New Member Introduction

FlubM

Well, here I am: about to be made redundant. I have worked since I was thirteen (not full time at that age - I am about to turn fifty but don't actually date back to the Victorian age!) with only a two month gap to travel and two four month-long maternity leaves.

Thanks to my husband, we have been fairly sensible with money so our mortgage is paid off and we have some savings. However, even though I am completely burned out and in despearate need of a good rest, I am feeling extremely guilty and selfish for thinking about taking a break from work for a few months: I was planning to start saving for the children's future.

On the other hand although we have not been extravagant (no changing cars every two years, no loans for home improvements, no exotic holidays), there is no doubt that with two (more than) full time jobs and two children with many interests, we have often sacrificed money for time. We don't shop around for much, we eat more convenience food that we should: basically, we are financially sloppy.

I am also acutely aware that, while our house is structurally sound it has degenerated into a cluttered and neglected tip and that this upsets at least one of our children who would dearly love to have a tidy house like those of his friends.

So, methinks that a plan would be to see whether, by being more careful with money, I can eek out the two months' redundancy money and take a break from work until the new year without causing us too much financial hardship.

I am on my first day of gardening leave and plan to reflect at the end of the day to see what I can learn from it. All tips and advice will be gratefully received. I am a little worried that, even in my so-called money saving mode, I won't be sufficiently old-school for any die-hards on here: I don't intend to be foraging for food, knitting my own furniture, or crafting cars from junk scavenged from skips. What I do want is to buy myself enough time to recuperate; sort out the house; catch up with family and friends; rediscover some of my interests and hobbies; and generally feel like a human being and not a worn out drudge! This is surely not too much to ask.

CH27

Welcome to Old Style

Meal planning is a big help in saving mone as it stops me buying stuff I don't need.

Tidy as you go along ie
never go upstairs empty handed
wipe the kitchen surfaces when waiting for the kettle to boil.

[Deleted User]

Hello FLUBM welcome to the OS world, come over to the OS Doorstep/Tougher thread you'll be very welcome and our little family are so inventive and supportive there will be oodles of ideas for you if you ask the questions. What will be just as nice though will be having a new friend to chat to, come on in, the water's find, Cheers Lyn x.

EstherH

Hi FLUBM: Welcome. I love the old style boards especially the tougher thread. I lurk more than contribute and have learnt loads of useful tips over time. So.... as has already been said meal plan. If you have plenty in at the moment, see what you can make out of your store cupboard instead of just going shopping and buying loads that you don't need. What I find really useful is to put money I have saved into a jar, it's amazing how quickly it mounts up. Any money saved by using a voucher, switching to a lower brand, making a meal from scratch instead of take away or ready meal. Stick it in a jar and then when you have a certain amount bank it or use it for a treat, whatever you want. It will help you to see the savings.

I also find the second purse challenge over on the food shopping and grocery board really good. It takes some getting your head around and isnt for everyone but it's worth a look.

Batch cooking is good and now that you have time on your hands it's an ideal time to start. One meal for now and more to freeze as a homemade ready meal. So much healthier and cheaper than shop bought.
HTH. Esther x

Oh, and old style doesn't have rules about how much you have to do to be old style. It's what suits you and your family. I don't sew, knit, do craft stuff or a lot of what some of the others are able to do. But I enjoy the challenge of getting my food bill lower by careful managing and cooking from scratch. E x

Seakay

I'm sure you'll find plenty of tips to help you on here - the only rules are, as with the rest of the site, those of politeness and not making assumptions about other members. Like if there are "die hards" what they do and what they think.
Use the green button towards the top of the page to search for posts or threads about subjects you are interested in.

Butterfly_Brain

Welcome to OS :hello: The best advice that I can give is.... Baby steps.
If you try to do everything at once it will be too daunting and you will give up on the whole idea.
Decide what you want to do first; if it is to declutter the house, start in one room and work from there, even if it takes two, three or four days to do that room or just giving it half an hour, an hour or a couple of hours per day. It has taken me 5 days to do my teeny tiny kitchen, a cupboard a day is all I did and now I am really pleased with the results.
Have a big box to put stuff in that you don't want and either do a car boot/garage sale or give it to charity.
If the children would love a tidy house why have they not helped you to get it clean and tidy? You should not be expected to do it all or you will end up more exhausted than you were at work.

