ignore

carl6468

should have know better. I posted out of genuine concern for my mum, thanks for the genuine words of help but I really don't need to deal with the usual troll response about losing 'my inheritance'. it's not going to me anyway & I couldn't give a toss about the money, just my mum being taken from an idiot in a completely 1 sided non- existant relationship.

InsideInsurance

How old is he approx? How much younger roughly than your mum?

When you say she has "feelings" for him do you mean romantic? Parental?

Do you have any other concerns about your mothers mental health?

Unless she has mental health issues then there is little you can do other than raise your concerns and let her decide on how she wants to spend her twilight years.

carl6468

not relevant any more

sukysue

If she is happy then leave her alone, none of your business really is it op?

spacey2012

Post changed -

InsideInsurance

carl6468 wrote: »

so sit back & do nothing even though i'm worried sick?

What are you actually worried about?

Your mum could simply be a little lonely, enjoys the attention of a man half her age and possibly gets a bit of nooky out of it. He does some odd jobs/ "man stuff" around the house and she isnt bothered about getting rent out of him.

Obviously if she is on the breadline and skipping meals so she can lend him money then things would be slightly different but that would make me start to question her mental health.

Unless she is senile then its her life, her money and her choice. You could suggest alternative options, perhaps you move in with her? Go into an old folks home? But if she likes her space, her independence, and her lodger then its her choice.

itsanne

Is there anyone else in the family you can talk to?

Might it be worth a chat with the police? If she's of sound mind it's really her own choice, but it could be that he's known to them, possibly done the same before. Age UK sounds a good idea.

Good luck.

Janey3

If it were my mum, I would pay some unannounced visits now and again while he is there and quietly assess the situation and the guy over a period of time. This will let him know that there is somebody there for your mum if he is up to no good.

SuzieSue

carl6468 wrote: »

should have know better. I posted out of genuine concern for my mum, thanks for the genuine words of help but I really don't need to deal with the usual troll response about losing 'my inheritance'. it's not going to me anyway & I couldn't give a toss about the money, just my mum being taken from an idiot in a completely 1 sided non- existant relationship.

Don't worry about it. It's the same whenever anyone posts about a genuine concern about an elderly parent. As this is a money saving site, a lot of the people here are obsessed with money and just because all they care about is their inheritance, they think that everyone else is like them. It also makes them feel somehow superior in their sad little lives.

I'm sure your concern was genuine although you deleted your posts before I read them. The trolls on here actually accused someone who had cancer of being motivated by money a little while ago so there is no limit to how low they will stoop.

fireyfirenze

to be fair only one post said about the will, most of them were quite helpful. I saw your original post and I would be slightly concerned too but don't really have any advice to give :-/ I would meet him though, at least you can put a face to the name then and try and suss him out a bit.

SuzieSue

fireyfirenze wrote: »

to be fair only one post said about the will, most of them were quite helpful.

Yes, but it only takes one idiot to upset some people as unfortunately some people forget that they should just ignore idiots.

The problem is that most decent people would just assume that the son was just being caring, but people who are obsessed with their own inheritance automatically assume that he is motivated by money so I suppose they can't help themselves. The OP should just feel sorry for them.