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Feeling guilty!
Phantomjoy
Posts: 41 Forumite
Your views and constructive comments most appreciated.
OH and I viewed a house (H1) about 6 weeks ago which was on the market for 300. We liked it because it had everything we were looking for. The house is owned by a lovely old couple (must be 70+ yr old). She told me that they were selling to go into sheltered accommodation due to his ill health.
We offered 275k and that was rejected pretty sharpish. I said to the EA that I will think about whether I can go any higher and left it at that for about a week. In the meantime, we started looking at other houses. We saw another one (H2) that we loved. It was about a mile from where we live. It was on the market 285k and needs some work. EA told me that he already had an offer of 260k on it.
We liked the house so much that I offered 265k after 2nd viewing. EA told me that the 260 was rejected and the vendors said that the house had only been on the market for 1 week and they prefer to wait for a few weeks to see what other offers they got. So we left it at that and continued viewing other houses without much luck. the 265k offer was not put to the vendors. I agreed to that.
The EA for H1 kept in touch as he had other houses I was interested in viewing and every time he would ring me, I would ask him what did the old couple say? I would ask him to talk to them for them to reconsider.
After about 1 week, I raised my offer on H1 to 280 k and that was rejected sharpish and the EA told me that the couple hadn't budged from their position.
2 weeks later, i.e. after H2 had been on the market for 4 weeks, I called the EA for H2 for an update and a colleague said that they had another offer at 265k and I had to raise my offer. So I made an offer in writing for 266k detailing my position and that I was proceedable straight away. I also raised my offer on H1 to 285k which was also rejected but this time the EA said the couple was looking for about 290k. I told him that 285 was my final offer and it will only be on the table for 1 week.
on 18/7, a few days after, got an email from EA of H2 saying 266 had been rejected and the vendors wanted to wait longer to see what offers they received. I got pretty annoyed at that point and I emailed the EA to say that I was very close to withdrawing all my offers but not before talking to him. He called 2 hours later and told me that he was meeting the vendor the next day. So I asked him to ask the vendor if there was a figure that they would do the deal.
on the morning of 19/7, got a call from a colleague of EA of H1 to say that the couple had their eye on a property and if they like it, they would accept 285k. The same afternoon, the EA of H2 told me that the vendor would settle for 270k.
OH and I love H2 and we like H1. My dilemma, about which I am feeling very very guilty, is how do I tell H1 couple that I am withdrawing my offer provided of course 270 is accepted for H2. I haven't slept at all thinking about what would I feel if someone did that to me. Ok you could argue that they haven't even seen the property they want yet etc.
any ideas or views on what I can or what I should do please?
many thanks in advance.
OH and I viewed a house (H1) about 6 weeks ago which was on the market for 300. We liked it because it had everything we were looking for. The house is owned by a lovely old couple (must be 70+ yr old). She told me that they were selling to go into sheltered accommodation due to his ill health.
We offered 275k and that was rejected pretty sharpish. I said to the EA that I will think about whether I can go any higher and left it at that for about a week. In the meantime, we started looking at other houses. We saw another one (H2) that we loved. It was about a mile from where we live. It was on the market 285k and needs some work. EA told me that he already had an offer of 260k on it.
We liked the house so much that I offered 265k after 2nd viewing. EA told me that the 260 was rejected and the vendors said that the house had only been on the market for 1 week and they prefer to wait for a few weeks to see what other offers they got. So we left it at that and continued viewing other houses without much luck. the 265k offer was not put to the vendors. I agreed to that.
The EA for H1 kept in touch as he had other houses I was interested in viewing and every time he would ring me, I would ask him what did the old couple say? I would ask him to talk to them for them to reconsider.
After about 1 week, I raised my offer on H1 to 280 k and that was rejected sharpish and the EA told me that the couple hadn't budged from their position.
