CAMHS - Experiences?

scorpio_biker

Hi,

I wondered if you good people could give me any experience of CAMHS, good or bad?

My partner has custody of his daughter, she wanted to live with him. We don't live together. His daughter is 14. She is a fussy eater and will never make a decision on food, although in the right mood she can eat for England.

She suffers from depression (his divorce was terrible) and some bullying, so got referred to CAMHS. However it appears that they have decided that OH is not feeding her properly and she should live with her mother. Indeed at the first appointment they made him cry. At the second appointment her mother was allowed in for the whole appointment and apparently "they offered to support her if she took OH back to court for custody".

This all sounds very one sided to me, OH hasn't been offered any support in bringing up his daughter, or any support in sorting out her eating. They haven't listened to the daughter either, she wants to remain at her fathers.

So I just wondered whether other people had had any similar problems with CAMHS? And any advice on where we go from here would be appreciated.

Thanks in advance.

pigpen

Not had similar experience with them but I found them useless, unsupportive and uninterested in the children whose needs were less than suicidal.. by their own admission they are 'too busy' to see any other children regardless of their needs.

I wouldn't accept a referral to them again.

I'd stop taking her, they are leading her and causing her more distress. I would write to the supervisors of the person she is seeing and explain what has happened and that they are causing the girl more issues and upsetting the whole family. They are making unfounded allegations of neglect etc.

moomoomama27

Absolutely horrendous! As pp said unless your child is suicidal then they just don't care! They are wishy washy, patronising and useless! Myself and a few other parents have found this!

Best bet s to go to your SD teacher with your husband, they can do a straight referral to the YMCA. I found their counselling for teens wonderful, and they can do the counselling at school discreetly, they can also get other agencies involved of they think it would help? Also Barnados offer great support for children and more importantly parents in helping to deal with problem teens.


Best of luck!

Gigglepig

OP is there more to this story? is the girl underweight, possibly suffering from an eating disorder, or showing up at school with inappropriate lunches?

You say your partner has not been offered any support. has he been battling hard to get support in the first place? as a parent he would be expected to proactively sort out any issues and getting her the help she needs on his own initiative.

Maysie

Well i have found the reports with wrong names on, talking about another child, patronising, dunno how i am going to get son to next appt he hates the place as they don't' listen. Was told unless he has medication there is no point coming back psychologist has cancelled appts on the day or short notice. Made appts in the sch holidays so i cannot get support from the school sen who is willing to come to appts. I have felt bullied into medication when i know it did no good in our case. I do not have a high opinion of them.

also mentioned son had mention suicide and how he would do it and he brushed it aside and just started going on about this stupid medication.

Frith

CAMHS were one of the many different teams involved in diagnosing my son with Aspergers and they were definitely the weakest link. Eventually, they said he was "too complex" for them (he was 7 at the time!) and got in a psychiatrist for me from elsewhere and she diagnosed him in half an hour.

As others have found, they seemed completely overstretched. For 2 appointments we had a psych nurse who told my son to stop being silly when he wouldn't speak to him (son has selective mutism.....)

They also compiled reports with the wrong dates and mistakes on and consistently spelled my son's name wrong.

exarmydreamer

I refused to take my children to CAHMs and when I needed a second opinion on my third son's autism (yes, they all have ASD,ADHD, Dyslexia etc), I asked for a referral to another area for a one off appointment - never to be repeated. I could write forever of the problems blow by blow but I would be here for a very long time. We live in South Wales, might give some a clue as to which incompetent CAMH's I am writing about.:mad:

If you can get an appointment through the Children's Centre pedeatrician for a home visit by a dietician, this would be useful, my son stopped eating school dinners in his special school but it was down to a change in menu to one which mirrored the main stream school, ie curry with sauce (my children don't like wet food, she raised concerns with the council - sorted).

The dietician was useful but it was not rocket science, full fat milk, shakes, butter in mash really all the things I already do!, but I went along with it and they left me to it and two years on my 16 yr old still stuffs his face and looks as skinny as a rake but he is healthy.

My children are all very slight, due to their fathers build and the medication they take. They are also fussy due to the autism i.e texture. I have found CAHM's useless and have spoken to many parents who have had the same problem. I have also forewarned my sister who's son has now been referred for ASD etc, on how useless they are and how horrible they make you feel.

scorpio_biker

Thanks to all of you who replied, it's very helpful.

The daughter is underweight, but does have a slight build like her father. He tries to get what help he can, but is disabled and struggles to deal with phone calls and the like. I try to help him where I can, and support the daughter, but as I said we don't live together and I'm 60 miles away, which makes it tricky.

We are genuinely trying to help her but CAMHS seems to making the situation worse. I will tell him about your comments and we'll see if we can pursue additional help elsewhere.

Thanks again.

exarmydreamer

Just to let you know you don't have to see them, it will not be held against you, if you ask to see a children's doctor for a referral to a dietition.

They can be very interferring and misinformed and it is quite frightening that they should suggest supporting his ex to gain custody through court. My alarm bells are ringing already.

Vicky123

I would tread carefully with this, irrespective of whether CAMHS is any good or not, could it be possible the daughter herself asked to live with mum. At 14yrs she might tell something more easily to the Psche than parents, it sounds like something has gone down you may not be fully aware of. They generally do concern themselves with childs need and not parents. I found them to be a mixed bag, my son seen a couple of different people there and although didn't do much for his problem directly they did go out of their way to find resources we wouldn't otherwise have known of.
Sometimes luck of the draw in who you get I think.

Judy_Judy

I have to go against the grain here, I found CAMHS child focussed, child centred and fabulous. Also had a suicidal child with OCD and ASD. They were amazing.

If a 14 year old child wants to live with their mother or their father this is normally where the specialists will recommend they live. If they are forced to live with a parent they don't want to be with, against their wishes, they will run away anyway. It's not good for the child to be on the streets. It's different if they are younger but at 14 it's normally ordered to be with the parent they want to be with.