Quite important mortgage advice, relationship break up!

BERFFRO

Firstly sorry for posting here i need a fairly quick answer.

Its a long story so ill break it up into bulletpoints:

• background

Friend female, has been suffering from extreme depression for the last 12 months

Partner has left her with the 3 children and hardly see's the kids, so with the summer holidays the stress get a bit too much. In the last month she has tried to take her own life twice and im really worried that this might be the final push for her.

There's history of mental and physical abuse in the relationship, i.e controlling more than anything else.

She works but is on half pay around £400 a month


Right, heres the dilemma:
This morning she has received a solicitors letter stating that she must give half the mortgage payment to him(fair enough when she can) and that he wants a £20,000 lump sum or the house is up for sale, she's in no position to pay this.

Now, has anyone gone through a break up as she's led to believe that he's got to pay the mortgage until the youngest is 16 if theirs any truth in this, or how what did you do if you were in a similar position?

Any other advice would be greatly received as im at the end of my tether!

Thanks

kingstreet

Independent legal advice is the only answer to this issue.

TrickyDicky101

Anyone can go along to a solicitor's office and get them to draft up a letter stating whatever they want (as long as not blatantly illegal) for a fee. It carries no more weight than a post it note with mad scribblings on it.

Has your friend taken legal advice? That is the thing to do. Depending on the level of abuse other legal avenues (such as the police) could also be open to her. Arranging an appointment with CAB could point her in the right direction.

BERFFRO

Numerous agencies are involved in the whole situation, which seems to get worse as each day goes along!

Thrugelmir

Is friend married?

BERFFRO

no, friend isn't married, but they have been living together for the last 11 years.

Thrugelmir

BERFFRO wrote: »

Now, has anyone gone through a break up as she's led to believe that he's got to pay the mortgage until the youngest is 16 if theirs any truth in this, or how what did you do if you were in a similar position?

Please advise her to take proper legal advice.

In short. The other party is not liable for the mortgage. Only for maintenance for the children. She should be able to remain in the property until all the children have left full time education. After which the other party is entitled t their share of the equity (however that's been agreed previously to be divided).

In any court proceedings. The judge first and foremost will protect the welfare and interests of the children. Over and above that of the respective parties.

If she cannot afford the mortgage, even taking the maintenance into account, then that is another matter entirely. Will require an alternative plan.

TrickyDicky101

Thrugelmir wrote: »

In short. The other party is not liable for the mortgage.

...After which the other party is entitled t their share of the equity (however that's been agreed previously to be divided).

If the mortgage is joint & several (ie in both their names) then yes he most certainly is liable for the mortgage! He wouldn't escape liability for the mortgage while retaining an interest in the equity. You know better than that!

holly_hobby

The first thing you friend needs to do is speak to a family law solicitor, regarding what financial assistance he will be reqd to make provision for, which may well include the mge.

Importantly, your friend should know that if the house is in joint names, he can not simply sell or insist the property is sold, without her permission - if she refuses the only way he can force the sale is through the courts, and given its also the abode of his issue, this may not be as straightforward as he thinks (which may upon the courts financial assessment and other details, actually involve his continued servicing of the debt, given his children, if still dependant, reside there).

I won't comment on the mental health issues (and assume she has support from family and social svcs, mental health support groups), if her attempts are solely in connection with the house sale and dispair, tell her she's a very long way from being ousted by this louse.

Monday is the day for her to take the control away from him, taking the reigns herself and seeking legal advice and formal provision for their children - but he certainly does NOT hold all the aces here ... in fact its rather the opposite.

Hope this helps ... I wish her well and a swift return to wellness

Holly xxx

property.advert

If he's done a bunk and she's gone do-lally then social services should whip the kids into care ASAP before she flips completely and kills them before trying again to top herself. Plenty of nutters like this in the news lately. If social services don't, then they are culpable for any harm which comes to the children.

House and all that is a long way secondary to protecting the kids from parents who can't or don't want to shoulder their responsibility.

BERFFRO

property.advert wrote: »

If he's done a bunk and she's gone do-lally then social services should whip the kids into care ASAP before she flips completely and kills them before trying again to top herself. Plenty of nutters like this in the news lately. If social services don't, then they are culpable for any harm which comes to the children.

House and all that is a long way secondary to protecting the kids from parents who can't or don't want to shoulder their responsibility.

A bit more to the story than that! I can see your point but no harm will ever come to the kids.