soo annoyed! ggrrr.

bexiboo92

This sounds all too familiar to my life OP!

[Deleted User]

I have been where you are.., trying my hardest to control the finances and then having my hard work scuppered by something my (now) ex did.., often without even consulting me.

Yes you read it right, he's now my ex lol. But your story may not be the same. In fact from your post I am pretty sure its not (i.e. this is not a repeated happening, you may have been left to sort the finances out on your own which is not pleasant but it could be worse).

Acknowledge that its not the money that's the problem, its the fact that your feelings have been ignored. That's what hurts. And your hard work. Then you two might be able to have a discussion about this and clear up some of the hurt and worry.

To be honest, if its just this £500.., while its a large sum, at worst I would imagine he's likely to make a small loss. If he makes a profit, then financially u'll be ok. But you both need to address the hurt feelings aspect of this.

Best of luck.

FBaby

It would depend on the reason why you suffered from debts before. If it was because of poor investment judgments on his part before, then I think you would have a very good reason to be cross. If however the debts had nothing to do with it, he is skilled in what he intends on doing and had previously been able to make a profit from similar practices, then I would think you are being unfair.

Either way, I would tell him that whatever profit he makes should not be spent but saved to use to do the same in the future to avoid having to ask for a cash advance in the future.

lostinrates

meritaten wrote: »

have you thought that he may be right? and you could turn a good profit? see it through and if he makes a loss then, and only then, point out that it was a 'bad buy'. have some faith in him hun - you say that its connected to his latest hobby - he may well know that this item is worth thousands rather than hundreds.
oh and you say its on HIS credit card - if he makes a profit does he get to keep it?

He may well be right, but it stilL could have been something they discussed on, and agreed how to finance before....by saving and paying for in savings, or taking on less debt.

maman

I was interested in the comment that 'he earns the money but the OP controls all the finances' (paraphrase). Maybe he's just fed up with earning the money and not being able to spend it on any fun things. I know this is presented as a potential money making activity but it's also the guy's hobby. Maybe he's fed up with just slogging away and being controlled.

Interested to hear the outcome.

owen_money

That's men for you, we just don't think when there is a chance of a new toy. It took me a while to realise when my wife said 'do what the f**k you like', she didn't really mean it

pukkamum

My dh is very like this, he wants a new gaming pc and his answer, just put it on the credit card, we don't owe anything on it.
Errrr hello, the only reason we don't owe anything is because we worked hard to clear it, and I'm not willing to rack up debt again so he can have better graphics in the games he plays too often anyway.
Men are such children sometimes!

Takeaway_Addict

pukkamum wrote: »

My dh is very like this, he wants a new gaming pc and his answer, just put it on the credit card, we don't owe anything on it.
Errrr hello, the only reason we don't owe anything is because we worked hard to clear it, and I'm not willing to rack up debt again so he can have better graphics in the games he plays too often anyway.
Men are such children sometimes!

And women aren't?

pollypenny

I'm with the OP. it's a venture, but as they've worked hard to get out if debt, a large cash advance like this should have been with agreement of both.

It sounds as if the clearing of the debt is recent, so wonder the OP is nervous about a risk.

aileth

Just_a_Girl wrote: »

I'm sorry but I don't buy the "it's his credit card" - they are married, a family, finances are shared. If both individuals can't agree on a big spend like this, especially when they are only just out of debt, then it shouldn't be spent, regardless of whose name is on the card!

Totally agree with this. The more debt my husband has, the more it affects me. If husband racks up loads of debt and maybe is so daft he can't even cover his share of bills, then it comes out of my pocket.

I'd leave him to his devices this time, see how it goes. If it's a total failure, bloody let him know so and don't be fobbed off with, "Oh that was a trial run, I can do it this time with another £500." Good luck OP.