So looking forward to my husband retiring BUT-----

scubaleopard

My husband and I have been married for over 30 years -inthe main very happily. We have 3 grown up children 1 of whom still lives at home.
I retired from full time teaching 7 years ago although I am kept fairly busy with supply work.

Obviously there are major financial implications but we have done our best to prepare ourselves for that aspect of our new life.

What is worrying me a bit is how to support him as he starts a new period in his life. I do think it must be very hard for a man who has worked full time for over 30 years, is somewhat defined by his job, is used to the comaraderie of the workplace to become accustomed to life in retirement

We have very good lines of communication and have talked about it. He has been on rpre-retirement courses etc and he loves golf and we walk a lot together.

Has anyone any tips that have worked for them Moneysaving, personal or social.

I do know he will think me strange for spending hours on here.

I am trying to make him a jokey retirement survival box. So far a really good cookery book--- he is very domesticated-- a new good read --- some canvases for these modern paintings he likes --- any other good ideas would be welcome

[Deleted User]

It isn`t only about the husband. Suddenly the wife has a dh about the house all the time.

My DH retired 3 weeks ago and fortunately has his own hobbies and interests to keep him busy. He was fortunate in that he worked half a week all of last year. It is more difficult than most people realise. So far we are doing well in that we have had some holidays and he has enough work from his p/t photography business to get him out of the house a few days a month

I feel that it is important to keep individual hobbies going, or to learn new ones. Join a photography club for example

In our case we have a first grandchild to look forward to.

We were given national trust cards and we intend to use them. Got to make a real effort but it`s like setting a new foundation all over again

paddy's_mum

Apart from the sensible moves you have already made, I would also recommend that, if it is at all possible, you set aside a small room or area just for yourself. Call it your bolt-hole. Hubby may like a similar area (called the doghouse no doubt!)

In each case, the other must knock on the door and respect privacy. We all need some space to call our own, where we can escape constant togetherness. That little bit of space, in my experience, makes the together times even better and more valued. Good luck.

scubaleopard

Thanks so much for the ideas so far. It is so nice to think other people care enough to reply

seven-day-weekend

Before we retired, we both went part-time at work- he did two days, I did three. He didn't necessarily do the same two days every term, but we always made sure we had Friday off together.

We spent our Fridays together, visiting friends, driving out into the country, visiting an art gallery.....what we didn't do on Fridays was work!

This paved the way for full retirement two years later, when we moved to Spain and had plenty to do adjusting to a new life!

But the advice I want to give is, to do as we did on our Fridays, and wind down gently, doing things together that you would never normally do on a 'working' day.

And the idea of a 'den' each is also a good one if you can do it.

Wishing you well.

holstar

Could he start some volunteer work? in a shop for example...an OXfam bookshop might be preferable to a normal charity shop (might be terrified by the thought of so many clothes!) but I don't know if you have one near you.

My grandpa delivered for the local meals on wheels scheme for a long time...again, it depends if you ave one near you.

[Deleted User]

I fully second the individual den. We have a room each, and we have a computer in each. It is very very important to keep some space for each of you individually

Counting_Pennies_2

My inlaws have a fantastic retirement life.

My father in law was retired from the navy, he was retired in his 50s, so has got used to his life as a man of leisure and he loves it.

He loves fiddling about with investments, and surfing the web, he is more electronically minded than me.

He plays golf and has got into the social life in the club really well.

Both he and my mother in law belong to http://www.nadfas.org.uk/ it might be worth checking them out. You can dip in and out of activities and go on trips, which tend to be fairly reasonably priced. It might give you both an activity together. They each go off on their own to different events run by the organisation, and they find it a brilliant social and fairly reasonably priced arena.

hth