Irritating work colleague

Funky_Bold_Ribena

sussexchick wrote: »

Morning guys and girls

Huge thanks for all the replies and advice - loving the buddha story, made me giggle just thinking about a whooppee cushion (sighs, if only) !

I feel my best course of action will be to try and rise above her spiteful and nasty comments and HER attempt to embarrass ME infront of work colleagues. Everyone knows what she's like, I get the impression most people don't like her, but they have found a way to tolerate her. This is what I'm searching for the most really, just trying to find a coping mechanism before she pushes me completely over the edge.

Thanks for all the advice, I'll keep plugging away, just trying to find a little confidence and pluck up courage to 'give her a mouthful' when she feels the need to nit pick !

Don't give her a mouthful; reflect it back to her. 'In what context?' is my favourite...gives you time to formulate a response whilst they are trying to explain themselves. Or 'that's just like the time that you did X or Y isn't it?...'

meritaten

sussexchick wrote: »

Morning guys and girls

Huge thanks for all the replies and advice - loving the buddha story, made me giggle just thinking about a whooppee cushion (sighs, if only) !

I feel my best course of action will be to try and rise above her spiteful and nasty comments and HER attempt to embarrass ME infront of work colleagues. Everyone knows what she's like, I get the impression most people don't like her, but they have found a way to tolerate her. This is what I'm searching for the most really, just trying to find a coping mechanism before she pushes me completely over the edge.

Thanks for all the advice, I'll keep plugging away, just trying to find a little confidence and pluck up courage to 'give her a mouthful' when she feels the need to nit pick !

as I said before I only did 'temp' contracts. some of which could last for months or over a year if I was covering extended maternity leave. and like the others I find there is 'one in every workplace'! usually its the longest serving member of staff. dunno why?

I used to cope by thinking 'I am going to write this in my book one day (or as a sitcom), and look for the humorous aspect in it'.

luckily you don't have to live with her - just work alongside her. and that's a 'keyword' - alongside! as most posters say - just do your job and let her mess up hers! and have a little giggle to yourself when she does!

sussexchick

meritaten wrote: »

as I said before I only did 'temp' contracts. some of which could last for months or over a year if I was covering extended maternity leave. and like the others I find there is 'one in every workplace'! usually its the longest serving member of staff. dunno why?

I used to cope by thinking 'I am going to write this in my book one day (or as a sitcom), and look for the humorous aspect in it'.

luckily you don't have to live with her - just work alongside her. and that's a 'keyword' - alongside! as most posters say - just do your job and let her mess up hers! and have a little giggle to yourself when she does!

You'll be pleased to know I survived the day!. She was unusually pleasant ! Whats that all about then ?

I had little giggles to myself thinking of the whooppee cushion, then spent the remainder of the day plotting some sort of revenge and acts of sabotage ! Whilst stood at the photocopier I had all sorts of scenes running through my head, and the thought of them was much more fun than the event actually taking place !

And before anyone thinks the worst of me, I would never go through with it, but by george, it made me feel a whole lot better.:T

meritaten

sussexchick wrote: »

You'll be pleased to know I survived the day!. She was unusually pleasant ! Whats that all about then ?

I had little giggles to myself thinking of the whooppee cushion, then spent the remainder of the day plotting some sort of revenge and acts of sabotage ! Whilst stood at the photocopier I had all sorts of scenes running through my head, and the thought of them was much more fun than the event actually taking place !

And before anyone thinks the worst of me, I would never go through with it, but by george, it made me feel a whole lot better.:T

yes - sometimes envisioning your revenge is as much fun (probably more- as you don't have to feel guilty), as taking it!

decide on your coping strategies and stick to them. if you do feel your blood starting to come to the boil then remove yourself - go hide in the ladies or take your break. and hun - just remember if you are there long term - then she will retire first!

sussexchick

meritaten wrote: »

yes - sometimes envisioning your revenge is as much fun (probably more- as you don't have to feel guilty), as taking it!

decide on your coping strategies and stick to them. if you do feel your blood starting to come to the boil then remove yourself - go hide in the ladies or take your break. and hun - just remember if you are there long term - then she will retire first!

LOL - many thanks for your support and advice. Cheered me up no end xx

pennypinching77

Do you work for a government organisation?? They are notorious for keeping on difficult staff because it is too 'difficult' to get rid of them. Even so if you do work for them, surely you must have a bullying and harassment policy?
Has no-one ever given her a verbal or written warning?
Excuse me for jumping ahead of myself as have never worked in the private sector but I'm sure if you did she would already be out the door.
Whatever you do though, don't come down to her level.

sussexchick

pennypinching77 wrote: »

Do you work for a government organisation?? They are notorious for keeping on difficult staff because it is too 'difficult' to get rid of them. Even so if you do work for them, surely you must have a bullying and harassment policy?
Has no-one ever given her a verbal or written warning?
Excuse me for jumping ahead of myself as have never worked in the private sector but I'm sure if you did she would already be out the door.
Whatever you do though, don't come down to her level.

I do infact work for the private sector ! Hard to believe isn't it ! But then again when the 'manager' (terminology used lightly) witnesses the catty comments and downright rudeness, just chooses to ignore it, then the rest of us have little chance of answering back.

In the interim period, I'll just ponder and laugh at my revengeful sabotage tactics :cool:

Rom_london

Hey This Year. I didn't exactly suggest bullying, it was more a strategy that could be used to jog the person out of their repetitive behaviour. you know, tactics!

meritaten

sussexchick wrote: »

I do infact work for the private sector ! Hard to believe isn't it ! But then again when the 'manager' (terminology used lightly) witnesses the catty comments and downright rudeness, just chooses to ignore it, then the rest of us have little chance of answering back.

In the interim period, I'll just ponder and laugh at my revengeful sabotage tactics :cool:

Public and Private sector - little to choose from! I've worked for both and both are PITA when it comes to long serving staff! the worst tho is a 'Family Firm'. Do NOT ever criticise a family member no matter how lowly their position! its like working for the M A F I A!
I narrowly escaped the sack when I complained another barmaid had taken an hour break (15 mins it should have been). put their tips in a separate jar and not the 'bar staff' one. jeez - no-one told me it was the landlords daughter!

sp1987

I had one a few years back in a previous job who made me so irrirated I used to file my nails against my desk as a distraction from her drivelling nonsense. She always had a drama or a ridiculous story about some rubbish that nobody cared about, spoke nicely as anything to people and the minute they were out of earshot starting spouting insults to anyone who would listen. I started off nice, she wore me down so I was just hanging on to civil. In the end after her many "put downs" I just decided the most irritating I could be to her would be to laugh sweetly at her "attempts" at insults, tell her she was a "sweetheart" and carry on with my day. She really, absolutely, could not stand it. I also dropped in the occasional "n'awww it's sweet when you mother me" after the patronising tone of many of her comments/flawed insults despite there being little difference between us in age. She soon shut up with the mum-isms. I was always sure to offer her a chocolate, or a drink, or a hand with anything she might need. And I meant it. Nothing worse when she wanted to play martyr and was praying I'd snap than me being as cheerful as anything and wanting to be friendly.

The fact everyone saw me as making "a monumental but unreciprocated" effort with her made it all the sweeter. I realised she wasn't ever going to be pleasant and she only got something out of criticising others to talk her way out of her own insecurities.