Try shopping in Aldi and see if you like it, it has saved us a lot of money over the years and the quality is really good.

Whatever you decide it is your choice and I wish you well x

FlubM

Thank you all for the welcome. I will definitely check out the other threads you mention later today when all the normal Saturday running around is done.

Butterfly Brain, you make a good point about getting the children to help out and I think what they do is reasonable for their age (9 and 11). The older one has always loved a job to do, is vety independent and loves to organise things. She works hard in the garden with her Dad, tidies her room (albeit with a little help once she starts to flag), bakes for us, cooks tea occasionally, and keeps all the school admin organised for herself and her brother.

The younger one is a dfferent character altogether and has a tendency to start hepling and wander off after 10 minutes to play! He is just starting to improve a little and will work hard with us to tidy his room as long as one of us is there to keep him focussed. Generally speaking, he has grown up hugely in the last few months so I have hope of better things to come especially as he does love a tidy house.

I have to be honest though and say that our current state is daunting for grown adults so I can understand the children feeling that anything they can do will be pretty futile. One of the upsides of being at home for a while will be the children being able to come home straight from school rather than going to after school club until 6.00pm so I will try to use some of the additonal time to get them to sort through their things for stuff we can get rid of! It will take time but I am sure we will get there eventually: I will try to remember your advice not to try to take on too much all at once.

Honey_Bear

If the idea of tackling the house seems daunting, may I suggest the Flylady thread? I've been using it for a year and this house is now manageable, and to be honest, it had become a bit of a nightmare. I'm constantly surprised at how helpful some of the random suggestions are, and everyone is totally supportive. My personal advice would be to be satisfied and happy with any progress you make - baby steps, especially if you're feeling burnt out.

cyclingyorkie

welcome to Old Style. Everyone is very welcome here - we don't criticise we try to help, so if you need help ask away!

Your desires seem very reasonable to me! Feel free to drop in to the Flylady thread - it's full of people trying to sort themselves out (looks at ceiling and whistles...)

FlubM

Oh dear, 4 days in to my plan to take a break following redundancy and I am just beginning to really appreciate what a culture shock this is going to be!

I have managed nothing on the money saving front at all. In fact, I was persuaded by DH that we should take out the most expensive joint membership at our local (expensive) gym. The rationale: part of the reason to take a break is to enable us to improve our health and well-being. This is true but.......:undecided

On the old-style front, I seem to be faring little better. Yesterday I forgot to give the children any lunch and on Saturday forgot half the things we needed at the supermarket.

De-cluttering is a little better. Babies must be like buses in our family: having waited nearly 10 years for cousins for my two, we are now expecting two and are finally getting rid of all the old baby and toddler stuff. In two weeks time we are hiring a van and DH will deliver it all (plus some furniture) the length and breadth of the country. Helped by the children, he ventured into the (double) garage yesterday so everything is now sorted (including a load of stuff for the tip:T. The volume of cothes we had stashed away in the loft has to be seen to be believed so I am very busy sorting it, freshening it up with a quick wash, drying and airing it. I am seriously considering auditioning for panto this year as I should have a good chance of getting cast as Widow Twanky! Clearly the water & electiricity bills will be horrendous so another fail there on the money-saving front. However, part of the reason for the break is also to sort the house out and this will be a huge help in the long run, (although for now the family has run out of clean clothes as the washing machine is constantly full of baby stuff - so not excatly a domestic goddess yet, then!).

On the plus side, although ridiculously tired just from trotting up and downstairs and in and out of the garden with laundry (I am realising just how unfit I am), I notice that a number of niggly aches and pains have already gone away:T

So, overall I think 0/10 for domestic-goddessing, 0/10 for money saving, 7/10 for decluttering. I can already feel through the ether the heady mix of tutting, sympathy and encouragement from those who are older hands at this: please feel free to pass commenet (judgement even!) as I clearly need all the help I can get with this radical change in life-style.

Pink.

Hi FlubM,

I have added your update to your existing thread to keep all the information in one place.

Pink