Cyber bullying

custardcream1000

BlueBella wrote: »

No wonder there is a rise in eating disorders among the young! It said on the news a few days ago that the bullies who caused that young girl's suicide will be traced - I hope they are and are given the shock of their lives!

The topic was being discussed on This Morning last week too. This woman said that she had spoken to teenagers who had been involved in such cyber bullying and they described it as like being in an armed ring surrounding a victim. If everyone in the ring shoots together then no one knows whose bullet killed the victim so no one will need to live with the guilt of knowing they had killed the victim! So in other words - if loads of cyber bullies are posting nasty comments aimed at one poor victim, and then the victim commits suicide, then none of the bullies will ever know if it was their comment that finally pushed the victim over the edge! Very sad and in fact very frightening! If young kids can think along those lines at such a young age, just what will they be capable of when they are adults!

It sounds like the bystander effect; the greater amount of people involved, the more the sense of responsibilty diminishes.

jaibaby

BlueBella wrote: »

What scares me is what the bullies who managed to push that girl into hanging herself will grow up to be. If they are 'monsters' now - what will they be like as adults? More likely abusers or serial killers

Woah! You said yourself you were bullied. I was bullied as a child but the people that did that to me actually apologised when we grew up - none of them are abusers or serial killers!

The problem here is the amount of kids with easy access to the internet, parents not "moderating" what their children do online and the "Shield" of the computer screen - many kids think they can hide behind it - as many trolls do on forums such as this.

From bullying in the playground to bullying online - it's wrong, no matter where it is done. Bullying needs to be stopped, why does it take such an incident (RIP to the poor girl involved) for everyone to kick up a fuss? I bet thousands of kids are called names online everyday.

I sat and watched a video of a young girl a while ago. Made my two daughters (aged 12 & 9) sit and watch it with me (both have been bullied in school too.) - the video was a simple one, of her holding up placards describing what had happened to her. Half way through the video I was sobbing like a baby! The girls gave me their word that they would always tell me if they were ever bullied and never be scared to tell me anything.

At the end of the video it said the young girl had killed herself as she couldn't cope anymore. Why do we live in such a world where these bullies can win? The video is so powerful at the same time as being devastating.


Edit: if you want to watch the video, her name is Amanda Todd, (RIP beautiful girl), you've probably already seen or heard about it.

CyberStein

As a younger person who has been a victim to such things, I'd like to have my say and state that I do not think that stricter controls are needed from the government nor websites/online communities. Most sites give you more than enough controls with block/mute buttons, the ability to hide things from the prying public eyes and the ability to choose who you add into your personal space.

Without coming off as too personal, a lot of people who say that their kids need more protection on the internet in my opinion are lazy parents. I've seen it time and time again when things go wrong. You have many tools available to monitor and limit your children's activities on the internet and if you believe it's down to the government or sites full of millions of people to analyse and check every little thing possible, then that's an outrageous requirement. The internet is just like any other place outside the home. People who do majorly harass and attack other people can be prosecuted, bullies can't so much be however, but as just like in the real world, there are actions you can take to sort out said situations. If your child is acting differently, then as a parent it should be an easy tell if you know them well-enough from their mannerisms and general personality. I've had enough of seeing people who don't know what they're talking about trying to control this great thing we call the internet when they have the tools right under their fingers, if they'd care to use them. It is a dangerous place, but just like letting your kids go outside to a place they don't know, you have to take some security precautions as there are plenty of parallels between the internet and the world offline.

With current technology and how it seems younger folk are growing up a lot faster, it's our responsibility (although "uncool") to take a little control back on their safety as young people can be very naive and this can lead them to putting themselves into potentially dangerous situations.

Lagoon

AshleyAlden wrote: »

As a younger person who has been a victim to such things, I'd like to have my say and state that I do not think that stricter controls are needed from the government nor websites/online communities. Most sites give you more than enough controls with block/mute buttons, the ability to hide things from the prying public eyes and the ability to choose who you add into your personal space.

