What would you make your 17 year old pay for?

pigpen

My almost 16 (just left yr 11 off to college in September) DD and my 17 y/o son get their phone bill paid.. £7.50 with Tesco mobile.. capped so no going over that.. definitely worth looking into!! AND with decent phones. My contract is only £25 a month!

Each get £30 a week to cover their bus fares, college necessaries, lunches (4 days) and any other stuff they need.. actually thinking about it DD2 will not have the bus to pay for so will probably get £20 a week.. hhmm just thought of that one!. They get £100 at the beginning of each academic year to cover a new bag, new shoes and any clothes they need. Other than that I pay their food and housing costs and thy get the odd bit for cinema or other luxury IF I can afford it and they work off the debt. It is basically the CB rounded up.

DS2 has learning / social difficulties so doesn't have a pt job though is being encouraged to volunteer at various places for experience and to get him out of the house and hopefully encourage his social development before he becomes a total hermit. DD2 hasn't got work this summer purely because no one will employ her as she is 15, we are in a high student population area so employers go for them instead... another disadvantage for June-August babies .

These do jobs around the house.. anything they are asked to do and I don't do nagging, they do it first time! It is a family house therefore everyone does their bit.. no one nags me to wash their clothes or cook their dinner I just do it so I expect no less from them.. They pick up/drop off younger siblings too.

In your shoes I'd not give her anything, find a much cheaper phone contract and make her aware anything over that she pays and put the £10 away for her as a reward for doing exams to give as a lump sum when she gets results or whatever you think appropriate.. but keep it a secret.

Savvy_Sue

pigpen wrote: »

Each get £30 a week to cover their bus fares, college necessaries, lunches (4 days) and any other stuff they need.. actually thinking about it DD2 will not have the bus to pay for so will probably get £20 a week.. hhmm just thought of that one!.

Could be worth thinking about whether there's anything 'major' and useful which she needs, mine all got the same allowance, but DS1 spent most of his on bus fares; DS2 decided to walk so he could save this (4 miles each way, and he was setting out at 7 am, his choice!); and DS3 asked us to lend him some of his allowance up front so that he could buy a bike!

That bike turned out to be a real money and time saver for us, before he got it he would always want lifts to go anywhere, even if the bus or - no really! - WALKING would get him there fine. Once he had his bike, he NEVER wanted a lift unless he had more than he could carry on it, like his guitar or his amp.

LondonDiva

I would get her to:
Set aside an amount that would go into savings (even if only £20pm)
Pay her phone bill - seems very high, it's possibly worth sitting with her and using it as a learning opportunity to renegotiate or review what other options are out there.
A token amount to you for her 'keep' (and no' saving it up and giving it back').
Fares to work and socialising (and any associated costs)
Lunches (if she wants a meal for school etc, needs to use stuff from the kitchen or buy her own)
Clothes / accessories that aren't 'parental issue / standard'
Make up

I'd also stop giving her money.

Good luck - whatever you do, you'll be told that so & so's mum would never think about being so harsh, so you may as well do what works for you.

paddedjohn

I was just about to say that she earns enough to start looking after herself and then I realised im still paying my 22 year old daughters shopping bill.;)

jetplane

When our daughter was at college we paid for a phone contract so she could always contact us, a bus pass so she was never stranded and loaded money onto a lunch card so she always had lunch. We paid her child benefit and the £10 child tax credit you used to get those days into her bank account. She got a part time job and learned to manage her own money buying anything else she needed, clothes, outings, college stuff etc.

Sooetie

I have 18 n 15 yo males

Wow they are my sons

Duh what are they worth

The World

bagpussbear

Personally I wouldn't take anything from her (though I agree, try and reduce the mobile phone bill).

The way I see it is she is 17 - not yet an adult and still at school - and she sounds a good girl by going out and finding a job whilst she is studying, which I think is admirable. After all, she doesn't have to do that.

I would, for at least the time before she is 18, get her to save a bit of her earnings.

Obviously at 18 as an adult age, she should understand things change and you should start a plan of what she should pay for then.

I don't believe in spoiling kids, but I do think parents should cut them slack before they reach adulthood. Realise others will disagree, but that's how I feel about it.

jetplane

bagpussbear wrote:

I don't believe in spoiling kids, but I do think parents should cut them slac before they reach adulthood. Realise others will disagree, but that's how I feel about it.

I agree, they are still our children trying to make their way and our daughter learned a valuable skill in money management while making that transition to independence.

Dunroamin

Essentials you pay for, wants she does.

Dunroamin

LondonDiva wrote: »

I would get her to:
Set aside an amount that would go into savings (even if only £20pm)
Pay her phone bill - seems very high, it's possibly worth sitting with her and using it as a learning opportunity to renegotiate or review what other options are out there.
A token amount to you for her 'keep' (and no' saving it up and giving it back').
Fares to work and socialising (and any associated costs)
Lunches (if she wants a meal for school etc, needs to use stuff from the kitchen or buy her own)
Clothes / accessories that aren't 'parental issue / standard'
Make up

I'd also stop giving her money.

Good luck - whatever you do, you'll be told that so & so's mum would never think about being so harsh, so you may as well do what works for you.

I'm a great believer in young working adults paying their way but not while they're in education and their parents are still receiving financial support for them from the state.