be upon entry into long term care or death.

Accordingly, and notwithstanding the mental assessment issue, this is not recommended for short term lending, due to the hefty redemption penalties - and may not release what they need in any event ..

As suggested above, SS should be assisting in locating even temp accomodation for them, and I would press them on this.

Link for LPA guidance - https://www.gov.uk/power-of-attorney

Hope this helps and wish you well at what must be an immensly trying and stressful time for you.

Holly x

pmlindyloo

QUOTE

They want everything to stay exactly as it is now - the two of them living alone with visits from family. They don't realise that this is no longer viable, and due to mental health issues can't reason.

Exactly why I asked the question!

Are you sure that they will move? You could spend hours researching and they would just refuse.

If this is the case then you will have to let them get to the stage where they realise they cannot cope. Whatever you do, don't make yourself ill by caring for them (been there and got the T shirt)

If you give me your search area I could do a bit of investigating.

If you find somewhere suitable give them the brochures and then leave them to it - with a bit of luck they will discuss it between themselves. My experience has taught me that the elderly can dig their heels in and may not respond to 'nagging' about what they should or shouldn't do.

Don't know your relatives so this may not apply!

xylophone

If you find somewhere suitable give them the brochures and then leave them to it - with a bit of luck they will discuss it between themselves. My experience has taught me that the elderly can dig their heels in and may not respond to 'nagging' about what they should or shouldn't do.

From my experience this is just exactly the case and those concerned were fully compos mentis, just physically very frail.

carefullycautious

What about sheltered housing through a housing association. They always have flat or sometimes bungalows for sale

Try Anchor.org they have properties and are non profit making

They may allow them to rent until propery is sold worth ringing and asking if they have properties near you

witchy1066

its a hard one , with lots of grey areas , with many legal, not to mention moral issues to consider , but I think you already know that so will hopefully give you a couple of suggestions that might help.

the council/HA will be reluctant to rehouse while they own a property but you might be able to get them into some kind of respite for a few weeks once the property has sold, and a new property bought , giving family time to get the new house ready for them,


you might also be able to get more help for them, while keeping them in their own home , perhaps this would be something worth looking into given the mental frailty of both relatives,
obviously this would depend on the Dr's and SS assessments

MCLF

kelpie35 wrote: »

Are social services involved with them just now?

If they are then I would suggest that you request their help in relocating them to your area by contacting SS in your area.

If not could you contact your local SS and ask for help with trying to relocate them.

I wish you all the best in the future.

Social Services have been involved in the past. Great idea about contacting our local SS - thanks.

MCLF

richardw wrote: »

OK.

How quickly do you think their current property would sell?

Don't forget the 'not moving before christmas' mindset can happen to some people as soon as the x facta is back on the TV.

I really don't know. The property itself is well-maintained and there's no known problems with it or the neighbourhood.

MCLF

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

For the time being I would leave them to find their own solution. Given time, they might come round to the necessity of either marketing the property while they are in it or moving into rented until they have the funds required to buy, if buying is the most sensible option.

If they are not involved in the decision-making they might not come round to any sensible solution until you are prepared to withdraw what help you currently are offering.

Unfortunately this wouldn't work. I don't want to go into all the health issues and the reasons why, but they can't see that they aren't coping and need support.

pmlindyloo wrote: »

QUOTE

They want everything to stay exactly as it is now - the two of them living alone with visits from family. They don't realise that this is no longer viable, and due to mental health issues can't reason.

Exactly why I asked the question!

Are you sure that they will move? You could spend hours researching and they would just refuse.

If this is the case then you will have to let them get to the stage where they realise they cannot cope. Whatever you do, don't make yourself ill by caring for them (been there and got the T shirt)

If you give me your search area I could do a bit of investigating.

If you find somewhere suitable give them the brochures and then leave them to it - with a bit of luck they will discuss it between themselves. My experience has taught me that the elderly can dig their heels in and may not respond to 'nagging' about what they should or shouldn't do.

Don't know your relatives so this may not apply!

We've been trying to reason with them to move for a long time. When it was obvious that this wasn't going to work we backed off for exactly the reasons you've mentioned.

It's a very complicated situation, involving lifelong MH issues, new MH issues and physical health problems. We've given very careful thought to this, consulted professionals, considered alternatives, and tried different approaches.

flora48

Is their property suitable for renting, perhaps you could rent that out to pay for the rent on a new, more suitable place.