2 weeks later, i.e. after H2 had been on the market for 4 weeks, I called the EA for H2 for an update and a colleague said that they had another offer at 265k and I had to raise my offer. So I made an offer in writing for 266k detailing my position and that I was proceedable straight away. I also raised my offer on H1 to 285k which was also rejected but this time the EA said the couple was looking for about 290k. I told him that 285 was my final offer and it will only be on the table for 1 week.
on 18/7, a few days after, got an email from EA of H2 saying 266 had been rejected and the vendors wanted to wait longer to see what offers they received. I got pretty annoyed at that point and I emailed the EA to say that I was very close to withdrawing all my offers but not before talking to him. He called 2 hours later and told me that he was meeting the vendor the next day. So I asked him to ask the vendor if there was a figure that they would do the deal.
on the morning of 19/7, got a call from a colleague of EA of H1 to say that the couple had their eye on a property and if they like it, they would accept 285k. The same afternoon, the EA of H2 told me that the vendor would settle for 270k.
OH and I love H2 and we like H1. My dilemma, about which I am feeling very very guilty, is how do I tell H1 couple that I am withdrawing my offer provided of course 270 is accepted for H2. I haven't slept at all thinking about what would I feel if someone did that to me. Ok you could argue that they haven't even seen the property they want yet etc.
any ideas or views on what I can or what I should do please?
many thanks in advance.
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Comments
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Just make your decision (promptly) and stick to it. Nothing to feel guilty about, it is not as it you have been stringing people along up to exchange only to withdraw. It is highly unlikely anyone has committed anything which will lose them money in the 2 days since you received the acceptances.0
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You tell EA 1 that you have an offer in place for house 2 and you are not in a position to offer on house 1.
Why is that difficult?0 -
You tell EA 1 that you have an offer in place for house 2 and you are not in a position to offer on house 1.
Why is that difficult?
I am finding it hard mrginge. don't know why. that's why I am asking for the best way to "let them down". maybe it is because of the age of the couple and his illness. maybe I would feel the same way if it was a young couple. I don't know. never been in this position before.0 -
Pretty poor to have been offering on two properties at once without telling both vendors as obviously was always a risk that you were going to renege on one of the deals.
However now is the time to be honest with H1 and just tell them that you carried on viewing other properties after they initially rejected your offer and you've now seen another house that suits you better.Every generation blames the one before...
Mike + The Mechanics - The Living Years0 -
MobileSaver wrote: »Pretty poor to have been offering on two properties at once without telling both vendors
Not really, since all offers were rejected, up until the point that the H1 couple changed their mind.
.... PS In fact even their mind change was conditional on them "liking the house they were viewing", so there is currently only one proceedable offer, H2.0 -
I think as long as you make your mind up quick and be honest then they can't expect anything more tbh. It's just the way it works OUt sometimesHave a Bsc Hons open degree from the Open University 2015 :j:D:eek::T0
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I'd just say that another property you offered on previously have come back to you and accepted your offer at a lower price so you need to withdraw you offer on H1. You never know they might then say that they will take less and that may make H1 more preferable to you. Sort of a reverse bidding war!
Neither house has accepted your offer so your quite free to go with whatever house you wish without feeling guilty. It would be different if you had an offer accepted although even then your perfectly within your rights to withdraw (not nice for the vendors though)0 -
Phantomjoy wrote: »I am finding it hard mrginge. don't know why. that's why I am asking for the best way to "let them down". maybe it is because of the age of the couple and his illness. maybe I would feel the same way if it was a young couple. I don't know. never been in this position before.
Tbh it sounds like you've far too friendly with EAs and vendors. Your overall tone seems to suggest that you think you are in some way responsible for all these people, whereas in reality you should be playing each EA off against each other to get the best deal for yourselves.0 -
I don't think there is any need of guilt here. You made offers, they were rejected. The vendors can't expect you to remain in limbo until they decide they're willing to negotiate.
It seems they've been quick to impose conditions on accepting any offer, maybe you should clarify some conditions of your own. Neither party can have things completely their own way.:www: Progress Report :www:
Offer accepted: £107'000
Deposit: £23'000
Mortgage approved for: £84'000
Exchanged: 2/3/16
:T ... complete on 9/3/16 ... :T0 -
It's a business decision, nothing to feel guilty about. You do what's right for you, not for Anyone else.0
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