Aunt's Divorce

GoldenShadow

Just wondered if anyone had any advice which I could pass on to my aunt.

She has been married to her OH for (I think) over 20 years. They have two (grown up but still living in the family home) children. The property aunt and uncle own is worth a few hundred K and they have no mortgage (aunt inherited some from friend and paid it off).

Divorce is definitely happening. Aunt was a stay at home mum for quite a while and having gone back to work doesn't earn loads, only about 12K a year. Uncle has been the breadwinner and earns significantly more, 50K + I believe. Living in the south its more expensive to live than in other parts of the country. For a 'nice' 1 bed flat its £650 per month here, I daresay you can find cheaper but the cheaper ones I've seen are rougher areas.

Kids blame Mum and things aren't great on that front. Family member was going to let aunt live in one of his houses but Uncle has said he can't afford rent (£400 per month) and with aunt's low earnings she's a bit trapped. She is meant to be moving in there tomorrow but who knows how long she can be there for.

Easy option is get the house sold, but uncle and children do not want this so I imagine it would be mighty difficult/take a long time. Aunt's parent's house is to be sold in near future where approximately 40K should come her way but its not enough to get a mortgage I doubt. And its still not properly on the market..! Plus perhaps that will need to be split with uncle, I don't know...

Am I right to assume if aunt is not living in jointly owned home, uncle is liable for rent? Any guidelines as to how much? He was prepared to pay £100 per week but now he says only £50. Any general advice for my aunt, too?

whitewing

See a solicitor and get it all sorted out properly because it sounds quite complicated. What seems fair often isn't the way the law sees it.

Treevo

Why in earth would he have to pay her rent? If she can only afford to live in a house share then that's where she's going to have to live. She could always stay in the family home until the divorce is finalised.

paulineb_2

Yes, see a lawyer, I also would agree, do not move out unless she gets legal advice unless things are really bad

And tbh, we can all be in situations where we dont earn much and have to pay rent. My rent is just over half of your aunts, but I live in an area thats very hard to let and the rent is cheaper and sometimes you need to bite the bullet and get a roof over your head first and worry about the rest later

And yes, a flatshare may be the only solution for now if she needs to watch every penny

paulineb_2

And if shes entitled to half the value of the flat, why on earth shouldnt it be sold at a future date, she shouldnt be bullied by her kids into not getting what shes due from the sale.

MrsAnnie

Agreed.

She needs to stay put and not feel forced into anything. All assets of her and uncle will be classed as matrimonial (spl?) assets. Starting negotiating split is 50/50.

Uncle just can not dictate how much he is willing to give her per week.

She needs to seek legal advice sooner , rather than later, to understand her rights, and give her direction.

System

She needs to get legal advice asap. Although she has not been out to work, she has put toward the mortgage with her inheritance and she has enabled her husband to earn his high salary by staying home for 20-odd years and looking after him and the kids. These things would count in her favour, if she gets a good solicitor.

GoldenShadow

Thanks for all the replies. No hope of getting her to stay put I don't think

I feel really bad for my uncle, no one has done anything wrong aunt is just unhappy and wants out. This of course causes things to go sour now regarding finances.

Aunt is very hurt by the kid's responses (they knew something was up but not really what until a couple of weeks ago) and instead of waiting it out she's just desperate to go. I am concerned that she doesn't quite know how expensive everything is if she has to pay for everything on just her income.

Will encourage her to see a solicitor ASAP regardless. With the value of the house both aunt and uncle should be able to buy something relatively nice (and big enough if the grown up kids stay). Its just the long drawn out process it may be. I know uncle really doesn't want to sell the house and for some reason I think my aunt just got it into her head that he would pay for her to live somewhere else..!

ETA: I think aunt has worked for some years now, but its low paid and was just something extra to put in the pot/for her to do with the kids being grown up. Uncle paid mortgage when the kids were young but as mentioned my aunt paid off a chunk of the mortgage with inheritance from friends. Its probably more equal than I've made it sound, to be honest!

Obviously an unpleasant situation anyway but seems like aunt is shooting herself in the foot by moving out so quick, increasing the amount of time she has rent to pay etc.

MrsAnnie

Granted that she is the one who has made the choice to split, however regardless of the reasons for divorce, division of all assets, savings, pensions etc will most likely be equally split by the courts.

Your Aunt should not forego her rightful share, in a hurry to get out of the marriage. She needs to know her legal standpoint.

maman

It's not essential that home is sold. If uncle and grown children want to stay put it maybe that uncle (with his good salary and perhaps contributions from adult children) could buy out aunt's share. That would give her a lump sum to do with as she chooses. What her share is must be decided legally but I'd imagine if after long marriage it might be 50%.

It's possible that if her next 'inheritance' comes along after all this stuff is over that it may be hers and hers alone. Hard to tell on the timing.

Legal advice needed definitely.