Without coming off as too personal, a lot of people who say that their kids need more protection on the internet in my opinion are lazy parents. I've seen it time and time again when things go wrong. You have many tools available to monitor and limit your children's activities on the internet and if you believe it's down to the government or sites full of millions of people to analyse and check every little thing possible, then that's an outrageous requirement. The internet is just like any other place outside the home. People who do majorly harass and attack other people can be prosecuted, bullies can't so much be however, but as just like in the real world, there are actions you can take to sort out said situations. If your child is acting differently, then as a parent it should be an easy tell if you know them well-enough from their mannerisms and general personality. I've had enough of seeing people who don't know what they're talking about trying to control this great thing we call the internet when they have the tools right under their fingers, if they'd care to use them. It is a dangerous place, but just like letting your kids go outside to a place they don't know, you have to take some security precautions as there are plenty of parallels between the internet and the world offline.

With current technology and how it seems younger folk are growing up a lot faster, it's our responsibility (although "uncool") to take a little control back on their safety as young people can be very naive and this can lead them to putting themselves into potentially dangerous situations.

Very well said. :T

BlueBella

jaibaby wrote: »

Woah! You said yourself you were bullied. I was bullied as a child but the people that did that to me actually apologised when we grew up - none of them are abusers or serial killers!


Yes I was bullied at school and a few years back. I never see the bullies from school so I don't know what they are like now and I received no apologies from them. I was bullied a few years back by adults (mothers) via Facebook - they have never apologised and to be honest, knowing they have kids and are adults, makes it more shocking!!

CyberStein

Lagoon wrote: »

Very well said. :T

And might I add, the solution to a lot of the problems, mainly ignorance in our world is education. Not only do children have to be educated on the importance of safety, but adults too must learn what is available to them and how they can use it.

Lagoon

AshleyAlden wrote: »

And might I add, the solution to a lot of the problems, mainly ignorance in our world is education. Not only do children have to be educated on the importance of safety, but adults too must learn what is available to them and how they can use it.

It's very true.

The fact is that parents are outraged saying 'there should be protection in place!', but don't seem to realise that the features are there and they're simply not using them.

There seem to be so many comments in the media from parents saying 'The problem is that this software is installed without us knowing. We need more information about how to delete this software'. They don't seem to even know how WEBSITES work. It's not software, it's always there and if you click any 'settings' button then you'll be well on your way to protecting your kids. It's not that a 'settings' button is difficult to find - you don't need a 100-page guide to show you how to click it.

CyberStein

Lagoon wrote: »

It's very true.

The fact is that parents are outraged saying 'there should be protection in place!', but don't seem to realise that the features are there and they're simply not using them.

There seem to be so many comments in the media from parents saying 'The problem is that this software is installed without us knowing. We need more information about how to delete this software'. They don't seem to even know how WEBSITES work. It's not software, it's always there and if you click any 'settings' button then you'll be well on your way to protecting your kids. It's not that a 'settings' button is difficult to find - you don't need a 100-page guide to show you how to click it.

Another issue I think is that as a society, with the amazing technology we have now, it's made us become lazy. It's so easy to simply "google" for answers, but in the process we miss out on the key skills of learning how to get to that answer, or why it's that way. In the same sense, it's easy to just install something or visit a website and just simply expect it all to be done for you. Saying that, we're also a society of shifting blame, which is again to do with ignorance.

We have so much information available to us and sure it can be misused, but so can anything else in our world. It's just that not enough of us actively use this information for our own benefit.

jaibaby

BlueBella wrote: »

Yes I was bullied at school and a few years back. I never see the bullies from school so I don't know what they are like now and I received no apologies from them. I was bullied a few years back by adults (mothers) via Facebook - they have never apologised and to be honest, knowing they have kids and are adults, makes it more shocking!!

I agree with you there - it's no wonder some kids behave like they do when you see their parents attitude.

I was speaking to my children's nan about this the other day when it was on the news - she said she's glad all her children are grown up and they never had the computers and internet years ago because she wouldn't have a clue where to start to protect anyone!

Which is another problem, as someone stated above. Some parents haven't a clue what their kids do online - some probably don't even realise they can go online! Some are just lazy and don't care to check!


If your child is going to use the internet, learn how to protect them first!