How do YOU deal with depression?

paulineb_2

Ive had mild depression caused by work related stress, but it had a massive impact on my life, esteem, confidence. My GPs dont believe in giving out medication, Ive had 2 lots of anti depressants, 6 months each around ten years apart

The rest of the time Ive struggled on and it has been a struggle at times.
Exercise (and sometimes Ive not been able to exercise because Ive felt too low)

Had some counselling but didnt really feel it was for me, in fact Ive had some terrible counselling sessions where at the end Ive felt worse than when I went in.

Support of family, my mum has suffered in the workplace as well and knows how bad it gets at times.

The upside of the last lot of medication is that it seems to have cured my insomnia and Im sleeping better than I have been in 20 years and Im not on any medication just now.

And its very unlikely I will be again, because I had to have an almost meltdown in my GPs surgery because I was in such a state before I was prescribed anything.

I very much feel if I had had a supportive GP, my life wouldnt have been as tough over the years, but I havent and thats just the way it is.

Any counselling Ive had, Ive referred myself, again my GP's arent interested.

marisco_2

SunshineButterfly wrote: »

I just feel like an angry, anxious, moody ball of mess. Trying ever so hard to ensure that the kids do not pick up on any of it.

After all you have been through and coped with over the last few months, I am not at all surprised that you feel this way. Traumatic events in life always have a knock on effect on a persons wellbeing and sense of security. Don't bottle up any of these emotions. Counselling could be very beneficial for you. If you can get out and mix with people. It will do yourself and your children a lot of good. Isolating yourself and trying to work through all this on your own is not good for you.

SunshineButterfly

marisco wrote: »

After all you have been through and coped with over the last few months, I am not at all surprised that you feel this way. Traumatic events in life always have a knock on effect on a persons wellbeing and sense of security. Don't bottle up any of these emotions. Counselling could be very beneficial for you. If you can get out and mix with people. It will do yourself and your children a lot of good. Isolating yourself and trying to work through all this on your own is not good for you.

Thanks. Luckily due to my university course I have many I can speak to if needed. And my tutors are all qualified counsellors which also helps lol.
I have arranged a play date tomorrow at mine, so even though we are not going out I will be in lovely company and my children will have lots of friends to play with. We may also go to the park if the weather makes its mind up and stays nice.

With me I am quite tough on myself, so get quite annoyed when I cannot just "fix" myself immediately with these moods or feelings.
Also with all the children have been through I am trying so hard to give them my all, that when I am not feeling as into it as usual and am not being as patient as I would like that adds to my feelings of hopelessness and frustration as then I tar myself with the bad mother brush.

Today we have stayed in all day which I feel very very guilty about. I have managed to tidy and clean and get on top of half of the house, but this has been very very forced. The kids have had lots of toys to play with and have been out in the yard with their bike and scooters and balls and have seemed quite content.

But with adults such as friends and partner I have been quite withdraw with them and snappy.. which is not good as they do not deserve it.

I am hoping tomorrow is a nice day that can begin with a more positive mind and a bit of a smile!

I usually comfort eat quite a lot... but today I have barely eaten. My appetite has vanished!

marisco_2

You are being way too hard on yourself. All of us experience feelings and emotions that floor us at times. No-one has the answer to everything which is why we turn to friends, family or MSE for support Stop trying to be all things to all people all the time and look after yourself. Cut yourself some slack and acknowledge all the great things you have done for your kids.

You are a great mum but I think you have been knocked down for so long by others, that you cant make yourself believe this. It is okay to have quiet days at home with the kids doing household stuff. Don't beat yourself up over this or feel guilty at all. It teaches kids good lessons in life about how adults run their lives. As a child I remember fitting into my parents schedules, whether that meant being home while they were occupied doing things, going shopping, visiting a library. It certainly wasn't all trips down the park, swimming pool, beach etc. Very often I was expected to amuse myself and get on with it. Did me no harm at all.

I hope you all enjoy the play date tomorrow

bagpussbear

I've experienced depression over 4 episodes in my life, 2 were severe.

Antidepressants were a life saver at the time, but I didn't want to take them for the rest of my life.

I now use 5-HTP supplement (you can buy from health shops, I get mine from Amazon) which helps me when I think I am getting a 'wobble'.

They certainly help me, perhaps you could look into that?

Frith

I have had depression on and off since I was 18 (am now 38). I also have had PTSD since 2005 thanks to my ex husband although that has lessened. By the time I have got fed up of being depressed (!) and go to the doctors, it is usually at the maximum score on the depressions score sheet and I can barely talk.

So far I have tried: 2 psychiatrists for about a year each (I was too ill at the time to be able to tell you the techniques they used!), 1 psychiatric nurse for 7 months who used CBT which DID help and 2 counsellors when I've been on the waiting list for the "big guns".

I was on antidepressants from 2005 - 2007 then about 2008 - 2010. I found quickly I can't take SSRIs so was on the more old fashioned tricyclics. I was never convinced they did much. I did take them religiously and weaned myself off them over several months.

For about 8 months I have taken St John's Wort and it seems more effective, oddly.

Other techniques I use day to day are keeping life as simple as possible and trying to sort problems out straight away so I don't obsess over them. I try to do some exercise and eat a healthy diet.

At the moment I am following Paul McKenna's book "Change your life in 7 days" as this was recommended to me by the Psych department a few months back but I had not got round to it.

JoolzS

Don't beat yourself up about needing anti-depressants. I've never known a diabetic trying to wean themselves off insulin and no-one ever expects them to just get better! If ADs make you feel better, then keep using them for as long as you need - even if that is for years.

I don't like how ADs make me feel (just flat with no ups or downs) so I stopped using them years ago. I have gradually got a little better, but I'm in the fortunate position of not needing to work, have no kids, and my DH is very supportive. If my circumstances were different then I'd try ADs again in a heartbeat and stay on them for as long as necessary, even if that was the rest of my life.

viscachaz

I also come on and off antidepressants (every time vowing I'll never take them again, as stopping SSRIs cold turkey is pretty horrendous..) when I'm not on them, I just try to ignore it.. accept it's there and wait until either something happens that gives me a buzz and makes me feel okay, or I feel so immensely bad I start taking them again before I do something bad to myself..

Not sure I can ever be "cured", but you shouldn't feel bad about taking them! That's one thing, I always feel like I've "lost the battle" when I have to resort to taking them, but remember, it won't be forever, you don't HAVE to take them if you don't want to, you're not obliged to, but you're taking them because they make you feel okay, nothing more! You still have control over them, and not the other way round! ^_^

skattykatty

Out of curiosity Sunshine...what kind of counselling course are you undertaking that doesn't require you to have your own personal counselling? Intrigued.

GravityTolls: a question for you - a weekly, 60 minute, counselling session works out as 0.6% of your entire week!!!! Does it still seem self indulgent?

Any self respecting counsellor or therapist will probably let you know that you could feel worse before you feel better, which can be anxiety provoking in itself. That's why, once stabilised with meds, it may be more suitable to begin a talking therapy.

If you are totally anti-counselling/therapy...you might want to read Dr David Servan-Schreiber's book: Healing without Freud or Prozac

SunshineButterfly

skatty katty as part of the learning process I will be counselled by other students on the course. And we are offered counselling ourselves, but that is up to us if we choose to take it.
It is an undergraduate counselling and psychotherapy degree.

Although I guess you could say the course in itself is counselling? As we do a lot of work on "ourselves" and dealing with our issues as obviously you cannot help others if you cannot first help yourself.